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Old 05-28-2016, 10:57 PM   #51
FoxHound
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

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Originally Posted by Phoenixman78 View Post
If they're looking for something that could get produced then wouldn't "premise" be the main thing they're looking for?
No. It's not. I got three consecutive 8's for premise on the same script (from three very subjective readers). I went out on three e-mail blasts and... NOT ONE SINGLE VIEW. Zilch. Nada.

You'd think such a rare event would garner at least a reader to check out the first three pages. If anything, this proves industry folks are looking for fresh voices, not producible content.
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Old 05-29-2016, 02:02 AM   #52
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

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No. It's not. I got three consecutive 8's for premise on the same script (from three very subjective readers). I went out on three e-mail blasts and... NOT ONE SINGLE VIEW. Zilch. Nada.

You'd think such a rare event would garner at least a reader to check out the first three pages. If anything, this proves industry folks are looking for fresh voices, not producible content.
OR it means that with some agents that the Black List ratings mean two thirds of sweet nothing to them. Who knows? All you can do is keep trying dude. Keep beating at that door until they answer it.
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Old 05-29-2016, 08:17 AM   #53
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

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Originally Posted by Phoenixman78 View Post
Can you imagine how many poorly written screenplays by deluded amateurs (possibly such as myself, I don't know....) are clogging up the Black List? There would be a huge amount. If they're looking for something that could get produced then wouldn't "premise" be the main thing they're looking for?
Well, they're not clogging up the Black List, because the Black List provides a service to writers and a service to industry professionals that evaluate your spec on whether that reader would pass it up the line and/or how likely they might be willing to do that.

The professionals probably read the logline, read the evaluation and then determine whether it's worth a download and a read. Downloads are only great if someone calls you afterward. You'll never know what was the reason they didn't call-- that sucks.

And no, premise doesn't sell a movie if the other elements are firing on all pistons, too. It's gotta have all of it. Industry professionals are not looking at whether a story is professionally written or not, I'm sorry, they're not. If they were, that would be a category that is scored. They're looking for compelling stories that are well written and require little "development" to get them set up.

They're looking for material that can sell, and be made into a movie. I'm not trying to be harsh here, but that is the reality. And a produceable movie isn't about premise alone. Agents and managers want to know that you can write a compelling story that translates to film and can sell.
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I think when you assume bud, it's that old saying, you make an ass out of u and me. I guarantee the BL readers and all paid readers for any company would have to suffer through piles of absolute garbage before they find a script they enjoy reading or doesn't make them want to gouge their eyes out. The issue isn't if an overall 7 isn't professionally written or not the issue is when 2 consecutive readers have greatly opposing views on one script and that it seems to be a common occurrence on the BL.
I didn't say I was making the assumption, I said I thought others might be. The first spec I put up there was with a writing partner was like that. It was professionally written and we received not a single mention for it. We believed it should have done better, the reader disagreed. It is what it is.

Also, I'm not disputing that the disparage between scores doesn't exist, it does and it's concerning when one spec receives a 8 and a 4 from two different professional readers. Something is definitely off there. The argument that one person's 8 is another person's 6, is true I think when it comes to people who are making the decision to put millions into a movie to get it made.

Personally, I wouldn't expect that to be the case with a reader, because the reader's job is to find marketable material that the manager, producer, agent can make. I may still be naive on this one.

What I think is more concerning, is the possibility that you get a 5 out the gate, but you didn't pay for the second review, so you'll never know if the next two reviews wouldn't have been an 8 or above. There are writers who have received 10s and 5s on the same spec-- that's just insane.

And I've faced the same problems as others on the board. I had one instance where a main character is referred to as name A for the entire spec, and the reader kept calling him name B, which was his first name referred to only two or three times in the entire spec. Every line of dialogue clearly said name A. There were other errors, too. But clearly, the reader may not have read the script thoroughly. The review was expunged and gave me a new one at no charge.

I've had a few reviews that had to be replaced, just like others have.
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The BL worked for you and that's fantastic but the inconsistency of the BL readers, coupled with a 50% price rise is what makes me as well as plenty of others question it's use when trying to break into the industry. I'm in the top quarterly list for my pilot but I ain't got one extra view since I hit it 2 weeks ago, not even from a peer. For now I'm going to rely on comps and good ol' queries to see if I can get somewhere with my writing.
I'm not arguing that the inconsistencies aren't concerning. This is the way it works. And you have to decide if you're willing to roll the dice or not. That's what my post was in respect to-- asking if anyone thought it was worth another roll of the dice. I don't know, but I want to believe it would be.

It's one tool that can be used to gain access. It's not the only tool, and every writer who wants to break in should understand that.
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Old 05-29-2016, 11:10 PM   #54
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

Finally got my reader download after emailing support. Now on the "evaluation in progress" stage.

I wouldn't imagine it'll take much longer, considering the lengths of the evals posted.

Doesn't it have to go through BL manager approval though before it gets posted?
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Old 05-30-2016, 05:04 PM   #55
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

So I did as I said I would and did a query blast of about 20 emails and even used some positive comments from my evaluations. I got 1 "send it to me" and 1 "no unsolicited submissions". The rest is silence so far but you never know. I never mentioned the scores because I think they'd go by what they think they can sell and the scores wouldn't sway them too much either way.
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Old 05-30-2016, 08:54 PM   #56
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

It can help to put the scores in as well as include a link to the Black List evaluation.

Don' be discouraged, it's a holiday weekend. Give it a week or so for people to read and see if they like it. Queries will be on the bottom of their list and it's now a short week.

Good luck.
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Old 05-30-2016, 09:35 PM   #57
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

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Originally Posted by finalact4 View Post
It can help to put the scores in as well as include a link to the Black List evaluation.

Don' be discouraged, it's a holiday weekend. Give it a week or so for people to read and see if they like it. Queries will be on the bottom of their list and it's now a short week.

Good luck.
Cheers bud. I left the scores out because I didn't think they'd sway anyone either way if they weren't keen on the script and I think concept and marketability is probably what they're after but we shall see.

My response came from a UK company and I knew there was a long weekend in the US at the moment. I'm patient enough to wait. I know it'll probably a good 4 to 6 weeks before I get a response, if any, from the company I sent it to 2 days ago. I might just give them a short, friendly follow up email in a month.
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Old 06-01-2016, 11:17 AM   #58
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

Got my third eval today. It was a 7 (first was 8 and second was 5). You can go back a couple pages in this thread if you want to see 3 different readers evaluations for the same script.

Era:
Present

Locations:
New Orleans

Genre:
Comedy, Dark Comedy, Dramatic Comedy

Logline:
A young cook takes an apprenticeship with a self-taught chef, but quickly starts to realize that the chef's eccentricities are much darker than he could have ever imagined.

Strengths:
The premise is great - it's hard to make a potential cannibal seem empathetic, but against all odds, the writer has accomplished this. Both Dev and Levi are strong characters; they both have incredible drive and a passion for what they do, even if Levi's drive veers strongly toward madness. The flashback scenes to Levi's upbringing in a funeral home are dark and funny, as the talking corpses are at once ridiculous and seem right at home. The New Orleans setting coupled with the cast's diversity are refreshing and will appeal to both executives and audiences alike. The world-building is particularly well done - there are many characters, relationships and rivalries introduced without ever feeling overwhelming or, more importantly, like any of the relationships or characters have been tacked on just to fill in some length. The writing is very good and the writer's voice and unique point of view shine through on every page.

Weaknesses:
At 46 pages, the script is a little short for an hour long series - another 10 pages could be added and still be within the typical length parameters. The ending feels a bit abrupt, so those pages could be used to add another scene somewhere - the final scene is shocking, but it may be interesting to see Dev's decision-making process, ending when he (presumably) shows up the next day to continue his apprenticeship with Levi. Of the two, Dev feels slightly less developed than Levi, as the audience doesn't see as much of his background and his character is fairly passive. He mostly just shows up when and where he's told to show up and goes with the flow, so it might be nice to spend a scene with him that gives him more agency. On a very small note, salmonella is very contagious, sometimes for weeks - perhaps Levi doesn't actually give Dev salmonella-tainted water, but if he does, it seems like a terrible business decision to have him come to work anytime soon.

TV series potential:
There is real potential here, like a funnier, marginally "lighter" version of DEXTER. Though the hook of the story may be difficult for some in the audience to swallow (no pun intended), there's still something very compelling about the strong characters, the interesting setting and the dark humor. If nothing else, it's a very strong writing sample and should definitely garner reads from industry professionals.

Pages:
46
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Old 06-09-2016, 02:51 PM   #59
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

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Still awaiting my second review. It was ordered 51 days ago, so evidently demand is FAR outweighing supply still, at least in my genre. Here's my first review though. Composite scores were 7,7, 8, 8, and 9. Overall 8.

Menu
Era:
Present Day / 2000s

Locations:
New Orleans, LA

Genre:
Comedy Thriller, Dark Comedy, Drama, Crime Drama, Crime Thriller

Logline:
A self-taught chef struggling to stay atop the culinary world hires an apprentice to help develop new recipes, but the young trainee soon discovers the chef's secret ingredient... human.

Strengths:
CARNE is shockingly delightful; a series that will have you coming back for seconds and thirds. The dark tone and unexpected plot twists are expertly crafted, complementing the well-developed characters and strong dialogue. This pilot incorporates the culinary world and the setting of New Orleans in a way that also pairs nicely with the plot. LEVI is such a peculiar character, but it's hard not to root for him. If Frank Underwood was a chef, his name would be LEVI CHEVAL. The subplot of him having conversations with dead bodies is an interesting example of how this script turns the perverse into the provocative. DEV is the perfect foil for LEVI because of his open naivety, which contrasts well with LEVI's personality. The pilot thoroughly sets up the dynamic between LEVI, TERRY, and KAREN to be a future source of conflict that narrative can be driven from. The use of diagrams and animations to explain the anatomy of various animals is visually engaging and adds to the humor. Regardless of the viability of this concept in the marketplace, industry readers should recommend this writer because of the realness brought to the table with disturbingly entertaining ideas executed to perfection.

Weaknesses:
The unconventional premise may be unpalatable to most networks, so any ways to brighten the possibilities of the script with innocence, romance, and playfulness would help its marketability. In terms of plot, LEVI's motivations for hiring DEV feel understated. Is he doing it because he doesn't trust anyone else who works for him? What about his waning success has made him hire an inexperienced apprentice? All of the characters are connected with clear purpose, which mostly holds up (feels slightly convenient) until the reveal that LEVI is sleeping with LACEY. Then it starts to get a little soap opera. Going forward, expanding outside of LEVI's inner circle to see other characters' story lines will go a long way in maintaining audience appetite. The script was devoid of flaws, except for a misspelling of LACEY as "Lacy" on p.27.

TV series potential:
CARNE offers a very original story set in an attractive world, but the dark elements make it a tough sell to most broadcast networks. Basic or premium cable might be the preferred outlet to best preserve the dark tone and possibilities. If you baked DEXTER and HANNIBAL into BURNT, you'd be served with a delicious concoction called, CARNE.

Pages:
46

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Old 06-09-2016, 02:57 PM   #60
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Default Re: My first Blacklist review - 8

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Thank you!
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