On the Nose Dialogue

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  • On the Nose Dialogue

    What is it, how do you avoid it?

    So far what I get is don't be like,

    Character A: "I am going to the store."
    Character B: "Can you pick me up something?"
    Character A: "What do you need?"
    Character B: "Eggs"
    Character A: "Okay. Bye"
    Character B: "Bye"

    Anything else I am missing??
    The Best Impersonation of Christian Bale Freak Out!!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fd5631H6KuE

  • #2
    Re: On the Nose Dialogue

    A; I'm going to store.

    B: Can you pick me up something?

    A: What do you need?

    B: Eggs.

    A: What do you need eggs for? You're a vegetarian.

    B: There's different kinds of vegs. There's lactos--. Look just pick me up some damn eggs.

    A: Fine.

    B: And bring me back my change. Bye.
    "I ask every producer I meet if they need TV specs they say yeah. They all want a 40 inch display that's 1080p and 120Hz. So, I quit my job at the West Hollywood Best Buy."
    - Screenwriting Friend

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    • #3
      Re: On the Nose Dialogue

      I avoid this by using Via the Mouth dialogue
      TimeStorm & Blurred Vision Book info & blog: https://stormingtime.com//

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      • #4
        Re: On the Nose Dialogue

        A; I'm going to store.

        B: Can you pick me up something?

        A: What do you need?

        B: Eggs.

        A: Oh, right. Eggs.

        B: That's just typical of you.

        A: What?

        B: Why do I have to ask? You should know what we need. You open the fridge how many times a day and you don't notice we need eggs?

        A: Christ, I'll get the eggs. What the hell?

        B: Don't raise your voice at me! We need more than just eggs! If you can't figure that out, don't come back at all.

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        • #5
          Re: On the Nose Dialogue

          On the nose dialogue mostly refers to lack of subtext; that is, people saying exactly what's on their mind, or stating the obvious.

          DR. ROGERS
          As you know, Dr. Parker, we are scientists working on a top-secret project.

          DR. PARKER
          You think I don't know that?

          DR. ROGERS
          Today I am very happy because at long last the time has arrived for our crucial experiment that will either prove my theory correct or blow up the world.

          DR. PARKER
          Look, did you hit your head getting into your car again? Why are you telling me all this?
          Patrick Sweeney

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          • #6
            Re: On the Nose Dialogue

            A: You're so beautiful.
            P: It's because I'm so in love.
            A: No, it's because I'm so in love with you.
            Everybody else: barf.
            Chicks Who Script podcast

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            • #7
              Re: On the Nose Dialogue

              A: I'm going to the store.

              B: Can you pick up some eggs?

              A: Eggs, okay.

              B: Be sure to say hi to that cheap floozy you've been cheating on me with.

              A: Should I pick you up some more gin? That fifth you keep in the dishwasher is almost empty.

              B: I hope you die in a car wreck.

              A: So do I.

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              • #8
                Re: On the Nose Dialogue

                For me, it's as simple as following just one rule...

                People never say exactly what they mean, unless they are lying.

                There's usually a motivation behind words, a desire to get something, and it'd most often be both humiliating and counterproductive to communicate that.

                "I love you" might actually mean "I want you to show me affection." "I hate you" might actually mean "I want to hurt you the way you hurt me." But saying exactly what you mean won't have the desired effect.

                The trick is to convey true feelings either through action, or through forcing someone into a situation where they must reveal something embarrassing to order to achieve a deeper goal hidden from others.

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                • #9
                  Re: On the Nose Dialogue

                  I don't buy the notion that people don't say what they mean, we say what we mean all the time, however, a lot of the time it is quite boring and you cannot afford to have boring dialogue in film. The main thing for me is to not waste script pages with dialogue that:

                  -isn't smart
                  -isn't funny
                  -doesn't move the plot forward
                  -doesn't reveal character
                  -doesnt have subtext or irony
                  -doesn't reinforce the theme of the work
                  -is pure exposition, i.e. something one character says for the sake of the audience, not the character being spoken to (e.g., Did you talk to Stella, our mother who is dying of tuberculosis and who abused us as children and who is now trying to reconnect after twenty years?)


                  Depending on the genre, there is more or less leniency re. the above list. Personally, because of the films I like, I believe dialogue can exist for the sake of dialogue, that for me can be an isolated pleasure that stands on its own when well done, for the pure enjoyment of well crafted words flying across the screen. But it should still reveal something about character dynamics, even in a story that is less plot driven than say, a thriller or action script.

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                  • #10
                    Re: On the Nose Dialogue

                    As in all things writing, in dialogue are no limits.

                    As long as it all fits together.

                    Good writers always reinvent writing so it fits their personality.

                    I have seen on the nose-style dialogue in good books, but it worked well with the rest.

                    I'm not very impressed by "don'ts".

                    I'm more impressed how a writer puts whatever he needs together and creates a style of his own.
                    "Ecco il grande Zampano!"

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                    • #11
                      Re: On the Nose Dialogue

                      Code:
                      A: Where are you going?
                      
                      B: Just going to run out and pick up something for breakfast.
                      
                      A: But we have breakfast food here. Eggs, bacon - 
                      
                      B: I was thinking about bagels or some cereal.
                      
                      A: Cereal...because that's what all the adults eat these days - 
                      
                      B: And fruit. It's good for you. 
                      
                      A: Says who?
                      
                      B: Tom.
                      
                      A: Jesus, Pam. You talk to my doctor more than I do.
                      What is that conversation about?

                      Even though the characters are discussing what to eat for breakfast, the subtext is B looking out for A's health because A doesn't seem to be going that on his own. B loves A and wants him to stay healthy.

                      On The Nose dialogue is when characters are talking about what is happening. If you can deliver the same info without dialogue, then don't use dialogue.

                      Code:
                      A: Why can't we just eat eggs and bacon like always?
                      
                      B: Because I want you to stay healthy, John. I love you.
                      What is that conversation about?

                      Exactly what they are talking about.

                      People don't care for OTN dialogue because it's straightforward information. Nothing dynamic about it at all.

                      Subtextual dialogue, on the other hand, is fun for the reader/viewer because it allows them to play along and see the true meaning behind the words.

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                      • #12
                        Re: On the Nose Dialogue

                        What Bio said (subtext) and also dialogue that is distinctive to the chartacter and no one else. It's *specific*. Lots of OTN dialogue is generic instead of specific. You want to zero in on the details.

                        - Bill
                        Free Script Tips:
                        http://www.scriptsecrets.net

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                        • #13
                          Re: On the Nose Dialogue

                          Check out alotta flicks/scripts that are heavy on dialogue yet hold your interest. I just watched sex, lies, and videotape for the first time in awhile. That's a good example.

                          Usually the ping pong thing with dialogue starts with something trivial that bubbles into something having to do with the film's theme(s).
                          "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you."
                          -Maya Angelou

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                          • #14
                            Re: On the Nose Dialogue

                            "Mad Men" has excellent dialogue.

                            Probably the best dialogue that you can hear currently in both film and TV.
                            "Ecco il grande Zampano!"

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                            • #15
                              Re: On the Nose Dialogue

                              Jack: Oh, Jill. Why do you look at me like that?
                              Jill: Well, Jack. I was thinking about the day we met. Two years ago today. And the day we married one year later.
                              Jack: Oh, yes. My brother John introduced us. John who had that limp from that incurable disease he contracted working undercover in Afghanistan.
                              Jill: And you had just invented that new medicine to heal incurable diseases contracted overseas but it was too late to save your brother John.
                              Jack: I've felt so guilty about that ever since.
                              Jill: Your brother would have wanted you to move on and I'm proud that you have and that you've won the Nobel Prize yesterday.
                              Jack: Oh, Jill.
                              Jill: Oh, Jack.

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