Black List vs Spec Scout

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  • #31
    Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

    Originally posted by Gary Dragan Milin View Post
    Here's the high concept part:

    The professor is trying to invent a new form of technology in the hopes of solving all of mankind's problems (mainly war). But this new technology ends up leading to the creation of a new form of hyper advaced AI that takes over the human race and solves all of mankind's problems using mind control implants.

    On their last time jump that's supposed to take them home, something goes wrong and they overshoot the present and wind up over 600 years in the future. At first the professor is thrilled to see that his technology has led to the formation of a utopian human society free of war, suffering, and poverty.

    But then they realize that everyone in the future above the age of 25 is a mind controlled drone and that an evil AI is ruling the world. And it considers the professor to be it's "father".

    The entire second half is a twist on the Eloi - Morlock society from HG Wells' novel. With an AI ruled underground city representing the Morlocks. And a seemingly utopian 1950s society on the surface where everyone under the age of 25 lives in carefree happiness.

    But I decided against getting into all that in the query letter. The revelation of the true nature of the futurustic society is one of the big twists in the story.

    What happens at the bottom of the last page is the biggest twist of all.

    But I'm not gonna spoil that here.

    Sorry.
    And I thought the construction of my last logline was difficult (somewhere on this site is a hilarious thread that chronicles the varied opinions concerning what is essential to a logline, story, life, the universe and everything).

    Originally posted by Richmond Weems View Post
    Great. We're all competing against Dwight Schrute.
    That means his feelings regenerate at twice the speed of a normal man.

    Comment


    • #32
      Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

      Hi Gary,

      I'm just saying the logline alone sounds like it's been done before, but I'd read it anyways since I love time travel movies -- especially with dinosaurs.

      If you get a good score, I think the writer should put as much as they want in the logline section to make it as unique as possible.

      It's just nice to hear execution alone can get you many reads (again, others might think this sounds high concept). I've wasted lots of time writing scripts in a genre I like, but didnt like the concept -- and the only reason I chose said concepts was because they sounded high, and high is what gets you reads.

      It's like sometimes you just want to write "family stuck in a haunted house," but it sounds so generic -- this is where the execution must really shine

      Comment


      • #33
        Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

        Originally posted by BillG View Post
        Hi Gary,

        I'm just saying the logline alone sounds like it's been done before, but I'd read it anyways since I love time travel movies -- especially with dinosaurs.

        If you get a good score, I think the writer should put as much as they want in the logline section to make it as unique as possible.

        It's just nice to hear execution alone can get you many reads (again, others might think this sounds high concept). I've wasted lots of time writing scripts in a genre I like, but didnt like the concept -- and the only reason I chose said concepts was because they sounded high, and high is what gets you reads.

        It's like sometimes you just want to write "family stuck in a haunted house," but it sounds so generic -- this is where the execution must really shine
        Here's my writing philosophy in a nutshell:

        Have a high concept that everyone can relate to, but that isn't very original.

        And then give it a twist that makes it feel unique and fresh.

        Just don't twist it so hard that it feels weird.

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        • #34
          Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

          Originally posted by Richmond Weems View Post
          I have to echo, though, what robertcc said about Gary's work ethic. More than a few people (including me) could do well to emulate him.
          And I'm starting to think I should emulate people who have a life outside of their writing.

          I'm sure there's a happy middle ground there somewhere.

          Maybe I'll look for it after I finish my next script...

          Comment


          • #35
            Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

            Originally posted by Paladin View Post
            First of all, congratulations on your numbers and the fact you were contacted by a manager. That's fabulous and quite rare.

            Just to add my experience to the conversation. I received an 8 on my first review, and got around 9 or 10 downloads. Purchased another review several weeks later, and that one received a 6, which brought the aggregate down to a 7. So far, 66 impressions and 13 downloads. The genre for the script is "drama" with sub-genres of "family drama" and "crime drama." It's made the Top Lists for "family drama" and "crime drama."

            Regarding loglines, I started out with a one sentence logline, then after reviewing some of the past BL archives, I noticed that a lot of them were almost brief synopses. So I decided to lengthen my logline. There doesn't seem to be a hard and fast rule regarding logline length on this site. Whatever perks the readers' interest is the key here.

            If you saw the Month Five stats that BL emailed to us, you'll see that they are very eye-opening. Not that many scripts get more than five downloads. I was very surprised. To reach 20+ downloads is really rare. If I'm reading the stats correctly, only 47 scripts have achieved 20 or more downloads (out of 3,651 scripts submitted). As another example, only 213 scripts have received 5-10 downloads.
            I'm a stats-a-holic, I really need to check out that report.

            And I must say, I'm starting to feel really good with my download numbers after all this. I thought they were good, but certainly not exceptional.

            I was actually more pleased that my impressions count was only twice as high as my downloads. That lead me to believe my logline was very effective.

            Of course after starting this thread my impressions shot through the roof, so that's no longer a good indicator of anything. Thanks guys!

            Comment


            • #36
              Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

              Originally posted by captainhaystack View Post
              And I thought the construction of my last logline was difficult (somewhere on this site is a hilarious thread that chronicles the varied opinions concerning what is essential to a logline, story, life, the universe and everything).
              I've never written an easy logline. It usually takes me a few weeks of blood, sweat and tears to finally come up with one I feel confident about.

              Then after I have a good night's sleep I usually realize it sucks and have to start over.

              But a good logline opens more doors then anything else I've tried.

              Including a crowbar.

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              • #37
                Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                Originally posted by captainhaystack View Post
                The Franklin Leonard action figure comes with a switchblade laptop and internet boomstick.

                lol
                Twitter @CameronAlxander

                Comment


                • #38
                  Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                  Originally posted by captainhaystack View Post
                  And I thought the construction of my last logline was difficult (somewhere on this site is a hilarious thread that chronicles the varied opinions concerning what is essential to a logline, story, life, the universe and everything).
                  The logline is instructive, because notice it doesn't reveal the specific complications and the unexpected twist, just the main thrust of the narrative, which I was advocating for your logline.

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                    Originally posted by Gary Dragan Milin View Post
                    I've never written an easy logline. It usually takes me a few weeks of blood, sweat and tears to finally come up with one I feel confident about.

                    Then after I have a good night's sleep I usually realize it sucks and have to start over.
                    Only once did a logline come to me fully formed. Most necessitate a lot of hair pulling before getting them into shape.

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                      Originally posted by robertcc View Post
                      Only once did a logline come to me fully formed. Most necessitate a lot of hair pulling before getting them into shape.
                      So long as it's your own hair, I guess that's okay.

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                        Gary, I think we're thinking different things about what high-concept is. Some simply say(erroneously, IMHO) it's something that can be summarized in one sentence. Others say it's something that's unique and can be summarized in one sentence.

                        As long as you realize it's a concept that's not quite original -- which you do -- then my hat's off to you. The problem with your "twists" is that you didn't put them in the logline -- but I don't even think you have to. I know how hard it is to write loglines, and you seem to be doing just fine with whichever one(s) you've been using in getting reads outside of the Blacklist

                        Is this actually loosely based on Wells' The Time Machine, or just a love letter to it?

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                          Initially I tried to include the twist in my longer logline, but it just came across as too dark and ominous in tone and that didn't really represent the script I wrote. So I decided to just leave that part out.

                          And no, my script isn't an adaptation of Wells' novel. The plot is different. The characters are different. The technology is different. And the time periods visited are different. But the themes are similar.

                          And my third act is definitely a love letter to Wells. With the underground evil AI controlling the inhabitants on the seemingly utopian surface. But my story is still fundamentally different.

                          The focus of my story is on how the professor himself created the nightmare future, because he thought technology should solve all of mankind's problems. However, over the course of his adventures through time, he comes to understand that mankind's flaws are also the source of all our strengths. It's all connected. And if you get rid of all the bad, you also get rid of all the good as well. And what's left is a race of humans that behave more like machines. And a society that has lost all sense ad purpose, other than to worship their godlike supreme leader.

                          But despite how serious this all sounds, it's still mainly a fun and action packed family adventure. So I really wanted the logline to reflect that.

                          Comment


                          • #43
                            Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                            Originally posted by Gary Dragan Milin View Post
                            The focus of my story is on how the professor himself created the nightmare future, because he thought technology should solve all of mankind's problems. However, over the course of his adventures through time, he comes to understand that mankind's flaws are also the source of all our strengths. It's all connected. And if you get rid of all the bad, you also get rid of all the good as well. And what's left is a race of humans that behave more like machines. And a society that has lost all sense ad purpose, other than to worship their godlike supreme leader.
                            I'm so there opening weekend. I don't give a **** if it's in 3D or not.

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                            • #44
                              Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                              Originally posted by captainhaystack View Post
                              I'm so there opening weekend. I don't give a **** if it's in 3D or not.

                              Awesome!!!

                              And don't worry, there'll be a 2D option as well... if you don't mind watching the 11:00am showing.

                              Comment


                              • #45
                                Re: Black List vs Spec Scout

                                Spec Scout UPDATE:

                                I just learned that Spec Scout will be relaunching in a couple weeks. There's going to be a redesign of the site and a bunch of new Industry members will be joining. It looks like they're making a serious effort to compete for the Industry's attention now that the Black List is hogging the spot light.

                                On the downside, my coverage report won't go live on the site until the relaunch. I assume that's the situation for everyone who makes the cut.

                                So I'm pretty glad that I'll be getting some extra exposure, but I'm a little bummed I'll have to wait two weeks.

                                I mentioned to a few people that I made the Top Unrepped list on Spec Scout, so if they go to check, they won't see it there.

                                Anyways, thought you guys would like to know.

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