Song lyrics in dialogue?

[Conz]

I'm fleshing out a screenplay idea that will involve a band, and I've never really read a script with singing in it. Can someone show me and example, or give me an idea on how to go about doing it?

Say I have an entire musical performance, do I just block the whole song in a long piece of dialogue, or do i break it up with action? Hpw do I do that without making it look like long gaps in the actual singing?

thanks.

[Mac H.]

Originally Posted by Conz

I'm fleshing out a screenplay idea that will involve a band, and I've never really read a script with singing in it. Can someone show me and example, or give me an idea on how to go about doing it?

Say I have an entire musical performance, do I just block the whole song in a long piece of dialogue, or do i break it up with action? Hpw do I do that without making it look like long gaps in the actual singing?

thanks.

I'd just say that how they sing it, and then maybe give a few lines to give the flavour. Here's a TV example for guitar playing for an old sci-fi trope ... telling which of two identical people is an alien clone and which is genuine:

  LISTER 1 starts playing the guitar. It is a superb display of
  axemanship. (If we could get some guitar diva to crouch
  behind Lister and be his arms, ecstasy.) After about fifteen
  seconds of astonishing virtuosity, the music builds to a 
  crescendo and ends. 

  As the last chord dies away, KRYTEN and CAT hit LISTER 1
  with volley after volley of bazookoid fire. The INSECTOID PSIREN
  writhes and screeches on the floor.

                  LISTER 2
         How did you know that wasn't me?

                  CAT
         'Cause that dude could play.

                  LISTER 2
         He wasn't any better than me.

                  KRYTEN
         That's how you _believe_ you play,
         sir. That's why, when the Psiren 
         read your mind, he shared your 
         delusion that you are not a ten-
         thumbed, tone-deaf, talentless
         noise polluter.

                  LISTER
         Are you seriously saying you think
         he was better than me?

  LISTER picks up the guitar and starts playing. It's terrible.

                  LISTER
         What's the difference? If anything,
         this is slightly better.

                  CAT
         A little survival tip, bud. Never play
         your guitar in front of a man with a
         loaded gun.

                  LISTER
         I resent this. I resent you saving my
         life in this way. I won't forget this.

Here's an example from 'Jerry McGuire' :

              EXT. DOROTHY'S BACKYARD -- DAY
 
              Rod Tidwell sings Marvin Gaye's "What's Going On" at the
              wedding for assorted guests gathered here in the backyard.
              Contrary to his own belief, Rod is not a gifted singer.  In
              the wedding band, standing on a small stage in the corner,
              are Chad and Dooler.

Both scripts basically gives a summary of what the audience experiences - in the 'Red Dwarf' example it was telling how good the playing was. Here it is showing us that Rod isn't particularly good.

Or you could just give a little excerpt - The 'Pirates of the Caribbean' script had some singing in it:

  EXT. ISLET – BEACH – LATER – NIGHT

  A fire BLAZES. Jack and Elizabeth, bottles in hand, are 
  roaring drunk, arm in arm, singing the song all the way up 
  to the stars –-

                  JACK/ELIZABETH 
         We're devils, we're black sheep,
         we're really bad eggs. Drink up 
         me hearties, yo ho. Yo ho, yo ho,
         a pirate's life for me! 

                  JACK
         I LOVE this song. Really bad eggs!

Good luck,

Mac

[Midnite]

Conz,

I sent you a pm...

But first, I've got to ask if these are gonna be original songs? 'Cause if you're dealing with copyrighted music, then things will get tricky, and all the formatting in the world won't save it.

Midnite

[Conz]

Originally Posted by Midnite

Conz,

I sent you a pm...

But first, I've got to ask if these are gonna be original songs? 'Cause if you're dealing with copyrighted music, then things will get tricky, and all the formatting in the world won't save it.

Midnite

shoulda checked the thread first before replying to your thread.

I know you aren't supposed to use copywritten music, and the scenes won't be dependent on certain songs, but can i say something like "Jack sings N.I.B. by Black Sabbath (or a song in a similar vein)" or is that no good? I just made that up, that's not how I write, I'm just curious.


I plan to simpy put "Add lyrics later" in dialogue, and write and input my own songs after i finish a draft.

[emily blake]

I do this a lot, and I always say something like "She sings a terrible country song" although once I did include the lyrics to Cherry Pie and nobody had a problem.

[ATB]

Check out the script Imagine by Dan Fogelman. He'll answer your question.

[Ronaldinho]

Originally Posted by Conz

I know you aren't supposed to use copywritten music, and the scenes won't be dependent on certain songs, but can i say something like "Jack sings N.I.B. by Black Sabbath (or a song in a similar vein)" or is that no good? I just made that up, that's not how I write, I'm just curious.

Can you write that?

Sure. People probably won't throw your script in the trash for that choice.

But bear in mind, please, that a lot of people reading your script won't have the slightest idea what that song is. They may know the band only by their worst caricatures. In a lot of ways, that sort of thing is simply bad writing in that it does a poor job communicating the specifics that you think you're communicating.

Beyond that, I will simply say that there is a tendency among inexperienced writers (and directors, too!) to try to have popular music communicate the emotional goals of a scene, and while that sort of thing CAN work, it often doesn't, without being excessively saccharine. And even if you're right and you've picked the perfect song to communicate that emotional space, bear in mind that reading the name (or lyrics) of the song isn't going to communicate that emotional space in the same way that actually hearing the song does.

And remember that this is the sort of thing you see often in bad amateur screenplays, and rarely in good professional ones, which suggests that there are some traps here.

[mattlohr]

Most of the conventional wisdom I've seen on screenplays says that you should never name specific songs, because you can never assume that the readers who are encountering your script for the first time know the songs you're utilizing (the example from "Jerry Maguire" is a different sort of case because my gut tells me that Cameron Crowe already has a deal in place by the time he turned in his script to the studio).

I frequently have moments in my scripts where music is being performed or listened to; music is a key part of my writing process, during both brainstorming / outlining and the actual writing process. But I never specifically put the songs I'm listening to while writing into the actual script, instead using a description that implies the type of music I'm after. (My current script, for example, has a moment when a character turns on a car radio; the station that's on is playing "edited-for-air hip hop", but I don't name the artist or the song.)

Keep in mind that once a director gets your script, he's going to put in whatever song in that style that he thinks is best / can get for the cheapest price. For example, when Zach Helm sent out his script for "Stranger Than Fiction", he included a CD of songs, along with directions within the script itself for which songs should be played when reading certain scenes. I'd have to double-check this, but I don't know if any of the songs he selected made it into the actual film. I know for sure that the big musical scene, where Will Ferrell plays guitar and sings for Maggie Gyllenhaal, used a different song that Helm suggested. The script had "Punk Rock Girl" by the Dead Milkmen. I can't remember what the hell song the movie actually used.

[Conz]

Originally Posted by ATB

Check out the script Imagine by Dan Fogelman. He'll answer your question.

thanks for recommending this. I'd heard plenty about Fogelman but never read any of his work, enjoyed this one a lot, can't wait for it to come out.

I checked out Scott Pilgrim too, that helped a bit.


Here's one more question - I'm probably not even gonna writee this in b/c it's almost become cliche, but if I wanted to do a Bohemian Rhapsody/Wayne's World type scene where 4 guys in a car all sing the same song like clowns, I can't name an existing song? writing something like "(or something similar)" in a script can't be a good idea right?

[Vance]

My own personal rule is to not name specific songs or write lyrics unless they're just too perfect to the occasion (which is extremely rare). Better to let the reader make their own connection to a favorite song by simply referring to a "head-banging thrash anthem" or "intricate love ballad". In theory, the reader will make the necessary mental jump to whatever pleases them and helps keep the flow going if you've been doing your job well enough up to that point.