11 characters introduced for the first time at a meeting...should each be CAP named?

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  • 11 characters introduced for the first time at a meeting...should each be CAP named?

    All residents at a facility are in the same room for a meeting at which each speaks during a Cold Open...do they need to be individually introduced in CAPS or can a script just read "All residents meet in a cafeteria..."

    CAP introduction conventions are followed elsewhere in the script...but do eleven character names need to be spelled out and capitalized when they are first introduced in a pilot's Cold Open? (Isn't this obvious?)

    Thanks...
    @oceanbluesky

  • #2
    Always tough to do 'crowd control' in a situation like that. A cold open isn't a lot of space and you want to focus clearly on some leading character's POV.

    I think it's easier on the reader in that instance to intro as few as possible.

    Hard to get around not introducing and capping the name of any recurring character who speaks in the scene.

    Something like--

    TOM, (surly, 40), DICK (whiny, 30) and HARRY (quick witted, 32) and a bunch of their fellow men's group attendees sit in a circle. Our hero, the put-upon group mediator is GUS (28, ivy league.) Gus scribbles notes.

    -- seems like a decent approach.


    Do the whole bunch say things that delve into character traits? Can you zero in on a smaller conversation just to kick it off? Seems like properly introducing all eleven is going to make the reader dizzy.
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    • #3
      11 characters introduced for the first time at a meeting...should each be CAP named?

      Originally posted by oceanbluesky View Post
      All residents at a facility are in the same room for a meeting at which each speaks during a Cold Open...do they need to be individually introduced in CAPS or can a script just read "All residents meet in a cafeteria..."

      CAP introduction conventions are followed elsewhere in the script...but do eleven character names need to be spelled out and capitalized when they are first introduced in a pilot's Cold Open? (Isn't this obvious?)

      Thanks...
      don't introduce 11 characters at once, especially in a cold open

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      • #4
        Re: 11 characters introduced for the first time at a meeting...should each be CAP nam

        thanks! great suggestions, will zero in on a more compact discussion

        (it takes place in a facility similar to the Situation Room in The West Wing with characters riffing off each other, quickly making pointed statements...they are the only "residents" at their location...had hoped to avoid a huge block of names)
        @oceanbluesky

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        • #5
          Re: 11 characters introduced for first time at a meeting...should each be CAP named?

          Originally posted by JoeBanks View Post
          don't introduce 11 characters at once, especially in a cold open

          Alot of note-taking for that reader right off the bat. I can see the reaction with all those names in caps.. Arrrgh!

          I like that idea of intro-ing a few of them withing the whole group setting context. Still convey the gist of things.
          " Don't really like writing. But I do like having written." Vince Gilligan, Breaking Bad.

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          • #6
            Re: 11 characters introduced for the first time

            What Joe said.

            I would deliberately make it a scene of borderline chaos, as a not-so-subtle cue to the reader that you understand the confusion. No proper names, except for the protag. Use descriptive indicators (MAN WITH A BOW TIE, OVERWEIGHT BUREAUCRAT, et al). Or, if that's too complex, simply SPEAKER (TALKER?) ONE, SPEAKER TWO etc.

            Any more than that, and I think your reader's going to get lost.

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            • #7
              Re: 11 characters introduced for the first time at a meeting...should each be CAP'd?

              Originally posted by oceanbluesky View Post
              All residents at a facility are in the same room for a meeting at which each speaks during a Cold Open...do they need to be individually introduced in CAPS or can a script just read "All residents meet in a cafeteria..."

              CAP introduction conventions are followed elsewhere in the script...but do eleven character names need to be spelled out and capitalized when they are first introduced in a pilot's Cold Open? (Isn't this obvious?)

              Thanks...
              I'd hate to try to introduce a bunch of characters with everyone already seated around a table, if only because the vast majority of them, in that situation, are inevitably going to just be sitting and listening while one or two do the majority of the talking -- and if you just list them, nine of those intro's are just going to be lost on the reader, even if one or two of them speak up at the table and say a word or two.

              Certainly, all eleven of them aren't going to say enough to make us remember them as distinct individuals.

              If it's at all possible, I'd at least try to have them coming into the meeting in twos or threes, so that, first, you can set up whatever this thing is about before the meeting gets underway.

              Also, as you're getting the story underway, you can start laying down who the main players are.

              This is, after all, are first meeting with all of these characters and to have most of them simply sitting around anonymously means that that first meeting will be essentially forgettable.

              If you can find a way -- if only by giving each of them a line or two to say that defines them, their position, who they're going to be, what they're going to play, as they enter the field of action -- are they going to be hard or soft, cynical or idealistic, a giver or a taker, a leader or a follower -- who's going to be on whose side -- it's going to go a long way toward helping the reader figure out who's who as the story unfolds.

              NMS

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              • #8
                Re: 11 characters introduced for first time at a meeting...should each be CAP named?

                I keep thinking of "One Flew Over the Cucko's Nest" ... Introduced when they were stuck in that room, though not in the initial scene if I recall. Wonder if that might help.
                " Don't really like writing. But I do like having written." Vince Gilligan, Breaking Bad.

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                • #9
                  Re: 11 characters introduced for the first time at a meeting...

                  reservoir dogs starts around a table...

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                  • #10
                    Re: 11 characters introduced for first time at a meeting...should each be CAP named?

                    ... heh, at the breakfast diner. I that that a hysterical open, especiallly when they had the revolving converstation about one of 'em who wouldn't kick in for a measly $2.00 tip...
                    " Don't really like writing. But I do like having written." Vince Gilligan, Breaking Bad.

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                    • #11
                      Introductory Notes

                      I'm now thinking of an opening scene with some twenty characters on horseback galloping along the road towards the Canadian border! Yeah, I'd cap their names, but only to impress the readers with the fact that I've identified who all of these characters were, whereas nearly every historical account fails to give a number as to how many Confederate soldiers took part in the raid at St. Albans, Vermont.

                      Reginald Rose's TWELVE ANGRY MEN began as a television play, with a cast list that simply identified the FOREMAN and a brief description of each of the jurors, (age, occupation, physical description, and habits), who were identified solely by a number, (ie. Juror No. 2, Juror No. 3, etc.). The screenplay for the film version also begins with two pages of these introductory notes, (with no character names: 2nd Juror, 3rd Juror, etc.).
                      JEKYLL & CANADA (free .mp4 download @ Vimeo.com)

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                      • #12
                        Re: 11 characters introduced for the first time at a meeting...

                        Originally posted by The lady green View Post
                        reservoir dogs starts around a table...
                        Yeah, but in the original script that scene runs 10 pages, with eight characters introduced, some of whom are backgrounded.

                        With a cold open you have about 2 to 3 pages so there isn't the same luxury to introduce an ensemble cast. ExtHollywoodDay's approach is the way to go.

                        If it's absolutely essential to have all 11 characters then use Max's approach, and later in the script when you have some breathing room you can say the Man With the Bow Tie is MARK EBBENS and call him Mark henceforth.

                        However -- in any ensemble show there is usually one or two characters who are the focal point, and that's who you should be highlighting, really, in order to hint at the leading roles, which will definitely make your life easier with network executives.

                        Even in Friends, Rachel initially drove the story in the pilot because she was escaping her wedding and trying to reconnect with these people she once knew.

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                        • #13
                          I'm not trying to be a smart as! or anything, but that's wayyy too many characters to be introduced in one scene, and probably too many characters for your entire script.

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                          • #14
                            Re: 11 characters introduced for the first time at a meeting...

                            The OP is talking about a "cold open" for a "TV pilot", (but didn't say if it was a comedy or drama), so the feature film suggestions are a bit of a different animal.

                            In any case, OP, I don't think you should cold open your pilot by introducing 11 characters at once.

                            In a drama, like Grey's Anatomy, they maybe have about that many main characters, but they were not introduced all at once. It opened, I think, with Meredith meeting McDreamy in a bar and having sex with him before she knew who he was, and then showing up for her first day, where she finds out, and where she gradually meets, or the show intros, the rest of the cast members, maybe not even all in the pilot, I can't remember.

                            In a half hour sitcom, that seems like too many main characters all together anyway. I think you should find a better cold opening that highlights 2-4 main characters, and then intro the rest gradually.
                            "The Hollywood film business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side." Hunter S Thompson

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