about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

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  • #46
    Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

    I have no problem with your hero taking the knife, cleverly using it to obtain a sword, and then slashing his way to victory. That's why he's the hero, because he's the meanest son-of-a-swordsman who ever wore a kimono, right?

    As regards "honor" ...you say his family was killed. Is it possible that the samurai who were sent after him were involved in his family's execution? If he realizes this, perhaps via something that's said or something he sees, this would give him understandable motivation to change his mind. It would be dishonorable for him not to avenge his family.

    If that doesn't apply to the scenario then think up an alternative.

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    • #47
      Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

      I always thought the traditional Japanese suicide was called 'hari-kari'.

      Might be wrong. Might be right. Might be a little bit of both.

      I've been trying to follow this post...that pretty much speaks for itself.

      Fubar: if you think it is original and you know what you are going to do then do it. If not put pen to paper and come up with another idea. And another. And another. And another x 10. Now you should have something original.
      One meets his destiny often in the road he takes to avoid it. - French Proverb

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      • #48
        Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

        The Hari-Kari and the Seppuka mean the same thing - basically ritual suicide. It is an important part of the bushido code - the code held by people of the warrior class - true samurais. Basically if the samurai was to accept the seppuka, they should go through it, or otherwise face dishonor. A true samurai would not back out of the seppuka. It's like saying siamese twins that aren't joined together.

        Fubar, you need to do your research, otherwise you'll come out with generic material that permeates misconceptions. Don't forget that there's a whole historical and cultural aspect to the bushido. Centuries of it. If anything, it'll be cliched to ignore it and make up your own stuff based on the limited knowledge from what you've seen in trash movies about concepts of "loyalty" and "honor", and fall for the same pitfalls that the cliched movies make. Next, you'll have your samurai wearing pumps and doing flying kicks.
        Last edited by M4estro; 09-23-2005, 05:47 AM.

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        • #49
          Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

          The Hari-Kari and the Seppuka mean the same thing - basically ritual suicide. It is an important part of the bushido code - the code held by people of the warrior class - true samurais. Basically if the samurai was to accept the seppuka, they should go through it, or otherwise face dishonor.
          I never said he was a "true" samurai. Also, to the Japanese, hara-kiri (NOT hari-kari) does not mean exactly the same as seppuku. The term hara-kiri is considered more vulgar by native speakers.

          Fubar, you need to do your research, otherwise you'll come out with generic material that permeates misconceptions.
          I have read several of Dr Stephen Turnbull's books on samurai culture. Seeing that you keep misspelling seppuku and hara-kiri and writing "samurais" instead of "samurai" in pl., I must question the validity of your "research". Hopefully, it amounts to more than Hollywood movies and a romanticized view of the samurai.

          Besides, as already stated, this is a futuristic story. For my samurai, whether true or not to the commonly accepted notions of samurai tradition, it is more important to expose the corruption of this organization that hides behind a mask of "honor" and "loyalty". The corruption in my story thrives on "blind loyalty" and "dishonorable honor" (think of today's fundamentalism)...

          The audience will feel sympathetic towards my protagonist because he is re-acting against corruption -- NOT a code of honor.

          Perhaps, if you knew more about my story, you would understand better. However, this thread was not created for you to understand my story. Nor did you have to understand my story in order to answer my initial questions. You are simply questioning the plausibility of a story YOU DON'T KNOW.

          AND EVEN IN ANCIENT JAPAN (as already stated), samurai would not always have the guts to commit seppuku when it came to it. Naturally, there were samurai who left their duties as well without commiting seppuku. If you believe otherwise, you are naïve.
          Last edited by fubar; 09-23-2005, 07:29 AM.

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          • #50
            Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

            Originally posted by M4estro
            The Hari-Kari and the Seppuka mean the same thing - ...

            Fubar, you need to do your research,
            I thought it was Hara-Kiri. That's what I remember when I read Yokio Mishima's book. But that was ages ago. I could be wrong.

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            • #51
              Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

              ops. sorry. I responded without reading fubar's post after.

              anyway, fubar. I think you should't be concerned with the scene being too reminiscing of gladiator.

              I had no problem whatsoever with the pages you posted. And I kind of like your story.

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              • #52
                Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

                Thanks vstm10

                Yea, I have already redesigned the scene... I think it works now.

                Also, the pages that you read... they have gone through several revisions since I posted them here, incorporating a lot of the advice I received. Glad you liked it though...

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                • #53
                  Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

                  Yea, I have already redesigned the scene... I think it works now.
                  Then our work here is done. Move along folks. Nothing else to see....

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                  • #54
                    Re: about-to-be-executed-scene -- cliché?

                    Glad you found your answer too, fubar

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