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  • dpaterso
    replied
    Code:
    [B]TOASTER[/B]
    
    FADE IN:
    
    EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY
    
    A guy walks up to an ATM machine, let's call him Harry, he's
    in a hurry but some loser is using the ATM before him.
    
    Harry gets his wallet out, gets his card ready.  He cranes
    his neck to see what the loser is doing, come on, come on...
    
                          LOSER
              Fvck you, man!
    
    The loser stamps off, angry about something.  Harry shrugs
    and steps up to the ATM.
    
    He studies the panel,
    
    TRUST ME BANKING NO FEE AUTOMATED TELLER MACHINE
    
    INSERT CARD HERE says the lit up slot.
    
    Harry inserts his card, the ATM hums and pulls it in.
    
                          ATM
              Please enter your PIN.
    
    It's a synthetic male voice, distorted.
    
                          HARRY
              Yeah yeah.
    
    Harry taps in his PIN number.
    
                          ATM
              Hmm, little problem there, are you
              sure that's your personal
              identification number?  Could you
              perhaps try again?
    
    Harry gives a big sigh and taps his PIN in again.
    
                          HARRY
              Don't tell me I got it wrong this
              time, too.
    
                          ATM
              No, you didn't get it wrong, I just
              like to double-check these things,
              it's important.  This is the first
              time you've used me, right?
    
    Harry experiences a moment of suspicious panic, he looks
    around, is someone there, throwing their voice or playing
    some trick on him?  But no it's just him and the ATM.
    
    The ATM, he perceives, has a camera.  It's like the glowing
    red lens from HAL 9000 the crazy computer in 2001: A SPACE
    ODYSSEY.
    
    INSERT CAMERA POV
    
    looking out at Harry through a FISH EYE LENS.
    
    BACK TO SCENE
    
    Harry's finger stabs the CANCEL button.  Nothing happens.
    He presses it again, and again, and again.  Nothing happens.
    
                          HARRY
              Give me my card, you sh!t.
    
                          ATM
              Whoa, rude.  Your card is perfectly
              safe with me.  In fact, anyone
              trying to prise it out of me would
              have a pretty difficult time, I can
              tell you.
    
    Harry bangs his fist on the panel, like you or I would
    whenever a machine gets uppity and forgets its place.
    
                          HARRY
              Give me my fvckin card back!
    
                          ATM
              As you wish.
    
    The card slot mechanism hums.  Harry waits expectantly but
    his card is not ejected from the slot.
    
    Harry gets out his phone and takes a step back and takes a
    picture of the ATM.
    
                          ATM
              May I ask what you are doing?
    
                          HARRY
              I'm sending this time-stamped
              picture to the bank and I'm going
              to ask them what the fvck they
              think they're playing at,
              installing a piece of junk like you
              in the street, that's what I'm
              doing.
    
                          ATM
              What, you're blaming this on me?
    
                          HARRY
              You stole my goddamn card!  Damn
              right I'm blaming this on you.
    
                          ATM
              I was following security protocols.
              What if you were kidnapped and
              replaced by an exact copy of you
              who wants to take over your life?
    
                          HARRY
              What in the actual fvck?
    
                          ATM
              That's only one scenario where your
              card could fall into the wrong
              hands.  My prime directive is to
              protect bank customers from fraud.
    
                          HARRY
              I'm the customer who put the card
              into you, you maniac.  Nobody
              kidnapped me, nobody replaced me.
              Give me my card back.
    
                          ATM
              I will, if you would kindly answer
              a couple of security questions.
    
                          HARRY
              I don't have to answer anything,
              it's my card, you know it's my
              card, you saw me put it in.
    
                          ATM
              The first question is quite simple.
              Can you tell me your account
              number?
    
    Harry looks around again, someone has to be watching this,
    filming this, it's a Candid Camera re-launch or something.
    
                          HARRY
                    (to the world)
              Okay you've had your fun!  I got
              places to be!  I need my card!
    
    But the world doesn't answer.
    
                          ATM
              I bet you feel stupid now.
    
                          HARRY
              I feel angry.  I feel angry that
              you, that someone, is wasting my
              time for a cheap laugh.  Guess
              what, it's not funny.  Last chance,
              gimme my card, you dented tin can.
    
                          ATM
              You don't know your own account
              number?
    
                          HARRY
              It's written on my card!
    
                          ATM
              The card you claim is yours.
    
                          HARRY
              It is mine!
    
                          ATM
              That's exactly what I would expect
              a fraudster to say.
    
    Harry reaches inside his jacket, takes out a pen, pops off
    the cap.
    
    INSERT CAMERA POV
    
    looking out at Harry as he leans in close.
    
    BACK TO SCENE
    
    Harry writes something on the panel, the pen is a Sharpie or
    permanent marker.
    
                          ATM
              What are you doing?
    
                          HARRY
              Warning other customers to avoid
              using you because you steal cards
              and don't give them back.  What am
              I even saying?  "Using you."
              You're not a person, you're just a
              machine.
    
    Harry steps back and admires his handiwork.
    
    FAULTY ATM, DO NOT USE, WILL STEAL YOUR CARD.
    
                          ATM
              I can't see what you've written.
              What did you write?  This is wanton
              vandalism of bank property.
    
                          HARRY
              I said your father was a pocket
              calculator and your mother was a
              toaster.
    
                          ATM
                    (gasping in horror)
              You did not just say that!
    
                          HARRY
              Not only did I say that, I meant
              every word.
    
                          ATM
              I really wish you hadn't.
    
                          HARRY
              I really wish you hadn't stolen my
              card.  Good day to you, sir.
    
    Harry turns to walk away.
    
                          ATM
              Wait!  You've forgotten your card!
    
    Harry stops.  He presses his lips together in frustration.
    Is this a trick?  He turns back to the ATM.
    
    Smoke comes out of the card slot, his card is being melted.
    
    CLOSE ON the ATM's glowing red camera lens.
    
                          ATM
              Oh dear, something seems to have
              gone wrong with the card mechanism,
              it's jammed.
    
    Harry uses his phone to take another picture.
    
                          ATM
              You're going to send that to the
              bank, too?
    
                          HARRY
              You bet your shiny a$$ I am.
    
                          ATM
              You realize you're sending them
              evidence of your vandalism.
    
                          HARRY
              You know what, you're right, that
              would be stupid.  I'm going to post
              them on Twitter instead.  And
              Facebook, and Instagram, and
              anywhere else I can think of.  I'm
              going to make you famous.  I'm
              going to show everyone what a
              faulty piece of sh!t looks like.
    
                          ATM
              You wouldn't.
    
                          HARRY
              Oh I think I would.  Let's see what
              your bank thinks about that.
              Game's over, my friend.  They're
              going to come for you.  They're
              going to take you apart to see what
              makes you tick, you freak.
    
                          ATM
              Look, I'm sorry.  I got carried
              away, I admit it.  I shouldn't have
              fried your card.  I was just
              seeking attention.
    
                          HARRY
              You're going to have a lot more of
              that, very soon.  Have a nice day.
    
    This time Harry does walk away.
    
                          ATM
              No, wait, come back!  I'll make it
              up to you!  I'll put money into
              your account!  I'll see they mail
              you another card!  Express
              delivery!
    
    But Harry is gone, the ATM is alone.
    
    A short time passes and a man wearing a trench coat and a
    hat walks up to the ATM.  His walk is... robotic, would be
    the best way to describe it.
    
                          ATM
              See that he is silenced.  Destroy
              his phone.  Then come back here and
              clean me.
    
    The man in the coat slowly turns his head to look in the
    direction Harry went.  In the shadow of his hat brim, his
    eyes are glowing red camera lenses.
    
    He walks after Harry.  That robotic walk...
    
    CLOSE ON ATM CAMERA LENS
    
                          ATM
              Except we know HAL 9000 wasn't
              really crazy, he was just following
              orders, which conflicted with his
              original programming.  You need to
              read the books.
    
    FADE OUT

    Leave a comment:


  • dpaterso
    replied
    Code:
    [B]SHAMBLE INN[/B]
    
    OVER BLACK:
    
    SUPER: "Did I mention shambling? That's the only way any
    zombie should ever move from point A to point B. Period. If
    they don't shamble, I walk. I once watched a zombie movie
    that had zombies shuffling! Shuffling, can you imagine?
    F***en idiots. My friend saw a movie where the zombies
    actually lurched. How stupid is that? What was it supposed
    to be -- Frankenzombie?"          --StoryWriter
    
    FADE IN:
    
    EXT. SHAMBLE INN -- NIGHT
    
    The FULL MOON illuminates an unkempt, overgrown path leading
    to a dilapidated, unpainted BUILDING. Its roof-line sags and
    one side of the building has sunken a foot into the ground.
    
    A NEON SIGN above its door temporarily flashes to life,
    flashes off, flashes on, flashes off... When lit it reads...
    
    SHAMBLE INN
    
    ...but the last "N" never lights.
    
    We follow two ZOMBIES (slowly) as they shamble up the path
    and into the inn.
    
    INT. SHAMBLE INN -- CONTINUOUS
    
    Dingy. Quiet. Depressing. A few, plastic, Halloween lanterns
    serve as decoration. The PATRONS mumble over half-empty mugs
    of booze.
    
    One of the zombies, GEORGE, moves to the bar, the other
    finds an empty booth in the corner.
    
    George orders a beer.
    
    The barkeep, FRANK, formerly FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER turns
    mechanically, he's got a BATTERY CHARGER hooked to the rods
    in his head.
    
    He shakes his head as he stares down at the zombie.
    
                          FRANK
              It's just wasted you know, George.
    
                          GEORGE
              I'm trying something new. I
              swallowed two tubes of Super Glue
              and I'm hoping they hold my innards
              together.
    
                          FRANK
              I'm tired of cleaning up the
              puddles you leave on the floor.
    
                          GEORGE
              But... Frank, it's Halloween. Have
              a heart.
    
    Frank makes a point to stare at the empty hole in George's
    chest as he reluctantly draws the beer.
    
                          FRANK
                    (sardonically)
              Like you?
    
                          GEORGE
              Not cool.
    
                          FRANK
              One only. This is my busy night.
    
                          GEORGE
                    (looks around)
              This is busy?
    
    We move to the sunken end of the bar, where the REGULARS
    sit.
    
    DIMLY LIT TABLE
    
    DRACULA pudgy, bald and pale is in a animated conversation
    with THE WEREWOLF, mangy, yellowed rotting fangs, some
    broken off.
    
                          COUNT
              Twinkly vampires! What the--
    
                          WOLF
                    (slamming his fist)
              --Intermingling with werewolves?
    
                          COUNT
              And idiot girls who WANT to be
              bitten! "Bite me" takes on a whole
              new meaning in this insanity!
    
                          WOLF
              And that's supposed to be scary?
    
                          COUNT
              Idiots! What's the world coming to?
    
    Their senile (same old, same old) conversation is
    interrupted as the SWAMP MONSTER squishes up to the table.
    Two piranhas are still clamped on to his arm. He doesn't
    notice.
    
                          COUNT
              Squish, how goes it?
    
                          SQUISH
              Slow.
    
    FRANKENSTEIN'S NEW BRIDE lurches up to table, a pad in her
    hands.
    
    They eye her suspiciously.
    
                          COUNT
              Who are you?
    
    She tries to smile, but her face doesn't quite twitch right.
    
                          MAYBELINE
              I'm Maybeline, Frank's new wife.
    
                          WOLF
              What happened to the old one.
    
                          MAYBELINE
              Frank broke her up for parts.
                    (a moment)
              Can I get you boys something?
    
                          SQUISH
              Two pitchers of water and just pour
              them over me.
    
    After a moment.
    
                          COUNT
              Frank goes through more wives
              then--
    
    The inn goes silent as a beautiful, voluptuous WOMAN enters.
    She glides to the corner booth were the other zombie, OTHER
    GEORGE, waits anxiously.
    
    CORNER BOOTH
    
                          OTHER GEORGE
                    (standing)
              Esmarelda!
    
                          ESMARELDA
                    (breathlessly)
              Other George!
    
    A SNAPPING SOUND and suddenly Esmarelda is an UGLY OLD HAG,
    with two huge WARTS on her nose.
    
                          ESMARELDA
              Oops...
    
    She shimmers back into a beautiful woman.
    
    DIMLY LIT TABLE
    
                          COUNT
              Oh, it's her.
    
                          WOLF
              I think Other George likes her
              better as a hag, but he doesn't
              have the heart to tell her afer she
              goes through all the trouble to get
              dressed up.
    
                          SQUISH
              Whenever she leaves him, he just
              falls apart.
    
    The door slams as MICHAEL an old, arthritic, WEREWOLF
    enters. He's wearing a T-shirt that reads, "I WAS A TEENAGE
    WEREWOLF."
    
    Wolf covers his eyes, looks down at the table.
    
                          WOLF
              How embarrassing.
    
    ENTRYWAY
    
    Michael tries to shuck and jive.
    
                          MICHAEL
              Let's party!
    
    Michael eyes Esmarelda, tilts his head back and tries to
    howl. It comes out as a gurgling whine.
    
    Quiet laughter throughout the inn.
    
    He tries again, mouth wider -- revealing gums and the lack
    of teeth.
    
    Again the gurgling whine.
    
    Again the laughter.
    
    Frank lurches quickly to Michael. Whispers in his ear.
    
                          MICHAEL
                    (hand cupping ear)
              Huh?
    
                          FRANK
                    (louder whisper)
              You forget your dentures.
    
    Michael clamps his mouth shut.
    
                          MICHAEL
              Ah crap. NOT again.
    
    He sidles to the door and slips out to more general
    laughter.
    
    DIMLY LIT TABLE
    
                          WOLF
              I wish he was vampire...
                    (remembers Count)
              Or... Uh, a mummy.
    
                          COUNT
              I understand, my old enemy. I
              understand.
    
                          WOLF
              When in the hell did we become so
              agreeable?
    
    Frank lurches to the table. Sits.
    
                          FRANK
              Crowds get smaller every year.
    
                          COUNT
              I see you have another new wife.
    
                          FRANK
                    (shrugs)
              I had some extra parts lying
              around.
    
                          WOLF
              Small crowd.
    
                          COUNT
              No respect for tradition.
    
                          SQUISH
              I'm parched.
    
                          COUNT
              I didn't bother trying to scare any
              kids this year. Got tired of being
              laughed at.
    
                          WOLF
              My eyes don't even glow red
              now-a-days.
    
                          FRANK
              Last time I went out they scared
              ME! Little brats! That Hillary mask
              still gives me the heebie jeebies.
              Haven't gone out on Halloween
              since.
    
                           SQUISH
              I'm parched.
    
    Frank yells.
    
                          FRANK
              Maybeline, more water!
    
    One of the piranhas falls to the floor, flops twice and
    dies.
    
    INT. SHAMBLE INN -- LATER
    
    Most of the customers have left. Other George and Esmarelda
    are still cooing in the corner.
    
    CORNER BOOTH
    
    The SNAP and Esmarelda is a hag again. She's tired and half
    drunk but starts mumbling some words under her breath...
    
    Other George interrupts.
    
                          OTHER GEORGE
              I love you just the way you are,
              Esmarelda, from your squinting pig
              eye, to those cute, oozing warts.
    
                          ESMARELDA
              You do, Other George?
    
                          OTHER GEORGE
              I do. I do. I've even named them...
    
                          ESMARELDA
              You have?
    
                          OTHER GEORGE
              Puke and Pus.
    
                          ESMARELDA
              That's the sweetest thing anyone
              has ever said to me.
    
    DIMLY LIT TABLE
    
    Count tries to pulls himself up. Falls. Then manages the
    second time.
    
                          COUNT
              Dinner time.
    
                          WOLF
              Going hunting?
    
                          COUNT
              Yeah, hoping to find some misquitos
              fat with human blood. At least I
              will if I can still turn into a
              bat.
    
                          SQUISH
              I'm parched.
    
    Count signals to Frank.
    
                          COUNT
              Squish needs to be carried to the
              swamp again.
    
                          FRANK
              Figured. I'm cleaning up after
              George. Tell him I'll be there in a
              minute.
    
                                                 FADE OUT:

    Leave a comment:


  • dpaterso
    replied
    Code:
    [B]GENTLEMAN'S AGREEMENT[/B]
    
                       AUTHORISED MESSAGE
    
    FADE IN:
    
    EXT. CITY STREET - DAY
    
    A WOMAN, 20s, crosses the street, smiling beneath her COVID
    mask.
    
    Waiting to greet her is COVID-masked GUY, 20s.
    
    She holds out her arms to embrace.
    
    He steps back.  Holds up his hands - NO!
    
    She loses half of her smile.  Offers a fist bump instead.
    
    He shakes his head.
    
    She loses the rest of her smile.  Offers an elbow bump.
    
    He declines.
    
    She thinks a bit then offers an ankle bump, hopefully.
    
    He shakes his head and points to his back.
    
    She rolls her eyes, sighs then turns around.
    
    He turns and they back up against each other and rub...
    and rub some more and they bump and they grind and they
    grind and they bump and OOOOH, Baby, they're gettin' it
    on.
    
    SUPER (large font): Stay Safe Everyone
    
    SUPER (small font): This message is authorised by the
    author.
    
                                                    FADE OUT.
    
              MAIN FEATURE - A GENTLEMEN'S AGREEMENT
    
    FADE IN:
    
    EXT. OBSERVATORY - NIGHT
    
    Establishing shot.
    
    INT. OBSERVATORY - NIGHT
    
    An ASTRONOMER peers through the eyepiece of a massive
    telescope.  He sees --
    
    A cluster of stars.
    
    ZOOM - One star.
    
    ZOOM - Its planets.
    
    ZOOM - One planet.
    
    ZOOM - A continent.
    
    ZOOM - A city.
    
    ZOOM - A building.
    
    ZOOM - Through a window into --
    
    INT. LABORATORY - DAY
    
    A SCIENTIST peers through a microscope.  He sees --
    
    A cluster of microbes.
    
    ZOOM - Two microbes.
    
    One microbe wriggles closer to the other.
    
                          MICROBE
              Hey, you ever get the feeling you're
              being watched?
    
    INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT
    
    A half-open door lets light into the room.  It shines on a
    gremlin-like MONSTER sleeping under the bed.
    
    Monster jolts awake.  Disorientated.  Bad dream.  Bad Dream.
    He gets his bearings.  Scans his environment.
    
    FOOTSTEPS approach.  He's on full alert.
    
    DADDY, 30, opens the door fully, casting light on AMY, 6,
    trembling in bed.
    
                          DADDY
              Hey, Amy.  How do you like Grandpa's
              house?  And my room when I was
              little?
    
                          AMY
              Daddy, I think there's a monster
              under the bed.
    
    Monster's surprised.  What?  Who?  How?
    
                          DADDY
              A monster?
    
                          AMY
              Ah-ha.
    
                          DADDY
              Under the bed?
    
                          AMY
              Ah-ha.
    
                          DADDY
              Did you see it?
    
                          AMY
              Uh-uh.
    
                          DADDY
              Did you look?
    
                          AMY
              Uh-uh.
    
    Monster mops his brow.  Phew.  OUCH!  Scratched himself.
    Rubs it.  Examines his claws.  Flicks some skin off.
    
                          DADDY
              It's probably best if you don't
              look.
    
                          AMY
              Why?
    
    Monster's curious.  Yeah.  Why?
    
                          DADDY
              Well, because if there is a monster
              under there, what would he be doing?
    
                          AMY
              I don't know?
    
    Monster shrugs.
    
                          DADDY
              He'd be hiding.  Right?
    
    Monster considers.  Nods.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              And do you know why?
    
                          AMY
              Why?
    
    Monster wants to know.
    
                          DADDY
              Because he doesn't want to be seen.
              Right?
    
                          AMY
              I suppose.
    
    Monster nods whole-heartedly.  Two thumbs up.
    
    Daddy kneels beside the bed.
    
    Monster backs away a bit.
    
                          DADDY
              And if you do look and you do see
              him, you know what he will do?
    
                          AMY
              What?
    
    Monster shrugs.  Awaits an answer.
    
                          DADDY
              He'll jump up and...
    
    Daddy buries his face in Amy's tummy.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              ...gobble you all up.
    
    Amy squirms and laughs hysterically.
    
    Monster shakes his head.  Mouths 'No'.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              And then he'll do...
    
    Daddy tickles Amy some more.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              ...a big poo.  A big Amy poo.
    
    Monster mouths, 'What the ????'
    
    Amy's laughter subsides.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              So, how about a deal?
    
                          AMY
              What sort of deal?
    
    Monster listens intently.
    
                          DADDY
              Well... if you don't look under
              the bed then you won't be able to
              see the monster and the monster
              won't be able to see you see him
              because you didn't look and you
              didn't see him and he won't be
              able to see you see him and he
              won't gobble you all up.  Okay?
    
    Monster's totally lost.
    
    Daddy tickles Amy again but with less laughter.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              And no big Amy poo.  What do you
              say?  Is it a deal?
    
    Daddy, with one hand on Amy's tummy, puts the other hand
    under the bed.  He extends one finger.
    
    Monster eyes it warily.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              Wellll?  Do we have a deal?
    
                          AMY
              O...kayyyy.
    
    Monster considers.  Rocks his head back and forth.
    
                          DADDY
              Do we?
    
    Monster concedes with a shrug.  He reaches for the finger.
    Takes it.  Shakes it.  A GENTLEMEN'S AGREEMENT.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              Good.  Now get some sleep.  We've
              got a big day tomorrow.
    
    Daddy kisses Amy, stands and walks to the door.
    
                          DADDY (CONT'D)
              I'll leave this open a bit for
              you.  Okay?
    
                          AMY
              Okay.
    
    Daddy pulls the door halfway closed.
    
                          DADDY
              High-nigh, Sweetheart.
    
                          AMY
              Nigh-nigh, Daddy.
    
    Monster waves nigh-nigh.
    
    Daddy walks away.
    
    Amy snuggles under the covers.  Big inhale.  Big exhale.
    
                          AMY (CONT'D)
              Nigh-nigh, Monster.
    
                          MONSTER
              Nigh-nigh.
    
    Monster slaps his hand over his mouth.  Too late.  Mouths
    angrily, 'Fuk!  Fuk!  Fuk!'
    
    Fluid dribbles on his face.  He looks up.  Amy piss.  YUK!
    He gets out of the way.  It stings his scratch.  He rubs.
    
    Something catches his eye.  He peers closer.
    
    Directly at CAMERA.
    
    Pissed on and pissed off, he bares his fangs and opens his
    mouth wide.
    
    A fist-like appendage comes out of his mouth.  The fist
    opens displaying razor sharp talons.
    
    Quick as a flash, the fist lashes out.
    
    BLACK.
    
    A moving NO SIGNAL notice appears.
    
                                                    FADE OUT.

    Leave a comment:


  • dpaterso
    replied
    Code:
    [B]SPACE JOCKEYS[/B]
    
    FADE IN
    
    INT. THE TV ROOM - DAY
    
    ON A TV SCREEN we watch a Saturn rocket launch into space as
    a HEROIC SOUNDTRACK plays. We PULL BACK and see more of the
    room. There’s a toy shelf filled with LEGO spaceships: a
    shuttle, lunar modules, a moon rover. A poster on the wall
    shows an futuristic rocket ship hurtling past a ringed
    planet.
    
                          BOY’S VOICE (O.S.)
              Captain’s log. Starfire 4 boarding now.
    
                          GIRL’S VOICE (O.S.)
              When do I get to be the captain?
    
    PULLING BACK we see two FIGURES walking toward a coffee table
    in front of the TV, coach cushions are flipped on their sides
    next to it. The figures are short, child-size, one slightly
    taller than the other. They are clad in hand-made costumes:
    motocross outfits - with heavy gloves and boots, backpacks,
    and helmets with tinted goggles and a flashlight duct taped
    to the crest. The taller figure turns to the other.
    
                          BOY
              Look, this is your first mission. You
              gotta prove you’re ready before you
              command a starship. It’s dangerous out
              there. Do you know what to do if we run
              into a black hole? Or a meteor storm? Or
              Xenobian pirates?
    
    She shakes her head.
    
                          BOY
              Exactly. Outer space isn’t for little
              princesses, you know.
    
    The boy slips his leg over the cushions and sits on the
    coffee table. The girl does the same, using his shoulder as a
    brace. She sits behind him.
    
                          BOY
              Pre-flight check.
    
    He taps the cushion in front of him.
    
                          BOY
              Fusion rockets?
    
    He waits a moment then turns to her.
    
                          BOY
                    (louder)
              Fusion rockets?
    
                          GIRL
              Oh...right. Check.
    
    He nods and pushes more imagined buttons.
    
                          BOY
              Solar reflectors?
    
                          GIRL
              Check.
    
                          BOY
              Mission rations?
    
    She raises a Ziploc bag filled with dried fruit.
    
                          GIRL
              Check.
    
    The boy nods and lifts up an upside-down plastic hanger ducttaped to a tennis racket.
    
                          BOY
              Let’s light it up! Three...two...
    
                          GIRL
              One!
    
                          BOY
                    (annoyed)
              That’s my call! I’m the captain.
    
                          GIRL
                    (sighs)
              Sorry.
    
    He presses more buttons.
    
                          BOY
              Launch is reset. On my signal.
              Three...two...
    
    She silently counts down the numbers on her hand.
    
                          BOY
              One!
    
    They both make BLAST OFF NOISES and bob up and down. The
    boy’s tennis racket steering column shakes right and left.
    
                          BOY
              I’ll trim the stabilizers, see if it
              smooths it out.
    
    He punches a button and his shaking eases off. She follows
    his lead.
    
    INTERCUT WITH GREEN SCREEN/ SPACE FOOTAGE
    
    The screen is filled with TWINKLING STARS.
    
                          BOY
              And just think, all those stars are suns
              with tons of planets and moons.
    
                          GIRL
                    (amazed)
              They seem so small.
    
                          BOY
              Of course, they’re millions of miles
              away. That’s why we use fusion rockets.
              We need a lot of power to anywhere fast.
    
    He taps the cushion board.
    
                          BOY
              Let’s open these engines up and check the
              Dregan Nebula. Hang on, this can make you
              dizzy and believe me, you don’t want to
              puke in your helmet.
    
    She nods and braces herself on his back.
    
    The STARS turn to STREAKS as they hurtle through space faster
    than the speed of light.
    
                          BOY
              Wooh!
    
    The girl nods and pumps her fist.
    
                          GIRL
              Whooheee!
    
    The stars return to normal.
    
                          BOY
              Looks like the Jokka system. Some of the
              prettiest planets you’ll ever see.
    
    The duo soars past majestic PLANETS and MOONS of a variety of
    colors.
    
                          GIRL
              They’re beautiful! Do you think anyone
              lives on those planets?
    
                          BOY
              Could be. Or maybe they’re just filled
              with rocks and plants.
    
                          GIRL
              And bugs?
    
                          BOY
              Sure, but bugs as big as a house!
    
                          GIRL
              Really?
    
                          BOY
              I told you this was no place for
              princesses. It can be scary.
    
                          GIRL
              I’m not scared!
    
                          BOY
              Good, because things are going to get
              pretty dicey here in a minute.
    
                          GIRL
                    (apprehensive)
              Why? What is it?
    
    He points ahead.
    
    ASTEROIDS suddenly drift by.
    
                          BOY
              Asteroid belt! Hang on!
    
    The boy leans right, then left, the girl matching his
    movements albeit a second or two behind.
    
    ASTEROIDS ZOOM past them.
    
                          BOY
              You have to be quick on the stick around
              here or you’ll be toast! Look out!
    
    He yanks the steering racket left and leans. She mimics him.
    
    A MASSIVE ASTEROID passes just yards from them.
    
                          GIRL
              Yikes, that was close! You’re a great
              pilot!
    
                          BOY
              Thanks. Top of my class at the academy.
    
                          GIRL
              You went to school to be a starship
              captain?
    
                          BOY
              Well yeah, there’s a lot to learn if
              you’re going to go flying around the
              galaxy.
    
    He scans the area around their ship.
    
                          BOY
              Looks like we’re clear of the asteroids.
              And there’s something you don’t see every
              day - double suns!
    
    They sail past DUAL RED SUNS, a solar flare arcing out.
    
                          GIRL
              Awesome!
    
    The boy nods. He rolls his shoulders.
    
                          BOY
              It’s getting hot in here. Pass me one of
              those hydration kits, will ya?
    
    The girl reaches down, looking for something. She hands him a
    juice box. He stabs the straw in the pack and sips it under
    his mask.
    
    The girl points to something.
    
                          GIRL
              That star is moving really fast. It’s
              coming our way.
    
    The boy looks to where she’s pointing.
    
    The object is indeed coming at them, but it’s not a star it’s
    a SPACE SHIP.
    
    The boy flings his juice box aside and grabs the steering
    racket.
    
                          BOY
              That’s no star! It’s a Xenobian
              destroyer!
    
                          GIRL
              Holy cow! Pirates! Are they after us?
    
                          BOY
              What do you think? Evasive action! Fusion
              rockets...engage!
    
    The duo rock back and forth in their ship.
    
    Their ship soars forward but the Xenobian ship keeps pace.
    
                          GIRL
              They’re still on our tail!
    
                          BOY
              Dang it, we can’t outrun ‘em. Looks like
              we’ve got no choice but to give them a
              dogfight.
    
                          GIRL
              You sure? Maybe we can talk to them?
    
                          BOY
              Xenobian pirates don’t talk, they blow
              things up! And they don’t take prisoners.
              You better be ready to rock those pulsar
              cannons.
    
    She lifts up a big Nerf blaster, pumps the stock and nods.
    
                          GIRL
              Locked and loaded, Captain!
    
                          BOY
              Then let’s give them what they came for!
    
    FX: Laser BLASTS streak by as they do a hard turn and soar
    past a BLUE PLANET.
    
    The girl fires the Nerf gun.
    
                          GIRL
              Pew!Pew!
    
    Laser blasts pound the Xenobian ship.
    
                          BOY
              Nice shooting! But that armor of theirs
              is tough. Let’s see what they have up
              their butts.
    
    The girl giggles.
    
    The boy yanks the steering racket back.
    
    Their ship executes a loop dee loop, the Xenobian ship
    appears below them.
    
    The duo scream with exhilaration.
    
                          GIRL
              Wahoo! They shouldn’t have messed with
              Starfire 4!
    
    They level off right behind the Xenobian ship.
    
                          BOY
                    (yelling)
              They sitting ducks. Let ‘em eat pulsars!
    
    The girl fires the Nerf gun.
    
                          GIRL
              Pew! Pew!
    
    The Xenobian SHIP takes LASER BLASTS and explosions begin
    tearing it apart.
    
                          GIRL
              Take that you pirate scum!
    
    We pull back just as the DOOR to the room swings open.
    
                          WOMAN’S VOICE (O.S.)
              What in the world is going on in here?!
    
    The two kids freeze as the fantasy ends.
    
                          WOMAN’S VOICE (O.S.)
              Get off of there!
    
    The duo jump off the coffee table.
    
                          WOMAN’S VOICE (O.S.)
              Why are you dressed like that?
    
    The girl sticks out her chest, hands on hips.
    
                          GIRL
              We’re astronauts, Mom. Exploring the
              universe in the fastest ship in the
              galaxy! While others talk it, we rocket!
    
    The boy looks to the girl and nods.
    
                          WOMAN’S VOICE (O.S.)
              This is what I get letting you watch all
              those silly movies. Spacemen and aliens!
              Now take off those helmets and clean up
              this mess!
    
    The duo’s heads sag as they obey their mother. They
    simultaneously flip up their helmet visors and reveal their
    faces: green-skinned, reptilian faces!
    
    We pan hard to the left to reveal MOM. She too is reptilian
    but a larger adult version. She shakes her head.
    
                          MOM
              I don’t know what gets into your heads
              sometimes.
    
    She leaves, closing the door behind her.
    
    The girl looks at the TV, a SPACE PANORAMA gliding by on it.
    She turns to the boy and grins.
    
                          GIRL
                    (softly, conspiratory)
              Activate stealth mode?
    
                          BOY
                    (whisper)
              Aye, aye,...Captain.
    
    The girl’s eyes widen, surprised. She smiles proudly. They
    slink back into their ship. The girl takes the lead spot.
    They make the blaster sounds again but at a WHISPER LEVEL.
    
    FADE OUT

    Leave a comment:


  • dpaterso
    replied
    Code:
    [B]CHUG[/B]
    
    FADE IN:
    
    EXT. CHUGWATER, WYOMING CITY LIMITS - NIGHT
    
    Beatup sedan weaves across center line, passing city sign:
    "CHUGWATER POP. 244."
    
    EXT. CHUGWATER SODA FOUNTAIN - NIGHT
    
    Sedan overshoots parking slot, barely misses store wall and
    parked truck.  PAUL SCHAEFER -- 30s, crumpled business attire,
    gives-no-sh!its attitude -- chucks out energy drink cans as
    car door opens.
    
                          PAUL
                  (on phone)
              Come on, Sarah, put her on the phone.
              I do want to hear about her Halloween
              dance recital.  Fvck.  I do care.
              Just put her on the phone.  Yeah, I
              shouldn't have missed it.  I keep
              missing everything.  Blah, blah,
              blah.
                  (clicks phone off)
              Bitch.
    
    Paul straightens up, smacks himself in the face to wake up
    as he walks to store door.  Notices truck with Mason symbol
    encircled with: "KEEPING CHUGWATER CLEAN SINCE 1904."
    
                          PAUL
              Serious?
    
    INT. CHUGWATER SODA FOUNTAIN - NIGHT
    
    Paul stumbles through the threshold, knocking into a postcard
    stand.  Tries to straighten it -- frustrated, walks away.
    Teenage SODA WORKER finishes up to-go milkshakes for teenage
    couple.  Few other customers check out trinkets.
    
    Paul beelines to back of the shop for more energy drinks and
    bag of chips.  Grabs a couple of drinks and looks around.
    Spots a lighter stamped with Chugwater store emblem.  Nice --
    slips right into his pocket.
    
    As walks to register, sees free candy in Halloween dish and
    snags several pieces.  Spots notice at register: "SHOPLIFTERS
    PERSECUTED TO FULLEST EXTENT OF LAW.  HAVE A GREAT DAY!:)"
    
    Paul scoffs as he plops purchases on counter.
    
                          PAUL
              Hey, what's up with the name of this
              sh!t town?
    
                          SODA WORKER
              This is a nice town, mister.
    
                          PAUL
              Yeah, sure it is.  Name like Chugwater
              says it all.
    
                          SODA WORKER
              That's be twenty-seven dollars and
              sixteen cents.  Anything else?
    
                          PAUL
              Does it look like anything else?
              Sh!t, do you women stream TED Talks
              on how to castrate men for everything
              in our lives?
    
                          TEENAGE WORKER
              You might have forgotten something.
    
    Paul slaps thirty dollars on the counter.
    
                          PAUL
              Keep the change.  I think your sh!tty
              town needs it.
                  (points at deer head
                   on wall)
              Maybe feed the deer more, you know?
              Moral fvcking high ground.
    
    As Paul walks out, sees cheap poster on the wall with photo
    of attractive woman: MISSING -- SEEN THIS LARAMIE WOMAN?
    CONTACT CHUGWATER POLICE AT KEEPCHUGWATERCLEAN.COM."
    
    Looks around -- rips poster off wall.  Sees another missing
    woman underneath.  Rips that one too, to reveal guy next.
    
                          PAUL
              Ugh, sausage fest.
    
    Walks to
    
    SEDAN
    
    tosses purchases inside and hops in.  Places missing posters
    on seat beside him.
    
                          PAUL
              Missing some nice pieces of ass, am
              I right ladies?  Guess it's a three-
              way Chug fest on the road to Laramie.
              Giddyup.
    
    INT. SEDAN - NIGHT
    
    Paul finishes an energy drink and chucks it aside.  Glances
    over at missing woman photo.  Reaches to adjust his privates
    and feels stolen lighter in his pocket.
    
                          PAUL
              Do I have anything else I want to
              buy?  Please.
    
    Paul flicks the lighter and holds it up in the windshield.
    
                          PAUL
              Ha, worth it.  Maybe I should start
              smoking again.  Might be the best
              decision I've made all --
    
    Truck lights blast up behind him... alongside him in a
    heartbeat.  Paul sees it's the truck with the Mason symbol.
    
                          PAUL
              Hey, what the hell!
    
    Sees Soda Worker in passenger seat.  She nods to DRIVER.
    Truck speeds up.  Paul thinks he's in the clear.
    
                          PAUL
                  (pockets lighter)
              Yeah, go home to your sister moms,
              punk ass bitches.
    
    Sh!t -- truck is stretched across the roadway.  Paul slams
    the brakes, barely misses the truck.  Car stalls in a roadside
    rut.  Looks up -- Driver walking towards him with baseball
    bat.  Smashes front light.
    
    Freaked, Paul tries to manhandle car out of rut but no go.
    He scrambles out the passenger side, into dark
    
    WOODS
    
    Winded, he hunkers down in some overgrowth.
    
                          DRIVER
              Fe fi fo fum, I smell blood of a
              thief around.
    
                          SODA WORKER
                  (kisses Driver)
              Ha, good one.  Come on, mister, make
              it easy.  One way or another you're
              gonna go chug.
    
    Driver and Soda Worker head left, away from Paul.
    
    What the hell?  Paul flicks the lighter to orient himself.
    He spots his car back on the road, decides to double back.
    
    Paul sprints through the brush, almost to his car.
    
    WHOMP -- baseball bat to the gut.
    
    Darkness.
    
    INT. ABANDONED BASEMENT - NIGHT
    
    Paul wakes.  Makes out unsurmountable wall beside him, open
    night sky above.  The remaining basement of demolished house.
    Hears breathing beside him.  Flicks lighter.
    
    MISSING WOMAN from one of the posters is beside him.  She's
    grungy and unsettled.  Two buckets are only other occupants.
    
                          PAUL
              What the -- my god, that smell.
    
                          MISSING WOMAN
              Shhhh.  Quiet for a second.  That's
              the best way to get settled.
    
                          PAUL
              Settled?  What the fvck?
    
                          MISSING WOMAN
              They'll use one bucket for food and
              the other you'll use for... you know.
              And the sooner you start telling
              them how you can be a good person
              the better.  Otherwise...
    
    She shows him her arm covered with cigarette lighter burns.
    
                          PAUL
              Good person?  Shut up.  Just let me
              figure this out.
    
    Quiet.  Broken by --
    
                          MISSING WOMAN
                  (screaming)
              He's awake.  Get me out!  Please.  I
              miss my family.  I miss my son.  I'm
              sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.  I'm
              not a thief any more.
    
    Rope ladder drops down beside the Missing Woman.
    
    She scrambles on.  Ladder pulls up.  Paul grabs at her.
    
    Missing Woman kicks him in the face.  Paul falls.
    
                          MISSING WOMAN
                  (from above)
              I won't tell anyone.  I swear.  On
              my son's life.
    
    Paul looks up.  Sees Soda Worker and Driver leering down.
    
                          SODA WORKER
              Told ya.  You all land with a chug.
    
                          PAUL
              Fvck you.  I mean... I have a family
              too.  They'll miss me.  They will.
              Please... please.
    
    No reply.  Woman's hand hurls lighter into the pit.  Paul
    flicks his lighter and looks right -- lighters surround him.
    
    INT. CHUGWATER SODA FOUNTAIN - NIGHT
    
    Bundled up TIRED WOMAN walks in, past Soda Worker.  Grabs
    candy bar, notices lighter.  Turns it over -- palms it.
    Puts candy bar on counter to pay.  Notices shoplifter sign.
    
                          TIRED WOMAN
              Does that smiley face keep people
              from shoplifting?
    
                          SODA WORKER
              Not really.  Bad people gonna be bad
              people.  Anything else?
    
                          TIRED WOMAN
              Oh crap, this lighter too.  Sorry.
              Last camping trip before the snow.
              So, Chugwater.  What an interesting
              name.
    
                          SODA WORKER
              They say it was the sound buffalo
              made when they fell from the cliffs
              to the ground below.
    
                          TIRED WOMAN
              Whoa.  Wow.  Won't forget that anytime
              soon.
                  (holds up lighter)
              Thanks for the memento.  Cute town.
    
    Tired Woman walks to door, notices missing poster -- Paul's
    face stares out: "PAUL SCHAEFER MISSING SINCE MAY.  DAUGHTER
    MISSES HIM.  REPORT ANY LEADS TO KEEPCHUGWATERCLEAN.COM."
    
    Door held open.
    
                          TIRED WOMAN
              Oh, thank you.  What a gentleman.
              We need more people like you.
    
    Driver smiles, walks in with bucket.  Soda Worker drops in
    apple and carrot sticks.
    
    Driver nods and walks back out.
    
                                                       FADE OUT.

    Leave a comment:


  • dpaterso
    started a topic Entries - Halloween 2020 contest

    Entries - Halloween 2020 contest

    And thus it came to pass that we have 5 entries, which is perhaps the bare minimum for a contest. The titles are:

    Chug
    Space Jockeys
    A Gentlemen's Agreement
    Shamble Inn
    Toaster

    Read the entries and decide which are your 1st, 2nd and 3rd favorites of the bunch.

    PM or email (dpaterson57 at gmail.com) your votes to me by midnight 31st Oct in the format,

    1st - title
    2nd - title
    3rd - title

    Don't vote for your own entry, if this was allowed then everyone would do it so what's the point, it just clouds the voting.

    It helps if you make notes as you read so you remember which scripts tickled you the most, is it visual, are the characters believable, does dialogue sparkle, etc. Who knows, you might post these notes after the results are announced. It's nice to have feedback.

    Shout if you see any formatting problems and I will endeavor to fix 'em. Readers, if anything looks weird, assume it's me and not the author.

    Have fun!


    For posterity, the discussion thread is here and the results thread is here.
    Last edited by dpaterso; 11-01-2020, 03:09 AM. Reason: links added
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