Act 2

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  • #31
    Re: Act 2

    Originally posted by Biohazard
    In my opinion, it's better to see what other people think about your work, because you could be missing some of the most obvious mistakes and not know it.
    exactly. not only that, people here have had some good suggestions that i added and made the story better.

    the only time i see people on this forum get in attack mode on the script pages section is when someone starts defending their mistakes....until the thread reaches 3 and 4 pages of debate, lol.

    I do need to work on getting thicker skin in general (oh, the woes of life), but I'd rather wait to see if that lesson comes from someone who is in a position to get my script into the right hands.
    and how do you know there aren't people on this forum that are in a position to get your script into th right hands? good luck in whatever you decide, i'm starting to feel like a salesman
    One must be fearless and tenacious when pursuing their dreams. If you don't, regret will be your reward.

    The Fiction Story Room

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    • #32
      Re: Act 2

      I am in that afterglow mode right now, yes, but I'm realistic about my chances. I figure by the time someone responds to one of my queries (if that even happens) it will be ready.

      Someone said something about "yeah, it's nice to have friends and family read it, but...". Well, when was the last time your sister gave you three pages of handwritten notes (and 80% of them were dead-on right) about the plot, character, continuity, dialogue, clarity, scene transitions, and common sense? She is the kind of person who will hate a movie and pick it apart if the suspension of disbelief is too tall of an order. And then we spent 4 hours going through the script page-by-page, tweaking things to fix all of the problems. The thing is it was all just minor stuff that a typical non-pro reader may miss or simply dismiss. The kind of stuff that happens in produced movies all the time. There were just some tiny plot holes that needed to be filled in.

      If it passes my father's scrutiny, then I'll know it's ready (and he's not big on romantic comedies). I have to deliver a hard copy to him this week so he can write in the margins. He will dissect character, plot, and dialogue that is subpar. (My sister wanted me to give him to same copy she got to see if he found the same issues. I want him to read the better version. God, she's competitive.) He boasts that he could have fixed some of Spielberg's movies if he'd bothered to send them over. He's the only person who told me that my first script was unbalanced in tone (my sister didn't read that one), while others hailed it as "brilliant" (their word, not mine). My friend who went to film school wants to help me make it an indie movie. Now, it's just sitting on my shelf until I figure out how to balance it.

      Writers pay script consultants a lot of money to get constructive criticism that I can get for free from half the members of my family (the other half are just good for a simple read). I'm just lucky that the fundamentals of the story, characters, comedy, theme, and emotion are all solid in the screenplay already. It doesn't need an overhaul. That just seems too hard to believe for everyone (which I do understand, having read some awful unproduced scripts). I keep trying to explain that I don't just "get it down on paper and figure out the kinks later", so that the final kinks are only very tiny little bumps that get smoothed away with a fine polish.

      Is it the best it can be? Definitely possible. Is it the best I can do now? Yes, I put everything I had into it. Is it the best I could do ever? Hopefully, not. I'm still young and I have a lot to learn.

      I'll let you know what my dad thinks. Maybe then...just maybe...I'll post some pages. My issue with just posting 5 or 10 pages is that it's just 5 or 10 pages. Would someone here be interested in reading the whole thing and giving some honest, constructive feedback? And only if you like romcoms. I don't need an extra hurdle.

      Oh, btw, I'm a she.

      "We're all immigrants now, man."
      - Zia (Patrick Fugit), "Wristcutters: A Love Story"

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      • #33
        Re: Act 2

        Sorry, Velysai. Gender bad assumption.
        https://actbreakdown.com

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        • #34
          Re: Act 2

          Oh, btw, I'm a she.
          Why don't you post pictures and we'll decide if you are telling the truth.

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          • #35
            Re: Act 2

            yea. let us rate you and your script (jus joking)
            One must be fearless and tenacious when pursuing their dreams. If you don't, regret will be your reward.

            The Fiction Story Room

            Comment


            • #36
              Re: Act 2

              Originally posted by Hamboogul
              Why don't you post pictures and we'll decide if you are telling the truth.
              Originally posted by Juno Styles
              yea. let us rate you and your script (jus joking)
              You all should write comedy.

              Angel

              "We're all immigrants now, man."
              - Zia (Patrick Fugit), "Wristcutters: A Love Story"

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              • #37
                Re: Act 2

                I've posted my first 5 pages for you to rip apart.

                "We're all immigrants now, man."
                - Zia (Patrick Fugit), "Wristcutters: A Love Story"

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                • #38
                  Re: Act 2

                  Good work Velysai,

                  Even if it does get ripped apart, it is more than likely going to be constructive and will help you improve your script.

                  Good Luck.
                  I wanna tell you about the time I almost died....

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                  • #39
                    Re: Act 2

                    Except there's been lots of views and only one post. What the heck?

                    "We're all immigrants now, man."
                    - Zia (Patrick Fugit), "Wristcutters: A Love Story"

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      Re: Act 2

                      i commented....see...it didn't even get ripped apart by anybody
                      One must be fearless and tenacious when pursuing their dreams. If you don't, regret will be your reward.

                      The Fiction Story Room

                      Comment

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