My first read = pass from Richard Donner :(

[billtei]

Pitched Derek Hoffman at The Donners' Company over the phone and he agreed to read it. I signed the release about a month ago and just got back their response. I'm actually impressed that they provided some coverage:

Bill,
We are going to pass on West Bank. I think you have some good ideas, but the characters were lacking for me. I wanted to see more of the secondary characters, namely Iyad and Leila, developed more. The didn't stand out as real people. And Ben's self admitted corny jokes took away from serious information he was giving. I think the backdrop is a hard one, because it demands a lot from your story, and I just didn't feel it.
Thanks for thinking of us, and good luck with it.

Best,

Derek Hoffman

[kidcharlemagne]

Yes normally it's the standard line: "It's not for us" or "It's not what were looking for right now", although the latter is more the preferred pass language for talent agents.

[billtei]

Yes normally it's the standard line: "It's not for us" or "It's not what were looking for right now", although the latter is more the preferred pass language for talent agents.

The few times I have managed to pitch a decision-maker on the phone, it seems things go downhill as soon as I say "drama". It seems everyone is looking for comedies these days. I even had one gatekeeper say something to the effect of "we don't want anything too heavy, with the way the economy is, war going on" etc.

[GreatOz]

Getting any kind of comment like that is rare and classy. You can at least feel good about that.

I just had a script go into Donner's last week, via a different C.E. My first time with them.

[doubler83]

It's pretty cool that they actually gave you some feedback instead of the usual "thanks, but no thanks" response you normally get.

Like GreatOz said, getting any kind of comment like that is rare and classy. Kudos to them.

Good luck with yours, Oz.

[Raw_and_Vital]

Tough luck on the pass but congratz on at least getting that far!

[Wordsmithteer]

It was great the person took the time to provide some additional feedback.

I recently had a company pass on a script - it wasn't for them. Then they added the script was fun and well executed. Made my day with those four words :)

[billtei]

Getting any kind of comment like that is rare and classy. You can at least feel good about that.

I just had a script go into Donner's last week, via a different C.E. My first time with them.

Agreed, I wish they were all that professional ... and good luck with your script! Hopefully your secondary characters are more developed than mine ... lol

[billtei]

Thanks to everyone for your encouragement! Agreed, Derek is a class act. I'm actually flattered that he took the time to provide such detailed feedback. It's a small company (about 10 people) so there's a good chance Richard Donner himself read it. More motivation for me to get working on the next script and kiss my day job goodbye! :D

[kidcharlemagne]

Drama is a hard sell in Hollywood unless its based on a best selling novel and even then there is no guarantee for box office success. Still, the irony is that the studios need a few dramas for the Oscar season.

[Great White Mark]

I used to know Derek socailly & hang out with him sometimes when I lived in LA. He's a good guy & knows his stuff. Better luck next time kid.

[billtei]

Drama is a hard sell in Hollywood unless its based on a best selling novel and even then there is no guarantee for box office success. Still, the irony is that the studios need a few dramas for the Oscar season.

Finding that out the hard way ... lol. It almost makes sense to pitch first, then pound out a script if they like the idea.

[billtei]

I used to know Derek socailly & hang out with him sometimes when I lived in LA. He's a good guy & knows his stuff. Better luck next time kid.

cool, wish everyone in the industry was like that ... thx

[SBScript]

Pitched Derek Hoffman at The Donners' Company over the phone and he agreed to read it. I signed the release about a month ago and just got back their response. I'm actually impressed that they provided some coverage:

Bill,
We are going to pass on West Bank. I think you have some good ideas, but the characters were lacking for me. I wanted to see more of the secondary characters, namely Iyad and Leila, developed more. The didn't stand out as real people. And Ben's self admitted corny jokes took away from serious information he was giving. I think the backdrop is a hard one, because it demands a lot from your story, and I just didn't feel it.
Thanks for thinking of us, and good luck with it.

Best,

Derek Hoffman

That's a kind pass, but I have to ask, why the heck would you even submit something like a drama set in the Middle East (I'm assuming that based on the title and character names) to a company that would never buy it? I

Did you do any research on Donner's company before you approached them?

[billtei]

That's a kind pass, but I have to ask, why the heck would you even submit something like a drama set in the Middle East (I'm assuming that based on the title and character names) to a company that would never buy it? I

Did you do any research on Donner's company before you approached them?

They actually have several dramas in development, and I figured they would be interested in a compelling story that could be produced on a modest budget.

[La Femme Joyeuse]

That is a very nice PASS and it is one of those experiences along the way for you that is at least a little validating.

It is a subject of great curiosity to me that nobody wants dramas, much less period dramas and yet every Oscar season, dramas grab the brass ring. It's a paradox. A riddle wrapped in an enigma. One prodco I still read for is Bedford Falls and they do like big, epic dramas - Oscar bait, as they say. But they are also a relatively small outfit and do look for work from established writers.

[SBScript]

They actually have several dramas in development, and I figured they would be interested in a compelling story that could be produced on a modest budget.

I'm not trying to give you a hard time, but I think it might be wise for you to do a little more due diligence on your submissions. They have probably one real drama in development and that's only because Mel is attached.

If you look at who Dick is as a director, the terms, modest, compelling, and drama do not apply. My point is, IMO, it's hard enough to succeed without setting yourself up for failure. Delivering your material into the wrong hands isn't going to help you achieve your goals. Best of luck with it, though, I know it's a tough play to get a drama out into the market.

[Naudikom]

Yeah, dramas are a very hard sell. Most - in fact, nearly all - dramas that see the screen are novel adaptations or indies.

I don't write dramas. I think I came up with the secret, though. Does someone fall in love? It's a romance. Does someone chase someone else, or maybe fire a gun? You got yourself a thriller.

It's mischevious, but it might work.

[NikeeGoddess]

Did you do any research on Donner's company before you approached them?i'm in the research camp as well. however... i pitched a drama to derek (in person) a couple of years ago and he like it. maybe they've done a lot of high concept, comedy/action flicks in the past but they may be looking for something new and different. you never know and if they say they'll read the script why would you object?

six months later he agreed to accept the script while we had lunch in some joint in beverly hills. he kept saying, "are you sure this is the best it can be?" and i was so like, "yeah, yeah!"

now, i'm kicking myself because a year later the script is so much better than it was. it's kind of like premature ejaculation.

yeah, he passed. and i got a parking ticket. i sent the city of beverly hills $25!!! like they needed it.

[ComicBent]

La Femme said: It is a subject of great curiosity to me that nobody wants dramas.
I am just guessing, but I think it is all about money. I think drama has to be pretty darn good to get any traction with the public. Comedy, on the other hand, can be mediocre and still make some money.

[Naudikom]

Most people go to movies to relax, kick back after a long week and have a good time - so they choose movies that provoke lighter emotions, such as amusement or excitment.

[trujosh]

Still, the irony is that the studios need a few dramas for the Oscar season.


not at all. studios rarely look for drama for oscar purposes.
they say yes only when a star brings it in and they want to make them happy, so he or she can star in their next blokbuster.

or the buy one already made, as a negative pick up.

oscar season is very expensive, corporations are not in for the kudos.

just for the profit.

so, studio, no. prodco, maybe.

[Carlton Redford]

Most top screenwriters who avoid dramas will tell you that by far, the best dramatic writing today is being done for television. The products are excellent and the public is thus satiated and saturated.

And this is also ironically and mysteriously contrary to the often-posed notion that folks seeking entertainment simply want to kick back and enjoy a comedy.

There is obviously some cultural sea change that now makes being absorbed and emotionally drained by a drama in your living room more appealing than the same experience surrounded by hundreds of strangers in a cineplex.

Something for future sociologists and psychologists to unravel. No doubt the ubiquitous gut-wrenching 24/7 cable news and web news about war and weather disasters plays into this sea change concerning entertainment venue choices and the decisions of market-savvy producers.

-- Carlton

[NikeeGoddess]

not at all. studios rarely look for drama for oscar purposes.
they say yes only when a star brings it in and they want to make them happy, so he or she can star in their next blokbuster.may both reasons. independent companies may find it easier to get investor money if they had a picture that was at least nominated for an oscar.
Most top screenwriters who avoid dramas will tell you that by far, the best dramatic writing today is being done for television.and with all the cable television producing movies these days and network competing with them there's one good reason to look toward television with your drama. besides, more people may see your flick on showtime than in the theaters. what's wrong with that?!

[Wordsmithteer]

Anyone have an email address for Derek Hoffman? If yes, please PM me :)

[cvolante]

There are a LOT of scripts classified as comedies that I think are straight up dramas that someone desperately wants to sell.

Even at the video store things come up in comedy: GO? Go's a great movie. It's kind of funny. About as funny as Pulp Fiction. Neither is something I'd really expect to find in the comedy section.

So: yeah! Comedies! Wahoo!:p

[Robot17]

I just pitch it and let them worry aboout whether its for them or not.
Not my business as long as they ask for it.

[SBScript]

SBS, he pitched the script over the phone and the guy asked for it.<<

I understand. Personally, I wouldn't have spent my time making the call when it would be such a long shot at that company. I would want to identify the most likely buyers and spend my time going after them.

>>So the bigger question as I see it is why would a busy production company that would never buy a drama (if that's truly the case) ask to read one? Why waste their time? Especially given how innundated company's are with submissions.

What's that all about? :confused:<<

Sometimes, especially if you're at a company with a really narrow mandate, you just want to read a script that's different. I've agreed to read scripts pretty much knowing that they wouldn't work for my company, but there was something that appealed to me personally. Maybe you just want to see what the writer will do with the material and then if it's amazing, you'd try and push it on your own as a side project. Lots of reasons. I was just trying to make the point that folks trying to break in should probably focus on removing obstacles rather than creating them.

[billtei]

Yeah, dramas are a very hard sell. Most - in fact, nearly all - dramas that see the screen are novel adaptations or indies.

I don't write dramas. I think I came up with the secret, though. Does someone fall in love? It's a romance. Does someone chase someone else, or maybe fire a gun? You got yourself a thriller.

It's mischevious, but it might work.

Hmmm not a bad idea

[GreatOz]

Hmmm not a bad ideaI recently had a producer pass on a script of mine because it didn't have enough "sense of danger" to work as a thriller.

Which is a strange thing to say...considering it was a romantic comedy.

It's funny how people see in things what they want to see.

[LIMAMA]

I recently had a producer pass on a script of mine because it didn't have enough "sense of danger" to work as a thriller.

Which is a strange thing to say...considering it was a romantic comedy.

It's funny how people see in things what they want to see.

LOL!

I am very explicit about my teen/adult sex comedy. I tell them it is broad, bawdy, rowdy, ribald, you name it. If you don't like that type of "in your groin" comedy, why on earth would you agree to read it? I had one idiot say to me that it was "too rough" for him!!

[thatcomedian]

LOL!

I am very explicit about my teen/adult sex comedy. I tell them it is broad, bawdy, rowdy, ribald, you name it. If you don't like that type of "in your groin" comedy, why on earth would you agree to read it? I had one idiot say to me that it was "too rough" for him!!
You would of thought that the title "In Your Groin" would have clued him in that it was going to be rough;)

[trujosh]

not at all. studios rarely look for drama for oscar purposes.
they say yes only when a star brings it in and they want to make them happy, so he or she can star in their next blokbuster.


may both reasons. independent companies may find it easier to get investor money if they had a picture that was at least nominated for an oscar.




nikee, I said STUDIOS, not prodcos. totally different beasts.



.

[THEUGLYDUCKLING]

actually posting someone's name on the internet is not taboo, but i wouldn't do this.

peace

[Big Bad]

Pitched Derek Hoffman at The Donners' Company over the phone and he agreed to read it. I signed the release about a month ago and just got back their response. I'm actually impressed that they provided some coverage:

Bill,
We are going to pass on West Bank. I think you have some good ideas, but the characters were lacking for me. I wanted to see more of the secondary characters, namely Iyad and Leila, developed more. The didn't stand out as real people. And Ben's self admitted corny jokes took away from serious information he was giving. I think the backdrop is a hard one, because it demands a lot from your story, and I just didn't feel it.
Thanks for thinking of us, and good luck with it.

Best,

Derek Hoffman

Is it out of the question to make the changes he suggested and submit it again?

[RGF]

A "Pass" usually means a "Pass" forever. If they were interested in reading it again after improvements, they would have invited a resubmit in their letter....or they would have taken it under development for themselves. They're not interested.

[TheMonkeyofSpec]

Can anyone PM their email addy structure to me? I would be grateful. :D

Thanks.

[Trutopian]

I even had one gatekeeper say something to the effect of "we don't want anything too heavy, with the way the economy is, war going on" etc.

Given the subject matter as gleaned from the title (WEST BANK) and Isreal's current decimation of Gaza, I don't think we need another war story! You're better off waiting for the situation to resolve before pitching this again. The exec's comments went far beyond a "rough pass" since he/she/it actually commented on character development, or rather the lack of same. Perhaps that's something to work on?

[SBScript]

Given the subject matter as gleaned from the title (WEST BANK) and Isreal's current decimation of Gaza, I don't think we need another war story! You're better off waiting for the situation to resolve before pitching this again. The exec's comments went far beyond a "rough pass" since he/she/it actually commented on character development, or rather the lack of same. Perhaps that's something to work on?

Can we please keep the political editorial out of it?

[Code7Films]

God Bless Israel and the IDF... :D

[Trutopian]

Can we please keep the political editorial out of it?

Excuse me for living in a war-ravaged world in which no one wishes to actually CARE! Seems to me that THE WEST BANK should ONLY be sent to prodcos who have previously shown their vast corporate cruelty. Perhaps we writers should simply AVOID all "troublesome" subject matter in future?

Why are people DYING over there if we can't WRITE about it?