The following is an in-depth post on the topic to give new writers a thorough understanding. If you’re a guest or member who doesn’t like to read long posts, then I strongly suggest that you immediately leave the thread.
FIRST TEN PAGES: WHAT READERS WANT
(Note: the following is a generalization. Depending on a writer’s artistic vision and what works for HIS story, some of the mentioned elements may not necessarily be found, or required in their own first ten pages.)
Why is it the “first ten pages” and not 8, 12 or 15?
Was it totally arbitrary because the number ten was a nice even number? Was it because of the old ten minute reels? Was it because of producer Joel Silver’s Whammo edict (action beat of some sort every ten minutes as not to bore the audience)? Or, was it because of an industry person’s experience he has found 10 pages provides enough evidence of whether or not a script has good prospects?
Whatever the reason, the first ten pages is the industry standard.
In the context of a screenplay, the first ten pages are the most important.
Yes, I know -- EVERY -- page is important, but I like to look at it this way: the first ten pages represents a script’s “curb appeal.” The more attractive it is the more appealing it is to hook a buyer and entice him to enter and look at the property further.
The first ten pages is the story’s foundation. It establishes and sets in motion the major elements: theme, world, plot, characters, genre, tone, Inciting Incident, etc.
The reason you always hear that you have to hook/grab the reader (agents, managers, producers, studio executives, etc.) by ten pages is because of volume and time.
When an industry person takes a pile of scripts home for his weekend read, he’s not gonna spend the 110 minutes it takes to read each screenplay knowing after 10 pages he’s gonna pass.
Is this fair to the writer? No, it isn’t. Is it possible an industry person may miss out on a great script because he stopped reading after 10 pages? Yes, it is.
It’s because of this possibility that there are some industry people that will read at least up to the first act.
A writer’s opening/first page is his first impression to an industry person, so hook the reader right away with a captivating opening visual, memorable dialogue, vivid description, or connect emotionally.
I suggest that the screenplay’s opening harmonizes with the story that’s about to unfold. Not be just a gimmick to hook the reader.
If possible, the opening visual will hint/express to the reader one or more of the following: genre, tone, theme and/or mood.
For example, THE CROW:
FADE IN:
EXT. CEMETERY - LATE AFTERNOON
BOOM! A crack of lightning illuminates the silhouette of a perched crow large in the f.g.
-- Within one to three pages, a reader will know, or get a hint, whether or not a writer can write. The reader will know if he’s in the hands of a professional, or an amateur.
What will tip him off are things like unoriginal voice, word choices, an abundance of unnecessary words, useless scenes, confusion, lack of craftsmanship (using tools, principles and techniques well), meandering narrative, too much backstory/exposition, cliche scenes (sometimes a cliche scene is required), etc.
Readers want to see magic happening on the pages. This is accomplished with specific narrative elements.
The important elements are the following:
VOICE
Original and distinct. Not cliche and derivative. If it’s something familiar, there’s a fresh take or unique spin.
When a new writer asks what does a “writer’s voice” mean, I’ll repeat what I’ve posted in the past:
Ask yourself this: What root sources do writers rely on to create art, i.e., worlds, characters, themes, plot, dialogue, etc.?
The writer relies on his own life experiences: his environment, family and friends’ relationships, attitude, personality, POV, world view, whether or not it was happy, humorous, sad, hurtful, loving, etc.
A writer’s voice is the “essence” of who he is.
Take for example the following comedy writers: Woody Allen, Billy Wilder, Mel Brooks, Nora Ephron, John Hughes, Ethan and Joel Coen. All successful. Why? They told stories in their own, unique voice.
I suggest for a new writer to use the search box for a thread called: “Voice (Descriptive Narrative).”
PROTAGONIST
A memorable character that grabs the reader’s attention the moment he appears on screen. A hero that’s so captivating he/she will attract a star.
Introduce the protagonist with a strong event/situation that illustrates their personality?
For example, “Pirates of the Caribbean's” introduction of Captain Jack Sparrow. “The Verdict’s” introduction of Paul Newman’s character, the alcoholic and demoralized attorney Frank Galvin. This film has some great expression of characterization. The reader sees and gets this character.
Readers look for: a vulnerability in the protagonist. Protagonist’s motivations. Complex, three-dimensional protagonist. What’s the protagonist’s goal? Need? Wants? External conflict?
What is the protagonist’s flaw? What scares him emotionally? His inner conflict?
For example, in the “The King’s Speech” the protagonist, King George VI, has a severe fear of public speaking because of a debilitating stutter.
One of the most important functions of the first ten pages is to create an emotional connection with the protagonist, having the readers become emotionally involved with what the protagonist needs to resolve, or conquer over his journey.
The reader gets hooked because of the emotional commitment. The protagonist is no longer a stranger. It’s a person the reader cares about and is motivated to keep turning the pages, wanting, hoping, the protagonist obtains his goal.
Other techniques to get a reader to care for and identify with your protagonist is the use of sympathy and empathy. (I did a thread on this titled “Creating The Anti-Hero Protagonist.” Type it in the search box and check it out.)
When possible, have the first character to appear to be the protagonist. Readers/viewers have a subconscious expectation that when they see the first character to appear in a film/screenplay, it’s the hero/protagonist of the story.
In my teen romantic comedy’s opening page, I play with this audience expectation to create an impactful surprise.
The protagonist can be introduced into the story in different ways: physical presence, named dropped in talks between other characters, in a photo, home video tape, etc.
For example, in “Cash McCall,” staring James Garner, his character didn’t appear on screen for the first 18 minutes of the film. Before then, his name was only mention in dialogue between characters and by a portrait painting done by the love interest.
When introducing the protagonist, besides his name and age, you want to paint a vivid picture as possible to express who this character IS to the audience. His essence. Use actions and/or descriptions that make a character come alive: clothing reveals character, quirkiness, attitude, character’s actions/choices, etc.
ANTAGONIST
Same as with the protagonist. Wants? Needs? Goal? Three-dimensional. Character flaw. Motivations? He may be doing something bad, but in his mind it’s something good.
Strong introduction that demonstrates who this character IS, his essence.
The antagonist does not need to be a person. It could be an animal. An alien. A monster. It could be a non-human force: hurricane, volcano, earthquake, disease, something supernatural/paranormal, etc.
In some instances, the protagonist could be his own antagonist, such as, “Grace Is Gone.”
WORLD
The big picture. What does it look like? The structure that your characters live under: laws, government, technology, magical, etc. Rules of this world. Is it in the world of the military, court, hospital, wall street, illegal drugs, etc.?
SETTING
Time, location, mood, atmosphere, ambience (sounds, colors, climate, etc.), objects (furniture, cars, etc.), people (types of extras).
For example: Dracula’s Castle, having an atmosphere of fear, uneasy feeling.
ROCKY: The dingy streets of Philadelphia and its fight clubs.
ROCKY’S OPENING PARAGRAPH:
“... The club itself resembles a large unemptied trash-can. The boxing ring is extra small to insure constant battle. The lights overhead have barely enough wattage to see who is fighting.”
If a setting is unfamiliar to an audience, rich details will help them visualize it.
GENRE
Comedy, action, thriller, etc. If it’s a hybrid, its primary genres.
TONE
It evokes emotion.
Thriller, is it suspenseful? Horror, is it fearful? Comedy, is it humorous? Is it broad comedy: “Pet Detective”? Is it dark comedy: “Heathers”? Is the story a fantasy, or realism? Is it sad? Is it romantic: “When Harry Met Sally”?
In AMERICAN BEAUTY, the protagonist’s first opening dialogue, he tells the audience: “In less than a year, I’ll be dead.”
This certainly conveys tone.
Tone is also inappropriate content: Having nudity and profanity when it’s a family film.
DIALOGUE
The majority will be brief. It will be natural, fresh, stimulating and intriguing.
Used to create the characters, world of the story and to move the plot forward.
Dialogue stands out being centered down the screenplay. A reader will be able to detect right away if it’s professional or amateurish, whether or not the writer has a good ear for dialogue.
DESCRIPTION
Clear, concise and vivid that implies more than it says.
It’s vital a writer compels the reader to “see” the movie. When a reader reads the words, images form in his brain, providing a mental picture, but you don’t want to stop there.
You want the reader to “feel.” A writer is looking to engage the emotions of the reader. You need the emotion to flow to the reader’s heart. The heart is where our ultra intense feelings come from.
Doesn’t matter how many words as long they are -- necessary words -- to express what the writer needs the reader to see, feel and know for his narrative to work.
Use language that’s vibrant, has a rhythm, drawing a reader in where he feels it. Full of energy.
Not in a way where it’s dense, flowery novelistic writing, though a novelistic flair here and there could be engaging.
When possible choose specific details over generalization. A pit bull attacking a character will have more impact than “a dog.” Type of car, clothing, gun, etc., reveals character and makes the visual more interesting.
INCITING INCIDENT (II)
It reveals the story hook, where something happens. This entertains (grabs) the audience, causing anticipation and expectation, holding them captivated until the Major Dramatic Question (MDQ) is answered at the climax.
In JAWS the inciting incident is the female swimmer being killed by a monstrous shark. The MDQ: Will the protagonist (sheriff) succeed in killing the shark?
The concept is a monstrous shark killing machine. If that shark ain’t killing after ten minutes, the audience may get bored and distracted, wondering when the concept/story is gonna commence.
If the protagonist isn’t in the scene when an II happens, then the story must be structured where this incident crosses paths with the protagonist, inciting him to act, or there be no drama and no story.
Hooking an audience with tension, mystery and suspense is a strong technique.
OTHER MAJOR AND MINOR ELEMENTS A READER WANTS
Theme. Pacing. Rhythm. Style. Introduction of important secondary characters. Conflict (external and internal). Relationship dynamics. Set ups (to be paid off). Aesthetic look. Nice balance of white and black. Standard format.
Correct spelling and grammar, which will not only make the writer look professional, but help the reader from being distracted and taken out of the story.
Momentum, one scene moving to the next. No matter if it’s a slow pace drama like “The Piano,” or fast paced action like “Mad Max: Fury Road.”
Show, don’t tell. Showing something happening visually instead of one character telling another character what happened.
FIRST TEN PAGES: WHAT READERS WANT
(Note: the following is a generalization. Depending on a writer’s artistic vision and what works for HIS story, some of the mentioned elements may not necessarily be found, or required in their own first ten pages.)
Why is it the “first ten pages” and not 8, 12 or 15?
Was it totally arbitrary because the number ten was a nice even number? Was it because of the old ten minute reels? Was it because of producer Joel Silver’s Whammo edict (action beat of some sort every ten minutes as not to bore the audience)? Or, was it because of an industry person’s experience he has found 10 pages provides enough evidence of whether or not a script has good prospects?
Whatever the reason, the first ten pages is the industry standard.
In the context of a screenplay, the first ten pages are the most important.
Yes, I know -- EVERY -- page is important, but I like to look at it this way: the first ten pages represents a script’s “curb appeal.” The more attractive it is the more appealing it is to hook a buyer and entice him to enter and look at the property further.
The first ten pages is the story’s foundation. It establishes and sets in motion the major elements: theme, world, plot, characters, genre, tone, Inciting Incident, etc.
The reason you always hear that you have to hook/grab the reader (agents, managers, producers, studio executives, etc.) by ten pages is because of volume and time.
When an industry person takes a pile of scripts home for his weekend read, he’s not gonna spend the 110 minutes it takes to read each screenplay knowing after 10 pages he’s gonna pass.
Is this fair to the writer? No, it isn’t. Is it possible an industry person may miss out on a great script because he stopped reading after 10 pages? Yes, it is.
It’s because of this possibility that there are some industry people that will read at least up to the first act.
A writer’s opening/first page is his first impression to an industry person, so hook the reader right away with a captivating opening visual, memorable dialogue, vivid description, or connect emotionally.
I suggest that the screenplay’s opening harmonizes with the story that’s about to unfold. Not be just a gimmick to hook the reader.
If possible, the opening visual will hint/express to the reader one or more of the following: genre, tone, theme and/or mood.
For example, THE CROW:
FADE IN:
EXT. CEMETERY - LATE AFTERNOON
BOOM! A crack of lightning illuminates the silhouette of a perched crow large in the f.g.
-- Within one to three pages, a reader will know, or get a hint, whether or not a writer can write. The reader will know if he’s in the hands of a professional, or an amateur.
What will tip him off are things like unoriginal voice, word choices, an abundance of unnecessary words, useless scenes, confusion, lack of craftsmanship (using tools, principles and techniques well), meandering narrative, too much backstory/exposition, cliche scenes (sometimes a cliche scene is required), etc.
Readers want to see magic happening on the pages. This is accomplished with specific narrative elements.
The important elements are the following:
VOICE
Original and distinct. Not cliche and derivative. If it’s something familiar, there’s a fresh take or unique spin.
When a new writer asks what does a “writer’s voice” mean, I’ll repeat what I’ve posted in the past:
Ask yourself this: What root sources do writers rely on to create art, i.e., worlds, characters, themes, plot, dialogue, etc.?
The writer relies on his own life experiences: his environment, family and friends’ relationships, attitude, personality, POV, world view, whether or not it was happy, humorous, sad, hurtful, loving, etc.
A writer’s voice is the “essence” of who he is.
Take for example the following comedy writers: Woody Allen, Billy Wilder, Mel Brooks, Nora Ephron, John Hughes, Ethan and Joel Coen. All successful. Why? They told stories in their own, unique voice.
I suggest for a new writer to use the search box for a thread called: “Voice (Descriptive Narrative).”
PROTAGONIST
A memorable character that grabs the reader’s attention the moment he appears on screen. A hero that’s so captivating he/she will attract a star.
Introduce the protagonist with a strong event/situation that illustrates their personality?
For example, “Pirates of the Caribbean's” introduction of Captain Jack Sparrow. “The Verdict’s” introduction of Paul Newman’s character, the alcoholic and demoralized attorney Frank Galvin. This film has some great expression of characterization. The reader sees and gets this character.
Readers look for: a vulnerability in the protagonist. Protagonist’s motivations. Complex, three-dimensional protagonist. What’s the protagonist’s goal? Need? Wants? External conflict?
What is the protagonist’s flaw? What scares him emotionally? His inner conflict?
For example, in the “The King’s Speech” the protagonist, King George VI, has a severe fear of public speaking because of a debilitating stutter.
One of the most important functions of the first ten pages is to create an emotional connection with the protagonist, having the readers become emotionally involved with what the protagonist needs to resolve, or conquer over his journey.
The reader gets hooked because of the emotional commitment. The protagonist is no longer a stranger. It’s a person the reader cares about and is motivated to keep turning the pages, wanting, hoping, the protagonist obtains his goal.
Other techniques to get a reader to care for and identify with your protagonist is the use of sympathy and empathy. (I did a thread on this titled “Creating The Anti-Hero Protagonist.” Type it in the search box and check it out.)
When possible, have the first character to appear to be the protagonist. Readers/viewers have a subconscious expectation that when they see the first character to appear in a film/screenplay, it’s the hero/protagonist of the story.
In my teen romantic comedy’s opening page, I play with this audience expectation to create an impactful surprise.
The protagonist can be introduced into the story in different ways: physical presence, named dropped in talks between other characters, in a photo, home video tape, etc.
For example, in “Cash McCall,” staring James Garner, his character didn’t appear on screen for the first 18 minutes of the film. Before then, his name was only mention in dialogue between characters and by a portrait painting done by the love interest.
When introducing the protagonist, besides his name and age, you want to paint a vivid picture as possible to express who this character IS to the audience. His essence. Use actions and/or descriptions that make a character come alive: clothing reveals character, quirkiness, attitude, character’s actions/choices, etc.
ANTAGONIST
Same as with the protagonist. Wants? Needs? Goal? Three-dimensional. Character flaw. Motivations? He may be doing something bad, but in his mind it’s something good.
Strong introduction that demonstrates who this character IS, his essence.
The antagonist does not need to be a person. It could be an animal. An alien. A monster. It could be a non-human force: hurricane, volcano, earthquake, disease, something supernatural/paranormal, etc.
In some instances, the protagonist could be his own antagonist, such as, “Grace Is Gone.”
WORLD
The big picture. What does it look like? The structure that your characters live under: laws, government, technology, magical, etc. Rules of this world. Is it in the world of the military, court, hospital, wall street, illegal drugs, etc.?
SETTING
Time, location, mood, atmosphere, ambience (sounds, colors, climate, etc.), objects (furniture, cars, etc.), people (types of extras).
For example: Dracula’s Castle, having an atmosphere of fear, uneasy feeling.
ROCKY: The dingy streets of Philadelphia and its fight clubs.
ROCKY’S OPENING PARAGRAPH:
“... The club itself resembles a large unemptied trash-can. The boxing ring is extra small to insure constant battle. The lights overhead have barely enough wattage to see who is fighting.”
If a setting is unfamiliar to an audience, rich details will help them visualize it.
GENRE
Comedy, action, thriller, etc. If it’s a hybrid, its primary genres.
TONE
It evokes emotion.
Thriller, is it suspenseful? Horror, is it fearful? Comedy, is it humorous? Is it broad comedy: “Pet Detective”? Is it dark comedy: “Heathers”? Is the story a fantasy, or realism? Is it sad? Is it romantic: “When Harry Met Sally”?
In AMERICAN BEAUTY, the protagonist’s first opening dialogue, he tells the audience: “In less than a year, I’ll be dead.”
This certainly conveys tone.
Tone is also inappropriate content: Having nudity and profanity when it’s a family film.
DIALOGUE
The majority will be brief. It will be natural, fresh, stimulating and intriguing.
Used to create the characters, world of the story and to move the plot forward.
Dialogue stands out being centered down the screenplay. A reader will be able to detect right away if it’s professional or amateurish, whether or not the writer has a good ear for dialogue.
DESCRIPTION
Clear, concise and vivid that implies more than it says.
It’s vital a writer compels the reader to “see” the movie. When a reader reads the words, images form in his brain, providing a mental picture, but you don’t want to stop there.
You want the reader to “feel.” A writer is looking to engage the emotions of the reader. You need the emotion to flow to the reader’s heart. The heart is where our ultra intense feelings come from.
Doesn’t matter how many words as long they are -- necessary words -- to express what the writer needs the reader to see, feel and know for his narrative to work.
Use language that’s vibrant, has a rhythm, drawing a reader in where he feels it. Full of energy.
Not in a way where it’s dense, flowery novelistic writing, though a novelistic flair here and there could be engaging.
When possible choose specific details over generalization. A pit bull attacking a character will have more impact than “a dog.” Type of car, clothing, gun, etc., reveals character and makes the visual more interesting.
INCITING INCIDENT (II)
It reveals the story hook, where something happens. This entertains (grabs) the audience, causing anticipation and expectation, holding them captivated until the Major Dramatic Question (MDQ) is answered at the climax.
In JAWS the inciting incident is the female swimmer being killed by a monstrous shark. The MDQ: Will the protagonist (sheriff) succeed in killing the shark?
The concept is a monstrous shark killing machine. If that shark ain’t killing after ten minutes, the audience may get bored and distracted, wondering when the concept/story is gonna commence.
If the protagonist isn’t in the scene when an II happens, then the story must be structured where this incident crosses paths with the protagonist, inciting him to act, or there be no drama and no story.
Hooking an audience with tension, mystery and suspense is a strong technique.
OTHER MAJOR AND MINOR ELEMENTS A READER WANTS
Theme. Pacing. Rhythm. Style. Introduction of important secondary characters. Conflict (external and internal). Relationship dynamics. Set ups (to be paid off). Aesthetic look. Nice balance of white and black. Standard format.
Correct spelling and grammar, which will not only make the writer look professional, but help the reader from being distracted and taken out of the story.
Momentum, one scene moving to the next. No matter if it’s a slow pace drama like “The Piano,” or fast paced action like “Mad Max: Fury Road.”
Show, don’t tell. Showing something happening visually instead of one character telling another character what happened.
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