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Old 07-29-2018, 05:43 PM   #1
Mark Somers
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Default Results - "Summer Camp" writing contest

Results

Code:
1st 2nd 3rd Total Sometimes You Get It Wrong -- tehmorp 0 Sweet Summer Rosie -- dpaterso 1 3 9 The Encounter -- bioprofessor 2 1 7 Martin -- Mark Somers 2 1 1 9 Vamp Camp -- Concar 2 1 5 Camp Noose Lake -- UneducatedFan 1 3 6
1st place vote = 3 points, 2nd = 2 points, 3rd = 1 point.

Congratulations to Mark Somers and what's his face.
We now need to go to the Swimsuit competition to break the tie. Thanks a lot.

A different set of readers and things could be way different.

Thanks to all for participating.

Please post your notes and comments in this thread. And again thanks. And you can post notes even if you didn't enter.

Here is the Entries for this contest. Here is the Discussion of contest.
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Last edited by Mark Somers : 07-29-2018 at 11:50 PM.
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Old 07-30-2018, 12:13 AM   #2
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Default Re: Results - "Summer Camp" writing contest

Thanks to those discerning readers who threw some votes my way!

And well done everyone for writing to theme and deadline (well kinda) which is what these things are all about. There had to be winners and there had to be non-winners, alas. Doesn't matter if you didn't score as many points as you would have liked, it's still good practice and hopefully a learning experience.

My votes went like:

1st - The Encounter
2nd - Martin
3rd - Camp Noose Lake

And my shaky reasoning went like:

Sometimes You get it Wrong

My bad, I couldn't tune into the angst of an 11-year-old kid and appreciate her problems. Said problems were more like a slight inconvenience, caused by an adult's mistake, which no one really seems to care about anyway. Hope she enjoys camp!

Sweet Summer Rosie

Mine. I regret nothing. As always, hard to trim the S.O.B. down to a manageable size. Lost a few jokes along the way. No guarantees they would have made it funnier, though.

The Encounter

What an awful ending, an officer of the law is killed in the execution of his lawful duty, while a criminal escapes and is still at large. Shocking! Gets a vote.

Martin

Mom's banging Bigfoot produced a smile but that was the only funny moment, needs more cowbell. Still gets a vote though.

Vamp Camp

Despite vampires, this entry did not hold me, the characters and their exchanges weren't funny enough and it just cuts off. I'm pretty sure The Hunt itself should have taken up the second half of the script. So close yet so far.

Camp Noose Lake

This entry executed a suspenseful build-up that held my attention, if it had continued instead of just cutting off as it did, it would likely have earned a higher spot. Still gets a vote.
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Old 07-30-2018, 05:06 AM   #3
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Default Re: Results - "Summer Camp" writing contest

Congratulations to all the writers who entered, and to the folks who took the time to read and vote. My votes and brief comments:

1. Camp Noose Camp
2. Sweet Summer Rosie
3. Vamp Camp

Warning: Subjective views ahead. Feel free to keep and/or discard.

Sometimes You Get it Wrong
Lots of preteen female characters - too many perhaps for an 8 page short - hard to keep track of or understand why they were important to the story. Not sure what the story was trying to get across. It just kind of ends where it began without any resolution.

Sweet Summer Rosie
Pretty solid flip on the teenage angst at summer camp trope. A bit too much OTN dialogue between family members discussing what happened to their business- each already knows what happened. Again, not sure of the central dramatic question/theme in this one. Maybe, itís not good to stay angry and resentful.

The Encounter
My entry. Inspired by a true past event and our current socio-political state. Years ago, while doing trail maintenance at a regional park I came across two young guys jogging on the trail. They asked me for directions to the highway - I obliged. When I got back to the park office, the parking lot was filled with state troopers, a helicopter circled overhead. The two interlopers had escaped from a nearby prison.

Martin
The character and action description was solid, but I just couldn't quite get why was Martin wearing a homemade cardboard suit. A metaphor for a disability? I honestly donít know or understand what happened, why it happened.

Vamp Camp
Well, it was vampy with all the puns and wisecracks. The dialogue very OTN. This read like the beginning of a story. Not sure I caught the ending. Some good scene description and action lines.

Camp Noose Lake
Good character dialogue and scene description. The story flowed like we were moving toward an ending, albeit a predictable one. Not sure what the role of all the teen characters was.
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Old 07-30-2018, 08:51 AM   #4
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Default Re: Results - "Summer Camp" writing contest

Was a fun writing exercise. I appreciated the opportunity to enter.

My sentiments echo those above on the top three and they were my choices as well.

I smell a cage fight or the writer's equivalent of a cage fight to settle the winner...maybe writing about a cage fight to determine the winner...

The three winners were solid from top to bottom. The others were sharp and clean as well, I just liked the narrative of the top three.

My "Camp Noose Lake" (I should have just shortened it to "Noose Lake") could be retooled to a "Stand By Me"/"Stranger Things" type feature I guess once the washed up lawman shows up. I did a poor job self editing it and found all kinds of tweaks and fixes after re-reads.

Those who won, much deserved and I enjoyed reading each of the five others and appreciated you posting them.
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Old 08-01-2018, 11:21 PM   #5
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Default Re: Results - "Summer Camp" writing contest

Thanks for your thoughts & comments, fun was had.

And that was the summer camp contest, I guess!
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Old 08-02-2018, 11:41 PM   #6
Mark Somers
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Default Re: Results - "Summer Camp" writing contest

My votes:


1st - Sweet Summer Rosie
2nd - Vamp Camp
3rd - The Encounter

Sweet Summer Rosie is a lot of fun. Mom and angry Dad, especially, are hilarious. Well crafted.

Vamp Camp also fun stuff. Ended a bit abruptly but still fun.

The Encounter is quite a bit darker but very well executed.


Derek's entry has incredible fart joke potential. Alas mine doesn't have that. I'd have to say given the petulance for flatulence that his story possess puts it on a whole nother plane.
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Old 08-03-2018, 01:09 AM   #7
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Default Re: Results - "Summer Camp" writing contest

Thanks for the vote and thanks for the comments! And for doing the admin, did I say that already? No because I'm ignorant.

Now I wish I'd given the story its full potential.
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