What Happens In Vegas...
EXT. LAS VEGAS STRIP - NIGHT
Sin City in all its splendor. The strip is a playground for
sparkling lights and floundering dreams. But our place isn't
here, we're headed downtown, to the --
EXT. GOLDEN NUGGET GAMBLING HALL - NIGHT
A vintage picture come to life: a 1978 Mustang roars down the
street. Followed by a different `70s vehicle. Another one.
A LOVEY-DOVEY COUPLE emerges from around a corner, walking
hand in hand in bell bottom pants. A TATTOOED GUY approaches.
He impedes their path, whips out a SWITCHBLADE, robs them.
The two SCREAM for help, but their cries go unanswered.
We're in a different time... And a much seedier Vegas.
INT. GOLDEN NUGGET GAMBLING HALL - HALLWAY - SAME
A suited figure moves briskly through a dark hallway. His
shoes CLIP CLOP on the tile as he approaches a doorway.
Testosterone-charged SHOUTING emanates from that opening.
Hey, take it easy!/What? With this
thing here? You ****in' kiddin me?!
INT. GOLDEN NUGGET GAMBLING HALL - ROOM - CONTINUOUS
The suited figure, VINCENZO (50s), steps inside, an air of
authority accompanies him. He finds --
THREE ITALIAN MEN, all impeccably dressed, standing at a
table in the center of the room.
What's so important that you's
couldn't tell me over the phone?
Boss. You gotta see this one for
As the wiseguy steps aside, we stay on Vincenzo. He takes in
whatever mystery is before him. His eyebrows raise in awe.
INT. GOLDEN NUGGET GAMBLING HALL - CASINO FLOOR - NIGHT
Desperate suckers with newfound faith in God run amok. Slot
machines shower quarters on blue-haired old ladies. Nearby, a
craps table erupts in CHEER. Everybody's a winner!
SUPERIMPOSE: FORTY-FIVE MINUTES EARLIER
THOMAS MILLS (40s) enjoys the fortuitous streak as well. He
sits before a mound of chips, watching cards with pinpoint,
The DEALER distributes two QUEENS to Thomas; an excellent
hand. The dealer's face card shows a KING. Thomas
contemplates, looks to a woman sitting beside him...
What do you think, Mrs. Mills?
KITTY MILLS (30s), Farrah Fawcett hair, dressed like a disco
queen, yells to the dealer:
You sure about that, pumpkin patch?
She looks to him, jaw working on a piece of gum like it's
training for competitive eating.
Thomas gives her a wink. She smiles, looks to the dealer with
I said, "hit him!"
Please, call me Thomas. And you
heard the lady.
The dealer shrugs, then passes Thomas... an ACE! Looks
confused by that deal. Kitty squeals with joy.
The dealer turns over his second card: a JACK. An improbable
victory for Thomas. As the nonplussed dealer shoves more
chips Thomas's way --
Three Italian men approach: the same guys from the opening.
The brutish one never speaks, he's the enforcer.
Good evening, sir.
Hey, Happy Valentine's Day!
Sorry to trouble you, but we'd like
to ask you to come with us.
Based on your outstanding play,
management would like to comp you a
No way, that's far out!
The lovebirds hug, then smooch.
The Penthouse Suite, baby!
Only the best for my Valentine.
(to the men)
Sounds groovy, gentlemen, but we'll
only accept on one condition.
What's that, sir?
You gotta stop calling me "sir!"
I'm Thomas, this is my wife, Kitty.
What's your condition... Thomas?
That was my condition.
Right this way, please.
As Thomas and Kitty get up--
She can stay.
Thomas and Kitty look to one another, don't like the sound of
that. Thomas looks to the men:
Actually, guys, I'd prefer if she
came with me.
And we'd prefer if she stayed.
Thomas doesn't know what to make of these two. He turns to
Buttersnap, this should only take a
minute or two. Will you stay here
and watch the chips?
But this is our Honeymoon, Thomas!
I know, I know--
You promised! Always and forever,
no matter wherever!
Kitty, I'm not running out on you.
I'm simply taking advantage of an
extremely kind offer.
Well in that case, you should have
no problem putting this on...
She removes a SMALL DEVICE from her purse, looks like a
watch. However, where the clock face should be, a white light
The Italian men regard it with inquiring eyes. Thomas looks
less than thrilled.
Come on, Kitty.
Isn't this a bit much?
ITALIAN MAN (O.S.)
What's that you got there?
(to Italian man)
A trust issue.
Take it, Thomas! Right now!
Thomas acquiesces, places the device around his wrist. It
seems to lock and tighten on its own.
That a watch of some sort?
Yeah, you could say that.
Follow us, sir.
The Italian men head off, Thomas doesn't move. They look back
ITALIAN MAN (CONT'D)
Thomas. Please follow us.
He smiles, gives Kitty a hug.
Be back soon.
And if you're not?
Kitty looks to him, something menacing coalescing in her
Hey, hey, hey... We said "no
Just hang loose, Pop Tart, I'll be
back before you know it.
Kitty mulls it over. Seems satisfied.
Okay. May the force be with you.
Thomas heads to the men, Kitty watches him go. Then, she
pulls what looks to be an iPad mini from her purse.
ON THE SONAR SCREEN: A white dot moves farther away from a
Miss? Excuse me, miss?
Personally, I don't care how your
husband finagled the cards, but
usually it's customary to tip your
dealer after such an impressive
I'll remember that, thank you.
I meant as in now. You should tip
me now if it's not too much
Kitty pushes a stack of chips his way, clearly the amount is
of no importance to her.
Happy Valentine's Day.
Whoa! Thank you, miss! Thank you!
God bless you.
She returns her attention to the screen.
INT. GOLDEN NUGGET GAMBLING HALL - ROOM - NIGHT
We're back in the opening room. All eyes on Vincenzo,
standing in the doorway.
He approaches the table, stupefied by what he sees.
See? You never would've believed
Kinda thing you gotta see for
Vincenzo looks to the subject. We hear sounds of COUGHING and
Who are you?
Should ask, "what are you?"
ON THE TABLE --
Thomas lies on his back, beaten, bloodied, though not covered
in crimson. He bleeds DARK GREEN. The white light on his
wrist continues to blink.
Can you speak?
Thomas tries, but the boys put a number on him. Vincenzo
looks to his men, agitated.
The **** would you keep hittin' him
for if he's bleedin' green?!
That's the thing. The blood, it
Yeah. Frankie was explainin' the
price for counting cards, right? So
then Sonny starts hittin' him. Bam.
Bam. Over and over. I'm tryin' to
find the prick's ID, but he ain't
got nothing on `im--
That's because he's not from your
The men look to the doorway. Kitty holds a CRYSTAL SPHERE in
her outstretched hand.
That's the broad he came here with!
You mind explaining what the ****
is goin' on?
Step away from my husband. Now.
Or what? You gonna throw that ball
I promised I wouldn't be violent.
Smart girl... But unfortunately for
you, we've made no such promises.
The wiseguys pull out .357 MAGNUM REVOLVERS. A show of power.
We're on our Honeymoon and wanted
to spend it here, at your casino.
Earthlings are generally a fun
species to be around. We also
admire your holidays, especially
romantic ones like Valentine's Day.
Told you, just like the cinema.
They're ****in' aliens!
And now we'll be going home.
No. You's ain't goin' nowhere.
There's big money in this.
Kitty calmly puts the sphere on the ground, rolls it to them.
The **** is that?
The sphere stops at their feet. A white-hot glow emits.
THE SPHERE SUCKS THEM IN!
The miniature wiseguys, now trapped inside, scream and fire
shots at the spherical walls. It's cute.
Kitty approaches the table, her jaw once again smacking on
So, if we're not supposed to talk
about what happens here, how are we
gonna explain your contusions?
Thomas forces a smile, gives her a wink.