Another lesson learned on Zoetrope



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  • #46
    Re: Another lesson learned on Zoetrope

    Originally posted by creativexec
    As a final example, below are the parentheticals from DEJA VU â€" a 127-page spec script purportedly earning the highest payday in Hollywood history. (The figure is undisclosed.) The script is co-written by Terry Rossio.

    They are:

    (Snip 153 parentheticals)
    So what you are telling us is that if we use exactly 153 parentheticals we are guaranteed to sell for big money. Or is it the ratio of 1.20472441 parentheticals per page?
    Give it all and ask for no return/And very soon you'll see and you'll begin to learn/That it's alright, yes, it's alright...


    • #47
      Re: Another lesson learned on Zoetrope

      Originally posted by creativexec
      Take the screenwriting books out of your asses and write a script that enables the reader to see and feel the movie.

      Almost all of the parenthetical examples in my previous post could be deemed as the writer â€directing.†And most could be deemed as obvious and superfluous.
      I think this is unfair.

      I took the time to read this writer's script and I feel like the advice I gave him was warranted and advised. I'm not a neophyte writer who can only provide screenwriting advice on the use of tools. In fact, I believe I've developed quite the reputation of fighting against such cut and dried advice from people who haven't read the script.

      This, I'm guessing, is a first script from someone new at screenwriting. He made a common newbie writer mistake in thinking that he had to qualify every emotion tacked onto each piece of dialogue. These other reviewers on Zoetrope gave him legitimate advice in that it was poorly used and distracting. 99% of the time it did not help enhance the reading experience but rather worked against getting a reader involved.

      Along with extensive notes about other issues I had with the script, I gave him advice on when it was appropriate to use this tool and when it was wiser to avoid it.

      I don't think it helps someone to say, "Well Zoetrope writers really aren't qualified to critique screenplays because they don't read like industry readers." I, for one, read a screenplay and compare it to professional scripts - not other amateur scripts.

      Because that's what I aspire to. To be sold.

      I think it's as ill advised to say, "Dismiss these criticisms because professional writers do it" as saying "You can't do this because professional writers do it."

      There's nothing inherently wrong with wrylies.

      Like any other tool they must be used effectively.

      So learn how to use them.

      My guess is those high paying scripts had just a wee bit more knowledge on where and how to use these to direct the reader than just overdirecting the obvious.

      Final point. Your lists of parentheticals are helpful to a point. I'd rather see how they were used rather than that they were used.

      (How did I, the Queen of all Rule Busters, get onto this side of the debate in the first place to where I need to be busted by CE whom I normally champion? The planets are out of alignment.)
      "So I guess big parts of our youth are supposed to suck. Otherwise we'd get too attached and wake up one day trapped on a hamster wheel that used to look like a merri-go-round." - Hal Sparks


      • #48
        Re: Another lesson learned on Zoetrope

        Anybody want any aluminum siding?