Fast, slick and exciting

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  • Fast, slick and exciting

    are there rules for writing action sequences?
    I'm having a hard time with something...

  • #2
    Re: Fast, slick and exciting

    Yep. Write them fast, slick, and exciting.

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    • #3
      Re: Fast, slick and exciting

      I've had some positive comments on my action sequences so I'll share my method.

      1. Have a plan. Picture the sequence in your mind or plot it on paper, whatever works for you.

      2. Begin the sequence on the page. Use action words (leap, thrust, bolt, impale, duck, spin, etc.) and words that generate action sounds (staccato, burst, snake, side-to-side, etc.), but don't get carried away. Just substitute these words for other words with less impact (run, walk, dodge, jump, etc.).

      3. Throw in those sound effects, just don't use a slug for them. You're setting a pace, you don't want slugs slowing things down. If your protag is strolling down the street and a shotgun goes off, start a new line with BLAM! Capitalize it, draw attention to it, but don't bother using a SOUND: slug. It gets the reader's attention and raises the excitement of the read. Of course, you do NOT want to overuse this. Be cool.

      3. Throw up obstacles. Protag does this BUT this happens SO hero does this BUT that happens SO hero does this instead AND that happens SO hero can do this BUT didn't expect that, etc. ad nauseum, until the action resolves.

      4. Every step in the sequence should be on its own line. You don't want your action to be in a block on the page and neither does the reader. You want to generate a quick pace, raise the excitement, and keep the reader engaged. Don't worry about how much or how little ends up on a certain page, it all works out in the end and you'll impress readers with the white space.

      5. When you're done, read it. If you find your breathing getting a little shallower, your reading a little faster, your heart a little louder as you read, then it's mission accomplished.

      For example:

      John stands in front of the store window engrossed as the CHOCOLATIER (38) dips skewered strawberries under the waterfall of rich, dark chocolate. The chocolatier looks up and smiles, but the smile turns to a frown as he looks past John.

      BLAM! The window shatters and the chocolatier's white coat turns red. He drops like a sack of meat.

      John recoils, screaming and clutching his left ear. Looks up--

      A man wearing a SNOW WHITE mask and a tattered overcoat slowly brings the shotgun to bear on him.

      John, paralyzed, as the double-barrel fills his view.

      CRACK! A gunshot zings off the mailbox behind Snow White. He turns, raising the shotgun--

      John scrambles to his feet and skitters away. Bounces off a parked car, his balance messed up from the close blast.

      The shotgun splits the air again but he doesn't look back. Runs into the intersection--

      A GARBAGE TRUCK veers, tires screeching, just avoids hitting him. He shuffles onto the sidewalk, finally looks back.

      The street is calm. People walk casually, cars are moving, like nothing happened.
      Last edited by ReneC; 10-29-2011, 09:32 AM.
      Vancouver Screenwriters Meetup Group

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      • #4
        Re: Fast, slick and exciting

        Great post, Rene.

        Check this out, FFMM: http://johnaugust.com/2009/writing-better-action

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        • #5
          Re: Fast, slick and exciting

          Originally posted by Why One View Post
          Yep. Write them fast, slick, and exciting.

          ...so not girly. Got it.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Fast, slick and exciting

            I've had some positive comments on my action sequences so I'll share my method.

            1. Have a plan. Picture the sequence in your mind or plot it on paper, whatever works for you.

            2. Begin the sequence on the page. Use action words (leap, thrust, bolt, impale, duck, spin, etc.) and words that generate action sounds (staccato, burst, snake, side-to-side, etc.), but don't get carried away. Just substitute these words for other words with less impact (run, walk, dodge, jump, etc.).


            You're a sweetheart Rene, thank you. Part of the above sounds a little sexual but hey, it's all action, right LOL
            You now how they say 'write what you know' well I'm writing a sic fi space action thing and I can't exactly steal the words from Star Trek so I panicked a little. Thank you for this post however, it is VERY informative. Hugz for that.

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            • #7
              Re: Fast, slick and exciting

              What I've noticed from reading fellow writers' work is that sometimes writers lose track of their scene / characters in an action packed sequence with a lot happening at once.

              For example, if you have 5 people in a fight scene, you need to know at all time where each character is spatially, what they're doing and how they're reacting to what's happening, so that the reader can really picture it. Who's punching, who's screaming, who's doubling over in agony, who's fainting in the background at the sight of such violence, who's walking out of the bathroom with shock on their face, etc. You have to keep full control of the physical and dramatic space you've created and know how action and reaction are unfolding across that space.

              Even if the director then cuts the scene so fast the viewers won't have a clue as to what's happening

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              • #8
                Re: Fast, slick and exciting

                In 2 weeks I'll have a book on it...

                One that doesn't cost $400 on Amazon or sell for $999 used on Ebay.

                Until then - an action scene is a character scene.
                An action scene uses reversals to keep it exciting.
                An action scene is a story scene - if you can remove it and the story still works, *remove it*.

                - Bill
                Free Script Tips:
                http://www.scriptsecrets.net

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                • #9
                  Re: Fast, slick and exciting

                  Chek ur eek-mail. It may help?

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                  • #10
                    Re: Fast, slick and exciting

                    I would also add to look for a new unique twist that hasn't been seen before. A lot of times this gets patently ridiculous, but that seems to be what sells.

                    Two guys fight. Boring.

                    Two guys fight after knocking a tank of poisonous cobras all over the place... less boring.
                    Hell of a Deal -- Political Film Blog

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                    • #11
                      Re: Fast, slick and exciting

                      Originally posted by polfilmblog View Post
                      I would also add to look for a new unique twist that hasn't been seen before. A lot of times this gets patently ridiculous, but that seems to be what sells.

                      Two guys fight. Boring.

                      Two guys fight after knocking a tank of poisonous cobras all over the place... less boring.
                      Well, if you're writing for Jackie Chan you leave it at 'two guys fight' :P He will decide on what the fight is

                      Anyway, thanks everybody. My second question is - this excerpt bellow - do you cap the green light since it's something that never happens on Earth - since we don't wear astronaut suits?

                      -----
                      SNOW WHITE
                      I don't have a pass.

                      MUNCHKIN
                      She's Snow White

                      BUS DRIVER
                      You're the major's kid?

                      Snow White nods in agreement.

                      BUS DRIVER cont'd

                      All right. Lock in.

                      Snow White locks in her suit next to munchkin boy. As soon as the green lights indicate all passenger suits are locked in, the bus doors slide closed and the bus lifts off.

                      -----

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                      • #12
                        Re: Fast, slick and exciting

                        In your example I'd suggest the green light implies what its purpose is and you don't need to explain it. I also wouldn't capitalize it.

                        Snow White locks in her suit next to munchkin boy. The light flips to green, the doors close and the bus takes off.
                        Vancouver Screenwriters Meetup Group

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