I am rewriting my script from the begining, all the way back and changing it to be more suitable. I have been told by two, at least three to rewrite my script for children script in mind.
At first, I struggled with the idea of "why me..." then, as I can see it, it was in the back of mind for the longest time. Yeah, yeah... I'm a idiot!
The concept of a woman (female) pirate trapped in time, ready to spring out in the present to put all the things wrong in her life back to proper order.
Now, you are problably thinking, how can she if her family that she knew is dead and buried? Well, she has kin, right! YEAH!!!!
So, in respect of that, a comment suggested that she would be trapped in time by being placed in a mirror. I like... no love the idea. It avoids the time travel of the present character... and gives me the opportunity to release the gal and let her run amonk to set things right.
Then I thought, to make this a family type of script, I would need what two people call:
the sweet spot. Ages 8-12. or Tweens....
Okay, that's fine with me. So, now to create a plot and purpose of all of this to make it enjoyable. I like the struggle of coming up with an idea, something that brings it out with a moral. But, I like to get opinions on what others think. Please? Tell me if you think the plot - story would work. Starting what I have below.
Here's what I have in mind.
Pirate Captain (Woman) trapped in a small mirror by a curse from her first mate Whitehall, right after she comes back from burying the hidden (loot)treasure that they stole. Her son, (only son) is disturbed that she neglected him all his life, never paid him any attention, is now happy that she died, or at least that's what he believes, (that she died). He tosses the mirror out into sea, merely months after he is safe on land, and she's trapped inside.
Later, in the present. The pirate's descendants, a mother and daughter arrive into town and is hired as a live-in maid by the Whitehall estate. Neither are aware of their true past history of being a Kubrick. The daughter is 12, named Rachel has been neglected from her workaholic, ill mother; Martha. Little Rachel befriends a neighbor in school and is warn about old woman Whitehall and her two evil grandson's, David and Harry. While old woman Whitehall fights with Bernard her brother over the estate, he hires two bumbling idiotic thugs to search his sister's estate for the hidden treasure she claims she found.
Meanwhile, Rachel discovers in the mirror the pirate, Captain Alyson Kubrick. She tells her mother, who believes she's crazy. The boys think it funny, and begin to intimidate her with evil dirty tricks, playing games and such. But Alyson convinces Rachel and Ben that if she would to find the pocket mirror and the red book in the Whitehall's library she could be free and help her to restore their family lineage.
Rachel goes on a quest to do this, getting caught by the servants and reporting her to Mrs. Whitehall. She's warned. While, the bumbling thugs begin to dig up the back yard near the coast, they believe they found the treasure, but an accident happens and they fall over the cliffs and land in the ocean.
Martha Kubrick becomes furious with Rachel and punishes her without supper. The next day, Ben tells her what David and Harry did to her mother, by trying to poison her with food. Martha gets sick and is rushed to the hospital, giving the boys the opportunity to do more harm to Rachel. While Alyson, summons her to the library and locate the book. She does, and finds the curse and the way to restore the pirate descendant.
As Bernard visits his sister in threat that she hands over the estate, she forbids his request as his bumbling thugs come in to report they found the treasure. Mrs. Whitehall doesn't believe them, and goes upstairs to get her pocket mirror when she finds Rachel taking it. She escapes out the window of her bedroom and runs down to the cliff of the estates. Whitehall chases her, but Rachel slides into the passage down into the caverns as Alyson pointed out and with the items from the red book releases Alyson from the mirror.
Now, the confrontation between the thugs, Mrs. Whitehall and her brother are faced off with Alyson Kubrick who is a live and well...
Can anyone tell me if this works or not. It's a brain storm idea, and still in the works. If it has potential, let me know, anyone. I am open for suggestions. Nothing is set in concrete or stone.
At first, I struggled with the idea of "why me..." then, as I can see it, it was in the back of mind for the longest time. Yeah, yeah... I'm a idiot!
The concept of a woman (female) pirate trapped in time, ready to spring out in the present to put all the things wrong in her life back to proper order.
Now, you are problably thinking, how can she if her family that she knew is dead and buried? Well, she has kin, right! YEAH!!!!
So, in respect of that, a comment suggested that she would be trapped in time by being placed in a mirror. I like... no love the idea. It avoids the time travel of the present character... and gives me the opportunity to release the gal and let her run amonk to set things right.
Then I thought, to make this a family type of script, I would need what two people call:
the sweet spot. Ages 8-12. or Tweens....
Okay, that's fine with me. So, now to create a plot and purpose of all of this to make it enjoyable. I like the struggle of coming up with an idea, something that brings it out with a moral. But, I like to get opinions on what others think. Please? Tell me if you think the plot - story would work. Starting what I have below.
Here's what I have in mind.
Pirate Captain (Woman) trapped in a small mirror by a curse from her first mate Whitehall, right after she comes back from burying the hidden (loot)treasure that they stole. Her son, (only son) is disturbed that she neglected him all his life, never paid him any attention, is now happy that she died, or at least that's what he believes, (that she died). He tosses the mirror out into sea, merely months after he is safe on land, and she's trapped inside.
Later, in the present. The pirate's descendants, a mother and daughter arrive into town and is hired as a live-in maid by the Whitehall estate. Neither are aware of their true past history of being a Kubrick. The daughter is 12, named Rachel has been neglected from her workaholic, ill mother; Martha. Little Rachel befriends a neighbor in school and is warn about old woman Whitehall and her two evil grandson's, David and Harry. While old woman Whitehall fights with Bernard her brother over the estate, he hires two bumbling idiotic thugs to search his sister's estate for the hidden treasure she claims she found.
Meanwhile, Rachel discovers in the mirror the pirate, Captain Alyson Kubrick. She tells her mother, who believes she's crazy. The boys think it funny, and begin to intimidate her with evil dirty tricks, playing games and such. But Alyson convinces Rachel and Ben that if she would to find the pocket mirror and the red book in the Whitehall's library she could be free and help her to restore their family lineage.
Rachel goes on a quest to do this, getting caught by the servants and reporting her to Mrs. Whitehall. She's warned. While, the bumbling thugs begin to dig up the back yard near the coast, they believe they found the treasure, but an accident happens and they fall over the cliffs and land in the ocean.
Martha Kubrick becomes furious with Rachel and punishes her without supper. The next day, Ben tells her what David and Harry did to her mother, by trying to poison her with food. Martha gets sick and is rushed to the hospital, giving the boys the opportunity to do more harm to Rachel. While Alyson, summons her to the library and locate the book. She does, and finds the curse and the way to restore the pirate descendant.
As Bernard visits his sister in threat that she hands over the estate, she forbids his request as his bumbling thugs come in to report they found the treasure. Mrs. Whitehall doesn't believe them, and goes upstairs to get her pocket mirror when she finds Rachel taking it. She escapes out the window of her bedroom and runs down to the cliff of the estates. Whitehall chases her, but Rachel slides into the passage down into the caverns as Alyson pointed out and with the items from the red book releases Alyson from the mirror.
Now, the confrontation between the thugs, Mrs. Whitehall and her brother are faced off with Alyson Kubrick who is a live and well...
Can anyone tell me if this works or not. It's a brain storm idea, and still in the works. If it has potential, let me know, anyone. I am open for suggestions. Nothing is set in concrete or stone.
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