V'Day 2012 contest entries

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • V'Day 2012 contest entries

    V.D. standing of course for Valentine's Day. For more info on this fun challenge, see here.

    Entry titles will be added here as they're received and posted:

    THE BOX
    DATING THE DEAD
    THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT URSULA

    Feb 15 edit: looks like a distinct lack of entries this time around! Maybe the February ScriptFever challenge happening at the same time has siphoned off a couple of folks who might otherwise have shown up for the V.D. challenge. No worries, life happens, what can ya do. Karl/Road Warrior may post further thoughts on this [see here]. Thanks to those who wrote something. Writing practice never goes to waste!

    Entrants should totally check out their scripts in case of any admin errors. PM me if you see any problems so I can make corrections.

    Once all entries are in, please read 'em and vote for your 1st, 2nd and 3rd choices. PM these to me, preferably in the format,

    1st - title
    2nd - title
    3rd - title

    Note, you can't vote for your own entry. It's assumed that everyone would do this anyway.

    Thanks for taking part, through writing, voting, or both!
    Last edited by dpaterso; 02-16-2012, 01:11 AM.

  • #2
    Re: V.D. contest entries

    THE BOX

    ...Removed as per author request
    Last edited by dpaterso; 02-20-2012, 11:25 PM.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: V.D. contest entries

      DATING THE DEAD (1 of 2)

      Code:
                     FADE IN:
      
                     Rain beats down on this small shanty town...
      
                     EXT. WILLIE'S HOUSE - MORNING
      
                     A weatherboarded shed with blistering walls.  Two plant pots, 
                     the contents withered and sad, sit either side of the red 
                     front door as though gesturing to cheer it up, they don't... 
      
                                           WILLIE (V.O.)
                               We moved here from Boston, my dad 
                               said it was going to be like 
                               Nirvana...
      
                     The door CLICKS... 
      
                     Meet Willie Frightkin... 
      
                     We immediately get that he's a nervous kid, 22, or 
                     thereabouts, pale and thin.   
      
                     After glancing up at the weather he flips his hoodie up and 
                     sets off for town. 
      
                                           WILLIE (V.O.)
                               At least there's the internet cafe 
                               on Main.
      
                     Willie extends his hand and catches a few rain drops.  He 
                     turns his fingers over and rubbing between thumb and 
                     forefinger, we see the rain runs black... 
      
                                           WILLIE (V.O.)
                               That's where I first met Ursula.
      
                     Willie turns onto the main drag, stepping over a huge puddle 
                     framing a rippling and ugly face, Willie looks up and sees 
                     the CRAZY PREACHER... 
      
                     EXT. MAIN STREET - TOWN - 5 MINUTES LATER
      
                     Willie watches the sky ahead, it hangs over the town like a 
                     dark shroud.  Red rays strike though the black and purple 
                     cloud line today.  Willie shivers, and crosses the road where 
                     he passes under an old sign: 
      
                     "WELCOME TO MORDANT"
      
                     Ahead of him is "The I-Cafe".  The only bright sign on this 
                     street, glowing like a beacon in neon.
      
                                           WILLIE (V.O.)
                               Stick with me.  I'll show you around.
      
                     INT. INTERNET CAFE - MOMENT LATER
      
                     Various kids, many with their hoods pulled up, engrossed in 
                     contacting the outside world, lines of computers, kids welded 
                     to screens, message boards, friends in distant and glamorous 
                     towns, dreams, endless CLICKING...
      
                     Willie frames the doorway, wet-through, he looks the place 
                     over.  Tables, scattered chairs, old pop bottles, exploded 
                     packets of crisps, directly in his line of sight a calendar 
                     hangs limply on the wall... "February", the days aggressively 
                     crossed-out to the 13th by thick black marker.
      
                                           WILLIE (V.O.)
                               Never a good day, for anything...
      
                     Willie is yanked out of his thoughts as a kid turns and pulls 
                     his hood back: GRANT CAESAR, 24, blue eyes, a huge smiling 
                     mouth surrounded by acne, sporting a beard which he grooms 
                     continually between thumb and forefinger.  
      
                                           GRANT
                               Willie, dude!
      
                                           WILLIE (V.O.)
                               This is my only friend.  Grant Caesar.  
                               That's not his surname, he just uses 
                               it to distinguish himself, or so he 
                               says.  
      
                     Willie nonchalantly walks away from Grant embarrassed by the 
                     sudden sole attention from the entire room.  But the CLICKING 
                     of the keyboards soon continues and he's forgotten.
      
                                           GRANT
                               Willie.  Wait.  
      
                     Willie looks back at the room to mark whose listening to 
                     Grant's mouth.  The eyes are all on screens, vacant, blank.  
                     A touch scary, zombie-people.
      
                                           WILLIE
                                    (fixes Grant)
                               Let's get some air. 
      
                     EXT. MAIN STREET - LATER
      
                     Willie kicking a can, trying to keep it in the gutter, it 
                     shines like a fallen star, it's the only bright object in a 
                     grey street, sky, town...
      
                     Grant is walking with purpose.  Seemingly agitated.
      
                                           GRANT
                               Got some breaking news, dude, I don't 
                               know how to start.    
      
                                           WILLIE (V.O.)
                               Grant speaks like this, you'd think 
                               he was CNN.  I want to ask him if 
                               his sister is pregnant, again, instead 
                               I say- 
      
                                           WILLIE
                               Just lay it on me.   
      
                     The crazy preacher is on the opposite sidewalk. 
      
                                           PREACHER
                               God will place his hand upon them 
                               and they will become dust!
      
                     Willie exchanges a nervous look with grant.  
      
                                           GRANT
                               ... well, I've found another, last 
                               Monday, there's at least seven of 
                               them now, the town's being overrun.  
      
                                           WILLIE
                               How can you tell it's another?
      
                                           GRANT
                               By how they look, dress, smile.
      
                                           WILLIE
                               Maybe it's because I'm an outsider 
                               that I can't spot them Grant.
      
                     Grant stops and stares at Willie. 
      
                                           GRANT
                               Listen Will... you've got to finish 
                               with Ursula.
      
                                                                        CUT TO:  
      
                     EXT. CHURCHYARD - LATE AFTERNOON.
      
                     The sky is even darker, no reds now.  Willie sits on a 
                     gravestone.  Grant is watching him, grooming his beard.  
      
                                           WILLIE
                               Every night?
      
                                           GRANT
                                    (softly)
                               Six nights in a row.  After midnight.  
                               Same grave.  
                                    (Grant points)
                               and then, disappears...who knows 
                               where?  It's something about death, 
                               it attracts them.
      
                     Willie looks away.  Appears to be talking to himself.  
      
                                           WILLIE
                               We did that weird couple thing, you 
                               know, new couples do all sorts of 
                               weird things and anyway we did the 
                               one where we tried to find our pulses.
      
                                           GRANT
                               So...
      
                                           WILLIE
                               I couldn't find hers.  
      
                     INT. THE 'ZOMBIE BAR' AKA FRANKIES - TOWN - LATER
      
                     The only bar in town that keeps a fire burning in the day.  
                     This accounts for some of the customers, but not all. Willie 
                     sits opposite Ursula.  They've been arguing. 
      
                                           URSULA
                               So based upon what Grant says, you 
                               want to finish with me?
      
                                           WILLIE
                                    (nervous)
                               I never said that. 
      
                                           URSULA
                               You said something that sounded a 
                               lot like that.  When I pushed you 
                               also mentioned that other thing. 
      
                     Silence.  Willie stares out the window, he can just see the 
                     preacher at the edge of town, standing in the rain, shouting 
                     at passing cars... 
      
                                           WILLIE
                                    (distantly)
                               Look, you've been acting quite strange 
                               recently Ursula, remote.  Not like 
                               your old self.  
      
                                           URSULA
                               I'm not one of them.  Willie, look 
                               at me, I'm warm, my cheeks are red.
      
                     She turns Willie's chin towards her in her hand.  
      
                      
      
                                           URSULA
                                    (whispering))
                               I'm not 'dead' Willie, that's absurd, 
                               Grant is just jealous, he wants you 
                               to himself, don't you see? 
      
                     Silence.  The tone changes.  Ursula smiles.  Willie softly 
                     enfolds her hand and kisses it. 
      
                                           URSULA
                               Are we still meeting for Valentine's 
                               at the Tipsy Cat? 
      
                     Willie kissing, glances up and smiles.
      
                                           WILLIE
                               Sure are.  I've got a surprise Ursula, 
                               something special.  
      
                     Ursula glances down.  
      
                     INT. URSULA'S BEDROOM - NIGHT.
      
                     Ursula lying face down on her bed flicking cards... as we 
                     move in closer we see they are tarot cards.  She smiles to 
                     herself as the last card falls... we glide away towards her  
                     bedside table, on it sits a miniature coffin. 
      
                     EXT. GRAVEYARD - 11.51PM - NIGHT
      
                     Grant sipping from his styrofoam coffee cup... little curls 
                     of steam rise off it.  He sits on a blue sleeping bag.  
      
                     Out of the dark, footsteps, padding softly, Grant's eyes 
                     widen, then his face relaxes... Willie appears out of the 
                     mist carrying a small bag of doughnuts.  He hands the bag to 
                     Grant without speaking.   
      
                     EXT. CHURCHYARD - 12.15AM
      
                     Willie lying close to Grant, sniper-style, shadowed by a 
                     large white family tomb.  A street lamps glow falls across 
                     the graves, now the rain has stopped the mist is swirling. 
      
                                           WILLIE
                                    (whispering)
                               It's gone quarter past, she's not 
                               coming Grant.
      
                                           GRANT
                               Sssshhh.  Pass me another doughnut.  
      
                     EXT. CHURCHYARD - 12.34AM
      
                     Grant nodding-off.  Willie alert. 
      
                                           WILLIE
                               Grant... she's here! 
      
                     Grant's eyes snap open. They both watch a figure dressed 
                     like Ursula standing by a grave.  Willie is frozen. 
      
                     EXT. GRAVE SIDE - LATER
      
                     Willie and Grant staring down on the grave.  
      
                                           GRANT
                               Know them?
      
                                           WILLIE
                               Not personally.  
      
                     INT. MOTHER TOOKOO'S SHACK - EDGE OF TOWN - FRIDAY 14TH 
                     FEBRUARY - DAWN
      
                     A room full of stuffed animals and empty bottles, coloured 
                     glass of all shades.  Willie's face is determined.  
      
                                           MOTHER TOOKOO
                               Once you've undergone this ceremony 
                               you will never be able to return to 
                               us.  We've been here for two hours 
                               now and you still wish to join them?  
      
                                           WILLIE
                               It's what I most want...  
      
                                           MOTHER TOOKOO
                               You will be dead to the living but 
                               will walk in the light. 
      
                                           WILLIE
                               Please Mother Tookoo...  it wont  
                               make any difference in this town.
      
                                           MOTHER TOOKOO
                               And your heart demands it.
      
                                           WILLIE
                               My heart demands it.
      CONTINUED IN NEXT POST

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: V.D. contest entries

        DATING THE DEAD (2 of 2)

        CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS POST
        Code:
                       INT. THE TIPSY CAT - 7.00PM - FEBRUARY 14TH - VALENTINE'S 
                       DAY
        
                       Willie sits at a table nervously.  He watches the waiters 
                       who pass by him and smiles nervously up at them.  He keeps 
                       moving a small red box around the table cloth, placing it 
                       inside the decorative squares in turn. 
        
                       The door opens and Ursula sweeps in and in a moment is seated 
                       opposite Willie.  She sighs- 
        
                                             URSULA
                                 Sorry I'm late Willie, I've been so 
                                 busy.
        
                       Willie's nervousness seems to magnify. 
        
                                             URSULA
                                 I've got to say something, I've been--
        
                                             WILLIE
                                 No, it's okay, no confessions, I 
                                 understand.  I'm okay with it.
        
                                             URSULA
                                 With what?
        
                                             WILLIE
                                 With whatever it is.  I know you're... 
                                 one of them Ursula... and it's okay. 
        
                       Ursula looks into her lap for a long time and then she slowly 
                       raises her head and fixes her dark eyes on Willie.  After a 
                       waiter deposits a glass of water on the table and leaves, 
                       Ursula begins. 
        
                                             URSULA
                                      (sombre)
                                 There are a few of us in this town... 
                                 we're tolerated, for the most part, 
                                 but I'm not with them anymore.
                                      (she smiles)
                                 I went to Mother Tookoo last night.  
                                 I've undertaken the ceremony, I'm 
                                 with the living now, I only had one 
                                 chance, like everyone, I will grow 
                                 old now and die, I gave up my 
                                 immortality, Willie,
                                      (her eyes glisten)
                                 ... for you.
        
                       Willie reels, he grabs for the table cloth screwing it up 
                       into a knot in his fist.
        
                       Ursula stares around, nervous, worried by all the attention, 
                       she grabs him.  Willie's eyes roll in his face. 
        
                                             URSULA
                                 What's up sweetie, I thought you'd 
                                 be happy, please Willie, what's wrong?
        
                       Ursula notices the red box, we can tell she knows what's 
                       inside it.  The ring.  The diamond cluster Willie pointed to 
                       in the jeweler's window last month. 
        
                                             WILLIE
                                      (struggling)
                                 I went to Mother Tookoo.   
        
                       Ursula's warm red cheeks drain.
        
                                             URSULA
                                 No.
        
                                             WILLIE
                                 I took the ceremony.  Feel.
        
                       Ursula slowly reaches across the table and places her hand 
                       over Willie's wrist, and then looks up into his eyes.
        
                                             URSULA
                                 You're... you... did this for me?
        
                                             WILLIE
                                      (smiles)
                                 Yeah.
        
                                             URSULA
                                      (vaguely, listless)
                                 The living and the dead can never be 
                                 together.
        
                                             WILLIE
                                 What's that?
        
                                             URSULA
                                 Mother Tookoo's words.    
        
                       A waiter with dark eyes, hollow eyes, walks up to the table, 
                       smiling at Ursula, just like he knows her.  He places a red 
                       rose inside a glass vase, and slowly retreats.  They look 
                       back at each other over the top of the rose.
        
                                             WILLIE
                                 What now? 
        
                                             URSULA
                                      (smiling)
                                 Willie... I've never dated the dead 
                                 before.  I always preferred the 
                                 living.  
        
                                             THE END.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: V.D. contest entries

          THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT URSULA

          Code:
                 FADE IN:
          
                 EXT. CEMETERY - NIGHT
          
                 A wrought-iron sign, MORDANT CEMETERY, over stone pillars.
          
                 Camera moves through the sign, which busts apart, just like
                 in that old B/W movie made by that guy.
          
                 Tracking a WOMAN wearing a long coat who enters the cemetery.
          
                 Her high heels click on the slab path that winds between a
                 sea of tombstones.  She walks with a slow, measured step.
          
                 She's the only person in the cemetery.
          
                 Except for...
          
                 HIDING IN THE BUSHES
          
                 Just a pair of eyes visible, wide with fear, watching.
          
                 AMONG THE TOMBSTONES
          
                 The woman slows as she examines various tombstones.
          
                 IN THE BUSHES
          
                 A digital camera, held by shaky hands.
          
                 AMONG THE TOMBSTONES
          
                 Finally the woman stops at a particular grave, her back to
                 us.
          
                 IN THE BUSHES
          
                 The digital camera CLICKS
          
                 AMONG THE TOMBSTONES
          
                 The woman straightens -- turns her head -- looks over her
                 shoulder.  Her eyes narrow.  She heard it.
          
                 This is URSULA.  Possessing a cold beauty that might be
                 described as otherworldly, if the person doing the describing
                 was high on meth.
          
                 IN THE BUSHES
          
                 The photographer scrambles back, movements dictated by his
                 growing terror.  This is GRANT.  Doomed to forever be a nerd,
                 and probably a virgin too, until he dies alone in front of a
                 widescreen TV watching nude cheerleaders making love.
          
                 Grant gets up and runs away as if demons from Hell were
                 chasing him.  He clutches the digital camera to his chest.
          
                 AMONG THE TOMBSTONES
          
                 Ursula ignores the distraction and returns her attention to
                 the tombstone at which she stands.
          
                 She seems to address the tombstone... or whoever rests here.
          
                                       URSULA
                           Tell me everything you know.
          
          
                 EXT. TIPSY CAT RESTAURANT - DAY
          
                 It's morning so the place is empty of customers.
          
                 WILLIE, a young man of dubious dress sense, is with KITTY
                 the restaurant's owner.  Kitty is one of those women who
                 appear in movies who are witty, intelligent, and incredibly
                 attractive, yet somehow remain single.
          
                 Willie opens a ring box, showing Kitty the diamond ring
                 inside.  Kitty gasps, as women sometimes do when they see a
                 diamond ring.
          
                                       KITTY
                           Oh my God, it's beautiful.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           You think she'll like it?
          
                                       KITTY
                           I really do.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           The flowers, what if they wilt in
                           the kitchen?  It's hot in there.
          
                                       KITTY
                           I'll keep 'em in the fridge.  Don't
                           worry about it, everything's going
                           to be fine.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           Sorry, just a little nervous.
          
                                       KITTY
                           I guess it's not every day you propose
                           to someone.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           No, no it is not.
          
                                       KITTY
                           Are you sure about this girl, Willie?
          
                                       WILLIE
                           Sure I'm sure, why would you, why do
                           you say that?
          
                                       KITTY
                           There's just something about her, I
                           don't know.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           You know her?
          
                                       KITTY
                           Not personally, no.  I know of her.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           What does, you know "of" her, meaning
                           what?
          
                                       KITTY
                           Just what people say.  Some people.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           Well what do some people say?  You
                           can't just say something like that
                           and let it go.  Are you telling me
                           she's a slut?
          
                                       KITTY
                           No, I didn't say she's a slut.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           Just how many boyfriends has she
                           had?  One?  Two?  Sixty-seven?
          
                                       KITTY
                           How should I know?  All I'm asking
                           is, just how sure are you?  Any time
                           you talk about her, you're vague.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           I'm not vague.
          
                                       KITTY
                           How long have you known her?
          
                                       WILLIE
                           God.  Why would you even ask that
                           question?  I've known her, all my
                           life, it seems.
          
                                       KITTY
                           You're right, you're not vague.
                           It's gonna be fine.  All you have to
                           do is turn up.  And make sure she
                           turns up, too.
          
                 Willie's cell phone plays a dinky tune, Willie smiles an
                 apology to Kitty and fumbles to answer it.
          
                                       WILLIE (INTO PHONE)
                           Where the hell have you been?
          
          
                 INT. GRANT'S CAR, IN A PARKING LOT - DAY
          
                 Willie and Grant.  Willie fiddles with the digital camera,
                 thumbing through pictures on the LCD screen.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           You hid in the church all night?
          
                                       GRANT
                           I'm sorry, I'm not as strong as you.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           You're an atheist.
          
                                       GRANT
                           That doesn't mean I can't believe in
                           God when I need him.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           You're sure it was her?
          
                                       GRANT
                           I waited for two hours, in the bushes,
                           things crawled into my mouth, she
                           was the only other person there.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           I'm not seeing her.
          
                                       GRANT
                           That's what I'm telling you.  She
                           doesn't take pictures.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           Now you're just being stupid.
          
                                       GRANT
                           She's a ghoul, a creature of the
                           night.
          
                                       WILLIE
                           Now you're being really stupid.
          
                                       GRANT
                           Am I?  AM I?  Why don't you ask her
                           yourself?  Why am I crawling around
                           in dirt taking pictures of tombstones?
                           Why don't you just ASK HER, DAMMIT!
          
                                       WILLIE
                           I will.
          
          
                 INT. URSULA'S STUDIO - DAY
          
                 Chic, well furnished.  Ursula sits at a table facing
                 GRANDMOTHER (70s) and SKEPTICAL GRANDSON (30s).  Ursula deals
                 Tarot cards.  Every time she turns a card over she pauses
                 and seems to consider what it might mean.
          
                                       GRANDMOTHER
                           I hope you don't mind my grandson
                           being here.  He insisted.
          
                                       URSULA
                           It doesn't affect me at all.  As
                           long as you're comfortable with it.
          
                                       SKEPTICAL GRANDSON
                           I just wanted to make sure Grammy is
                           getting value for money.  Since she
                           seems to give you enough of it.
          
                                       URSULA
                           Perhaps you'd like me to demonstrate?
          
                                       SKEPTICAL GRANDSON
                           Oh, I really would like to see that.
          
                                       URSULA
                           I'm not reading for your grandmother,
                           Mr. Hutchison.
          
                                       SKEPTICAL GRANDSON
                           What?
          
                                       URSULA
                           These cards are for you.  Would you
                           like to know what they tell me?
          
                                       SKEPTICAL GRANDSON
                           Oh boy, yes.
          
                                       URSULA
                           Let's skip school and college, and
                           the accountancy exam you cheated in.
                           You've been married twice.  Both
                           marriages ended in divorce.  You
                           have no children, and never will
                           have any.  You should get your sperm
                           count checked.  Your career is about
                           to take an unexpected turn.  They're
                           going to find out about the missing
                           funds.  Putting the account in your
                           first wife's name, not clever enough.
          
                                       SKEPTICAL GRANDSON
                           WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?
          
                                       URSULA
                           The cards never lie, Andy.  You've
                           been a cheat and a liar and an abusive
                           creep all your life.  Karma has caught
                           up with you.
          
                 Skeptical Grandson angrily shoves his chair back and stands.
                 He glares down at Ursula, who meets his gaze calmly.  He
                 storms out, slamming the door.  His Grandmother flinches.
          
                                       URSULA
                           I'm sorry about that.
          
                                       GRANDMOTHER
                           It's me who should be apologizing.
          
                 Grandmother smiles and leans forward.
          
                                       GRANDMOTHER
                           Are there any new messages for me?
          
                 END OF PARTIAL SCRIPTMENT

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: V.D. contest entries

            The entrants were (highlight text to see):

            THE BOX - DangoForth
            DATING THE DEAD - The Road Warrior
            THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT URSULA - dpaterso

            Comment

            Working...
            X