MADHOUSE Commentary

[Fortean]

LA MORT D'UNE HAMADRYADE

In Ancient Greece and in many cultures, spirits inhabit trees, and, the death of each one would mean the death of its spirit. In the modern world, trees are cut down with little regard beyond their value as a commodity. This is a brief reflection upon the fact that trees are living things and upon how ancient views of forests contrast with the modern view.

I would film this short of mine with either Eyemo or Bolex cameras, (both able to vary their speeds and do time-lapse), with a few cameras fixed on tripods, for day and night shoots, the perspective of a scene could be maintained to double-expose black and white film onto colour film. By filming Leuce at night, with black and white film, her appearance would remain white with variations from solidity to near invisibility, depending upon the lighting. Double-exposing this black and white, in the film lab, over daytime colour film would give her a ghostly appearance. With the camera fixed in the same position in the day and again at night, the perspective would be able to match the daytime scenery with Leuce’s nightime movements.

With no dialog and a simple musical track (http://www.resologist.net/Hamadryade.mid), the main budgetary expenses would be film stock and film lab costs. With the exceptions of time-lapse filming of clouds and the shots of the Moon and Sun, the shoot could be done in one day and, preferably, one moonless night. Here's how I'd handle some shots:

Leuce scampers down a path and disappears from sight, from moment to moment, behind thick trees and large boulders.

Edit to capture Leuce running behind trees and boulders without emerging from their other side.

With an unnatural speed, Leuce dashes from tree to tree, and peers out, from under their shelter, with a fearful curiosity.

Film with undercranking, to speed up Leuce’s actions.

Leuce retreats down an open trail, through the glen. Her movements become unnaturally slow, and she flickers from a ghostly state to invisibility. Pain wracks her body. She staggers upon legs, with no sign of her having any feet.

Film the trail in daylight, with colour film; and, again, at night with black and white film, using a white light upon Leuce, and overcranking would produce slow-motion.

Leuce vanishes and reappears. Each time, she raises her arms up in pleadings to large trees, to the Moon, and to the Sun.

Three or four quick over-lapping dissolves, film Leuce at night with black and white film, and trees, Moon, and Sun, during the day.

Spinning clouds provide the backdrop of Leuce's dizzy faint. Black blood splutters from her mouth, as she struggles to reach the agonizing object in the middle of her back, which cannot be seen despite her semi-transparency.

Time-lapse of clouds with a very slow pan of the sky, during the day; and, at night, film Leuce on black and white film. Double-exposed, the clouds would race in a spin about Leuce.

[dpaterso]

I'll just piggy back this onto Fortean's formidable post, that way I'll hopefully appear more intellectual.

Here are some casual comments I scribbled while reading the submissions and deciding which ones to vote for. Some damn good entries! As always this is my humble opinion, what the hell do I know, etc.

LA MORT D'UNE HAMADRYADE

Too darn clever for me! The script and music suggested un hommage to short films of the very early 20th century. Fascinating yet curiously uninvolving. The old axe-in-the-back cliché, eh?

IT'S THE WATER!

Good visual read, tho' it felt like a feature length film crammed into 6 pages. Maybe that's not a bad thing. Just misses a vote.

FLYPAPER MAN

Cute stuff, and an ending that suggests it might not be over yet, which gets a vote.

THE MYSTERIOUS MONSTERS OF MIDDLESEX COUNTY

Definitely had its moments -- however the crazy guy's appearance at the end was a little anticlimactic.

ATSHEN

Good mood and atmosphere, gets a vote.

EPHRAIM BRUDER

Nice build-up but slightly confusing X-Files ending, what with Ephraim being imprisoned and the suits doing whatever they do.

BECOMING

Very nicely told Tales of the Crypt-ish skit, split-hair decision, just missed out on a vote.

SEX DOLL

Good stuff with a Twilight Zone-ish twist, would have got a vote if others hadn't pushed in rudely.

RUSALKA

Great mood and atmosphere, but morphs into something of an acid trip, for this reader anyway.

THE HORROR FROM BEYOND

It's corny all right! You suck!

THE FIGURE

Good read -- no idea what the Figure is or where he comes from, though. Regardless of which, gets a vote.

THE HORSE BENEATH HIM

Good horror story, maybe needs shuffled around a little, and the ending sucks, but an interesting read nonetheless.

JUST A QUICK THANK-YOU NOTE

Oh come on! You suck!

-Derek

[Signal30]

IT'S THE WATER!

Good visual read, tho' it felt like a feature length film crammed into 6 pages. Maybe that's not a bad thing. Just misses a vote.
Nope, no argument there... that's exactly what I was doing (although there's no rest of the story). Might be something I expand on a few pages down the road, though.

THE HORSE BENEATH HIM

Good horror story, maybe needs shuffled around a little, and the ending sucks, but an interesting read nonetheless.

I got a kick out of the ending of that one... sorta saw it coming (I mean, the title sorta points it out), but really enjoyed the apple metaphor.

[IndieMe]

I voted for Becoming first.
Thought it was well written, different and creepy.

Flypaper was second.
It felt like a real Halloween story to me.

Third was the Horse Beneath Him.
I don't care what others say, but I liked the ending!

And lastly, I think I know who gave me that one sole vote! I love you!!!
I'm sending you a Stripogram that'll blow you away, a cruise to anywhere in the world you want to go, a Veyron and I'll produce a script of yours at your chosing! ;) :D :love:

[doubler83]

Fortean, are you actually going to shoot your short? Just that on another thread I saw you make reference to your 'own film project'.

If so, very cool.

[jeffkantoku]

RUSALKA

Great mood and atmosphere, but morphs into something of an acid trip, for this reader anyway.

-Derek

Thanks for the read. Because of the short length of the script I was concerned that the ending monster appearance would be too sudden and abrupt. And it wasn't foreshadowed too strongly beforehand.

glad you liked the setting. I really tried to convey the contrast between the dark murky enclosed swampland and the hovering/floating luminous orbs in the story.

The story had a Slavic mythology influence because the mail-order bride was supposed to have brought over her beliefs with her from her homeland.

Rusalka, the woman spectre was based on the Rusalka of Slavic mythology.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusalka

The unbaptized baby/viperfish thing was based on a few things.

the bolotianyk (swamp demon), who lures people into swamps.

http://www.encyclopediaofukraine.com/pages/D/E/Demonology.htm

the way it makes noises/ and cries like a baby to lure things into the swamp.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bukavac

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drekavac

I tried to capture the feel of a dark murky Slavic swampland monster while adding the luminous lures of deep-sea fish like the creepy-looking viperfish.

http://images.google.ca/images?hl=en&q=viperfish

[12IronMonkeys]

THE FIGURE

Good read -- no idea what the Figure is or where he comes from, though. Regardless of which, gets a vote.

-Derek

Thanks for the vote.

I'm a believer that not everything always needs to be explained, especially in a horror short.

[Adam Isaac]

BULLY MINE was the entry I wrote for MADHOUSE. It's about a quiet 9 year old kid(just moving into this new neighborhood) with an uncanny ability for making toy monsters & figurines; who is an everyday target for a group of neighborhood bullies.


After the DEREKS, I'm taking the year off from hosting events/contests...I'm going to try and enter other people's contests for a change.

[mcornetto]

BULLY MINE was the entry I wrote for MADHOUSE. It's about a quiet 9 year old kid(just moving into this new neighborhood) with an uncanny ability for making toy monsters & figurines; who is an everyday target for a group of neighborhood bullies.


After the DEREKS, I'm taking the year off from hosting events/contests...I'm going to try and enter other people's contests for a change.

So when do we get to read it, mate?


I think you've definitely earned a break. You've done a great job hosting.

[Fortean]

Fortean, are you actually going to shoot your short? Just that on another thread I saw you make reference to your 'own film project'.

If so, very cool.

I write my screenplays with the idea of being able to actually film them. I do not have any plans, at present to produce either of my entries to this exercise; but, LA MORT D'UNE HAMADRYADE wouldn't cost very much to make, (on film, not video).

I had hoped to complete a feature film project this month, (to meet a film festival submission deadline); however, other things cropped up and didn't leave me with the spare time needed to complete the project. Thus, I'd expect to have plenty of time to complete the work for next year's deadline, with time to spare to orchestrate more of its soundtrack.

I'd indicate that, as a "silent film," (with dialog appearing upon intertitles), it needs a music and effects soundtrack, (as film festivals don't usually provide musicians to play the musical scores, and it would go directly to DVD for distribution). Originally, I considered only a piano score. Over time, I have accumulated several orchestra scores and have learned how to create new arrangements. For example, when my protagonist visits a den of iniquity, (an anime festival, where he's judging a costume contest), one of the tunes in my score is George L. Cobb's "Sing Ting Ling." Originally, it was just a piano solo (http://www.resologist.net/Sing%20Ling%20Ting.mid); then, I made another simple arrangement (http://www.resologist.net/Sing%20Ling%20Ting%202.mid); and, now, I can consider an arrangement for a small orchestra (http://www.resologist.net/Sing%20Ling%20Ting%203.mid), (a work in progress, and one requiring a better computer for more instruments). My aim is to provide an experience similar to what an audience encountered in the 1920s, (when theatre pianists or bands performed a musical accompaniment to the film from a compiled score). I'm intentionally working with a very limited budget, so it's public domain music and my own labour to create any new arrangements that it will have.

My other screenplay ATSHEN in the Madhouse exercise was written for a Narrator to speak all the roles. Thus, it could be shot with MOS cameras and without sound equipment to record the actors speaking their lines; then, once edited together, the Narrator, (possibly an elderly voice actor), could speak in sync for the several character's voices, (avoiding any confusion in subtitles or with the unintelligble dialog for those who don't understand Inuktituk). An old favourite by Grieg (http://www.resologist.net/In%20der%20Halle%20das%20Bergkoenigs.mid) might be used for the shaking tent ceremonies and the aftermath.

[doubler83]

I write my screenplays with the idea of being able to actually film them. I do not have any plans, at present to produce either of my entries to this exercise; but, LA MORT D'UNE HAMADRYADE wouldn't cost very much to make, (on film, not video).

I had hoped to complete a feature film project this month, (to meet a film festival submission deadline); however, other things cropped up and didn't leave me with the spare time needed to complete the project. Thus, I'd expect to have plenty of time to complete the work for next year's deadline, with time to spare to orchestrate more of its soundtrack.

I'd indicate that, as a "silent film," (with dialog appearing upon intertitles), it needs a music and effects soundtrack, (as film festivals don't usually provide musicians to play the musical scores, and it would go directly to DVD for distribution). Originally, I considered only a piano score. Over time, I have accumulated several orchestra scores and have learned how to create new arrangements. For example, when my protagonist visits a den of iniquity, (an anime festival, where he's judging a costume contest), one of the tunes in my score is George L. Cobb's "Sing Ting Ling." Originally, it was just a piano solo (http://www.resologist.net/Sing%20Ling%20Ting.mid); then, I made another simple arrangement (http://www.resologist.net/Sing%20Ling%20Ting%202.mid); and, now, I can consider an arrangement for a small orchestra (http://www.resologist.net/Sing%20Ling%20Ting%203.mid), (a work in progress, and one requiring a better computer for more instruments). My aim is to provide an experience similar to what an audience encountered in the 1920s, (when theatre pianists or bands performed a musical accompaniment to the film from a compiled score). I'm intentionally working with a very limited budget, so it's public domain music and my own labour to create any new arrangements that it will have.

My other screenplay ATSHEN in the Madhouse exercise was written for a Narrator to speak all the roles. Thus, it could be shot with MOS cameras and without sound equipment to record the actors speaking their lines; then, once edited together, the Narrator, (possibly an elderly voice actor), could speak in sync for the several character's voices, (avoiding any confusion in subtitles or with the unintelligble dialog for those who don't understand Inuktituk). An old favourite by Grieg (http://www.resologist.net/In%20der%20Halle%20das%20Bergkoenigs.mid) might be used for the shaking tent ceremonies and the aftermath.

This is very, very cool. Good luck with it!

Sorry for hijacking the thread. Back to normal business. :)