Battleship

[Signal30]

Originally Posted by ChadStrohl

I can't get past the alien invasion part of it. Why couldn't we have some sort of Top Gun meets Hunt For Red October mash-up and call it Battleship?

Because if the American battleships were up against an earthly nemesis large enough to float a fleet, the movie'd be sunk in that country's box office.

[Paul Striver]

Originally Posted by Signal30

Because if the American battleships were up against an earthly nemesis large enough to float a fleet, the movie'd be sunk in that country's box office.

Exactly. The days of movies having Russia or China as the enemy are over, given that those countries are now the two largest sources of foreign box office. I guess that should be considered progress...

It probably won't be long until foreign box office accounts for 90+% of big action films' revenues (it's already 70+%) -- then maybe we'll start seeing the USA cast as the enemy.

[ChadStrohl]

Good points. So we'll add a few more movies to the mash-up. The Rock, Star Trek, and Under Seige.

When a disgruntled Admiral and his loyal crew steal the most advanced Battleship ever designed, an old sea dog and an untested crew are the only ones who stand a chance at stopping him from reaching the East Coast and laying waste to America.

[Biohazard]

Originally Posted by Signal30

But look on the bright side...it also gives you a solid reason to finally watch all those movies that you've heard are great, but still haven't got around to checking out.

My watchlist on letterboxd.com is up well over 350 films.

Even if there were no movies made for the rest of the year, I'd still have enough to last me deep into 2013.

[Madbandit]

Originally Posted by ChadStrohl

Good points. So we'll add a few more movies to the mash-up. The Rock, Star Trek, and Under Seige.

When a disgruntled Admiral and his loyal crew steal the most advanced Battleship ever designed, an old sea dog and an untested crew are the only ones who stand a chance at stopping him from reaching the East Coast and laying waste to America.

Hey, why are you writing down this script? Get to work, you lazy son of a bitch!!!

[60WordsPerHour]

I just can't stop picturing some perplexed bunch of kids after their parents have rented them Battleship Potemkin by mistake.

[Fortean]

Originally Posted by ChadStrohl

Good points. So we'll add a few more movies to the mash-up. The Rock, Star Trek, and Under Seige.

When a disgruntled Admiral and his loyal crew steal the most advanced Battleship ever designed, an old sea dog and an untested crew are the only ones who stand a chance at stopping him from reaching the East Coast and laying waste to America.

I'd prefer something more historical.

...Captain Raphael Semmes mounted a gun-carriage and read his commission from President Jefferson Davis, authorizing him to take command of the new cruiser. Upon completion of the reading, musicians that assembled from among the three ships' crews began to play the tune "Dixie" just as the quartermaster finished hauling down Enrica's British colors. A signal cannon boomed and the stops to the halliards at the peaks of the mizzen gaf and mainmast were broken and the ship's new battle ensign and commissioning pennant floated free on the breeze. With that the cruiser became Confederate States Steamer Alabama.

Captain Semmes then made a speech about the Southern cause to the assembled seamen, asking them to sign on for a voyage of unknown length and destiny. Semmes had only his 24 officers and no crew to man his new command. When this did not succeed, Semmes changed his tack. It should be noted here that engraved in the bronze of the great double ship's wheel was Alabama's motto: "Aide-toi et Dieu t'aidera" (God helps those who help themselves). Semmes then offered signing money and double wages, paid in gold, and additional prize money to be paid by the Confederate congress for all destroyed Union ships. When the men began to shout "Hear! Hear!" Semmes knew he had closed the deal: 83 seamen, many of them British, signed on for service in the Confederate Navy. Confederate agent Bulloch and the remaining seamen then returned to their respective ships for their return voyage to England. Semmes still needed another 20 or so men for a full crew complement, but enough had signed on to at least handle the new commerce raider. The rest would be recruited from among captured crews of raided ships or from friendly ports-of-call. Of the original 83 crewmen that signed on that day, many completed the full voyage.

Under Captain Semmes, Alabama spent her first two months in the Eastern Atlantic, ranging southwest of the Azores and then redoubling east, capturing and burning northern merchant ships. After a difficult crossing, she then continued her path of destruction and devastation in the greater New England region. She then sailed south, arriving in the West Indies where she raised more havoc before finally cruising west into the Gulf of Mexico. There, in January 1863, Alabama had her first military engagement. She came upon and quickly sank the Union side-wheeler USS Hatteras just off the Texas coast, near Galveston, capturing that warship's crew. She then continued further south, eventually crossing the equator, where she took the most prizes of her raiding career while cruising off the coast of Brazil. After a second Atlantic crossing, Alabama sailed down the southwestern African coast where she continued her war against northern commerce. After stopping in Saldanha Bay on 29 July 1863 in order to verify that no enemy ships were in Table Bay, she finally made a much-needed refitting and reprovisioning visit to Cape Town, South Africa. She then sailed for the East Indies, where she spent six months destroying seven more ships before finally redoubling the Cape of Good Hope en route to France. Union warships hunted frequently for the elusive and by now famous Confederate raider, but the few times Alabama was spotted, she quickly outwitted her pursuers and vanished beyond the horizon.

All together, she burned 65 Union vessels of various types, most of them merchant ships. During all of Alabama's raiding ventures, captured ships' crews and passengers were never harmed, only detained until they could be placed aboard a neutral ship or placed ashore in a friendly or neutral port.

~ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Css_alabama

[SundownInRetreat]

Originally Posted by Paul Striver

then maybe we'll start seeing the USA cast as the enemy.

That will be interesting to see because any film that depicts the USA as anything but heroic and upstanding is deemed 'liberal propaganda'.

Whereas the rest of the world accepts that shady goings on take place in high office and that people/countries get screwed over for greed rather than morals, it appears that the average American is filled with wide-eyed naivety. I think the last film I saw that portrayed an American as a bad guy was Green Zone. Even then, it was just a couple of rogue agents but the backlash it got on IMDb was insane, including 'Hollywood was full of anti-US sentiment because they could name 5 films in all of history where a US character, or the government, was less than righteous'.

That Mel Gibson alone made 3 anti English films in the space of a few years and that the go-to bad guy is the classical English actor is lost on these guys. Donald Trump admitted choosing Piers Morgan for Celebrity Apprentice because he wanted the 'typical slimy Brit' for viewers to boo.

I'm not sure the US at large could handle their country or countrymen regularly being cast as the villain. These guys actually believe what their politicians tell them and attend Presidential campaign rallies in their tens of thousanda, waving placards like groupies. Hell, they didn't elect GW once but twice!

[Signal30]

Originally Posted by SundownInRetreat

Hell, they didn't elect GW once but twice!

That's not the way I remember it.

[ChadStrohl]

Originally Posted by Madbandit

Hey, why are you writing down this script? Get to work, you lazy son of a bitch!!!

Lol. Yeah, that doesn't sound half bad after I read it again. I think I'll add that to the queue.