On the Nose dialogue

[PeteRodgersuk]

Could someone please explain and give an examaple of "On the Nose Dialogue"

Thanks.

[TwoBrad Bradley]

One example is when a character says exactly what he feels:

BOB
I don't want you to move to the city because I really love you. I would die if you left me.

rather than:

BOB
It's really dangerous in the city.

(Some people confuse "on the nose" with "show don't tell" as I'm sure you will soon see.)

[talesfromthehood]

Excellent answer, TwoBrad.

“When a character states exactly what he wants it's called on-the-nose dialogue. The character is speaking the subtext. There is no hidden meaning behind the words, no secret want, because everything is spelled out.” -- Speech as Character - The Art of Writing Dialogue by Charles Deemer (Sep-05-2001)

[Deus Ex Machine]

I agree and disagree with Two brad's answer. It is commonly used to describe dialogue where a character says exactly how they feel, but it is also used when a character says exactly what they are trying to say.

JOE
Don't listen to him. He's an idiot.

or

JOE
You'll have to excuse my friend.
He has and empty stomach and it's
gone to his head.

[Cyfress]

The most common practice of On The nose Dialogue is when the writer uses dialogue to feed exposition/plot to the reader.

[wcmartell]

When characters say something in the most obvious way.

Usually expositional dialogue - characters giving a big block of information, or information about exactly how they feel, who they are, or what they are thinking.

Best way to get rid of it - let the actions tell the story and take the pressure off the dialogue. Now the dialogue can be fun, show character, and it doesn't have to carry the story.

In real life people never say what they want, they hint around.

- Bill

[T Ziegler]

I'm none of those posters, but I can't resist answering this:

"If dialogue isn't on the nose, what is such a reader left with?"

A brain.

Not snarking at you, dk, but really -- if a reader isn't able to get the story from dialogue that isn't on-the-nose, that's a bad reader. If he's skimming and not reading ANY action lines (which strikes me as stupid anyway), and the action is critical to understand what's going on in the story, then he'll be confused regardless of the subtlety (or lack thereof) in the dialogue.

Action describes what characters do, not (usually) what they're thinking or feeling. Dialogue reveals that, either gracefully or clunkily, but doesn't tell you what the character is doing. They're two separate things, and the idea is that they work together in a screenplay to give you a full story.

If I'm misunderstanding your question, I apologize. Maybe you could give an example of a script where on-the-nose dialogue would make it easier to understand the story if the reader to chose to read NONE of the action description. Seriously, I can't see it. (Unless, of course, the dialogue was something like "I'm now defusing the bomb.")

TZ

[dk23]

If he's skimming and not reading ANY action lines (which strikes me as stupid anyway)
I agree, but that's supposedly what a lot of readers do when pressed for time. In the world of spec submissions, I would think that needs to be taken into account.

Action describes what characters do, not (usually) what they're thinking or feeling. Dialogue reveals that, either gracefully or clunkily, but doesn't tell you what the character is doing. They're two separate things, and the idea is that they work together in a screenplay to give you a full story.
Exactly. What happens when that skimming reader misses half the story because the dialogue doesn't cover what is occurring?

Dan

[vmf]

The most common practice of On The nose Dialogue is when the writer uses dialogue to feed exposition/plot to the reader.

Yep, that's the real danger, and is far more prevalent than what some view as "on the nose" dialogue with little subtext, which is pretty common in most films.

It's the "Hey honey, you'd better get up. Aunt Edna is flying in today at 9 AM for our 25th wedding anniversary party, and you know how she dislikes waiting, so pick her up before you leave to your job as CEO of Braintrust Inc. I don't have time, since as the new DA, I'm trying my first murder case at 8:30" trap.

[Deus Ex Machine]

LOL @ VMF

I love the introduction exposition.

John meet Fred, my older brother who practically raised me and has been my Father figure all my life even though he's struggling with his alcoholism which was been brought on by his guilt for driving the car that ran over our mother who, as you know, has been in a nursing home in a coma ever since.

[TwoBrad Bradley]

The definitions of different types of dialogue are starting to blur. I only think it's important to keep them separate because they each have different solutions.

How do you determine when to fix it - when it's too much?

TOO MUCH ON THE NOSE
In Act III it may be okay to say "I love you" but not in Act I.

TOO MUCH EXPOSITION
Some is needed, maybe even required. When is a character explaining too much?

TOO MUCH TELLING INSTEAD OF SHOWING
Sometimes it's okay for a character to say "I'm going to stand up, take my car keys and walk out that door."

Maybe the type of "fix" makes the dialogue what it "was".
Do you say something different (less vulnerable) than "I love you" or do you SHOW it instead?

But the tricky part (who said this stuff was easy?) is to know when to fix it. We need to analyze every single word of dialogue to determine:
- if we are writing visually
- if we are writing believable characters
- if we are (see other thread) moving the story forward.