best way to format this scene??

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  • best way to format this scene??

    I have Erica and Dan, who are dating. Erica is hispanic and she's bringing Dan to her niece's birthday party and introducing him to her large family for the first time. Basically I envision the dialogue something like this:

    ERICA
    This is my cousin Manuel

    DAN
    Nice to meet you.

    MANUEL
    Mucho gusto

    ERICA
    This my Aunt Rosa

    DAN
    Hello.

    AUNT ROSA
    mucho gusto


    and so on..... It's a comedy script and the funny part of this scene is that Dan is meeting a crapload of cousins, aunts, uncles, etc. I could see two pages of "much gusto's" but I'm not sure if that's how I should write it. I could describe the scene in a couple paragraphs instead?

    any comments?

    thanks
    m.toomey
    If Lindsey Lohan has a child, and that child will lead...I will follow.

  • #2
    Re: best way to format this scene??

    Lots of possible ways to go here. Are we ever going to see or hear from any of these people you're introducing once this scene is over?

    "We're all immigrants now, man."
    - Zia (Patrick Fugit), "Wristcutters: A Love Story"

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    • #3
      Re: best way to format this scene??

      nope, they won't be heard from again.
      If Lindsey Lohan has a child, and that child will lead...I will follow.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: best way to format this scene??

        If that's the joke, go for the joke. I'd keep it at a page, though. There's a point where we get the joke... and I'd *add* to the joke. Escalate it.

        - Bill
        Free Script Tips:
        http://www.scriptsecrets.net

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        • #5
          Re: best way to format this scene??

          Personally, I'd go with succinct and after the first introduction try something like:

          Dan is introduced to the rest of the family, a gauntlet of "Mucho Gustos".

          Although I suppose you could go with a montage.
          "Forget it, Jake. It's Hollywood."

          My YouTube channel.

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          • #6
            Re: best way to format this scene??

            good tips, thanks all.

            m.toomey
            If Lindsey Lohan has a child, and that child will lead...I will follow.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: best way to format this scene??

              Write it so it's funny on the page.

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