RESULTS - DDP Logline Throwdown II - Comedy

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • RESULTS - DDP Logline Throwdown II - Comedy

    Congratulations to the Winners! I hope everyone had fun - and maybe learned a little about what it takes to craft an effective comedy logline.

    We had 16 writers enter their loglines into the contest! Big thanks to the writers and to everyone who voted!

    Please feel free to post your thoughts here about the logline entries.

    1st Place

    Mark Somers - (#14) ROCKET LAUNCHERS SOLD SEPARATELY (feature). A team of hitmen kidnaps an arms dealer to execute him in front of their mob boss who he ripped off, but the hitmen fail to take into account the arms dealer's overly protective mother and very determined girlfriend. (15 points)

    2nd Place

    Jeff_Lowell - (#9) IZZY GAFFNEY SAVES THE WORLD (feature). In the future, scientists have figured out how to send consciousness through time, implanting it in a new body. When they send a super spy into the past to stop World War 3, they make one small miscalculation and send him into the body of a four year old girl. Can she save the world before her parents make her go down for her nap? (13 points)

    3rd Place

    DaltWisney - (#5) AUTO-PILOT (feature). An indecisive man downloads an app that promises to help him make better choices, but soon realizes that the program has overstepped its boundaries and taken complete control of his reality. (11 points)

    Honorable Mention

    JoeNYC - (#8) MY ALIEN HOTTIE (feature). When a rebellious teen alien crash lands outside small town USA and takes the form of a hot chick, an ordinary teenaged boy scrambles to maneuver her through his parents and the high school social scene without blowing her cover until she repairs her spaceship and zooms home. (10 points)

  • #2
    Complete Voting Results
    (Please let me know of any errors or omissions)


    1. JOE BLOWS UP THE GOLDEN GLOBES (short). After being told he's not diverse enough and fired, a white screenwriter starts planning to blow up the Golden Globes, only to discover the writer who replaced him is pretending to be black. robert-timsah - 0 points

    2. FRESHMAN 45 (feature). A married guy with kids gets into his dream college twenty years after applying (due to a computer glitch) and decides to go against his wife’s wishes as he never got to go to college the first time around. Bono - 7 points

    3. DAY GAMER (feature). After a set of three doors mysteriously appears inside his apartment, a TV gameshow host mired in a career-ending scandal discovers that the people, places and events he encounters each day depends on which one of the three portals he chooses to enter – a welcomed escape from his problems, except when the secret “death door” pops up as one of the three choices. bioprofessor - 7 points

    4. MISGUIDED TOUR (feature). A same sex married couple, one of them ex-military with absolutely no sense of direction, the other a fashion designer allergic to cats and monkeys, decide to celebrate their twentieth anniversary together by booking a group guided tour to the legendary treasure of Kong in Africa. On the Safari, deep in the jungle, the pair become separated from the group. Their only chance for survival is to make their way to the treasure of Kong and hook up with the others, but of course that’s no easy task for these civilized city dwellers. jonpiper - 2 points

    5. AUTO-PILOT (feature). An indecisive man downloads an app that promises to help him make better choices, but soon realizes that the program has overstepped its boundaries and taken complete control of his reality. DaltWisney - 11 points

    6. LAST MAN IN BROOKLYN (feature). After a mysterious catastrophic event destroys NY's five boroughs, a Brooklyn stripper must choose between surviving alone until help arrives or partnering with the only other survivor she meets: a selfish, a$$hole airline baggage handler who never shuts up. But when three vicious garbage collectors from Queens roll in, she decides her chances are better teaming with the last man in Brooklyn, if she can resist killing him herself. sc111 - 4 points

    7. HONK HONK HUNTRESS (feature). While her bail bondsman dad is in hospital getting heart surgery, no one is out there catching the bail jumpers, so party clown Vicky straps on body armor, loads her Smith & Wesson Airweight and goes a-hunting, never mind that she's only 4'10 and weighs 85 pounds. If there's one thing Vicky is really good at, though, it's finding people. But her plans get derailed when her ex-boyfriend calls out of the blue and begs for help, his girlfriend has been kidnapped by morons and if he doesn't pay the ransom then it's goodbye Banana Girl. dpaterso - 5 points

    8. MY ALIEN HOTTIE (feature). When a rebellious teen alien crash lands outside small town USA and takes the form of a hot chick, an ordinary teenaged boy scrambles to maneuver her through his parents and the high school social scene without blowing her cover until she repairs her spaceship and zooms home. JoeNYC - 10 points

    9. IZZY GAFFNEY SAVES THE WORLD (feature). In the future, scientists have figured out how to send consciousness through time, implanting it in a new body. When they send a super spy into the past to stop World War 3, they make one small miscalculation and send him into the body of a four year old girl. Can she save the world before her parents make her go down for her nap? Jeff_Lowell - 13 points

    10. GENERAL PEPPERONI (feature). A corner-hanging, foul-mouthed Philly Goomba named Tony Pepperoni is transported back to 1776 Philadelphia by a bolt of lightning, when he falls for a married woman, the lady’s husband challenges him to a duel. After a lucky shot kills the husband, Tony Pepperoni is told he just killed George Washington and now America looks to him to lead the War of Independence. Cyfress - 6 points

    11. THE PARODY ARTISTES! (feature). 1979. When their puerile, gag-filled first feature film bombs, three irreverent, stubborn comedians from Wisconsin make a last-gasp effort to break into Hollywood with a new script no studio will touch — a puerile, gag-filled airline-disaster-spoof that will feature shi* hitting a fan, human-on-inflatable-doll fellatio, bestiality, drug use,… and disco. Not at all partly based on a totally trueish heartwarming story! ZAZluvr - 3 points

    12. HALF-WITS (feature). A shameless brother and sister compete to outdumb each other for a family fortune intended for its most inept member, but when they land themselves in a life or death situation, they'll have to dumb their way to safety or risk losing the inheritance. Prezzy - 8 points

    13.THE NUISANCE (feature). An entitled millennial couple must be “star” witnesses in a jury trial when the working class neighbor they’ve wrongly accused of nuisance decides to defend himself in eviction court. lostfootage - 0 points

    14. ROCKET LAUNCHERS SOLD SEPARATELY (feature). A team of hitmen kidnaps an arms dealer to execute him in front of their mob boss who he ripped off, but the hitmen fail to take into account the arms dealer's overly protective mother and very determined girlfriend. Mark Somers - 15 points

    15. SNEAKING SUSPICIONS (feature). A married couple begin to suspect each other of having an affair and enlist their respective friends to help catch the other in the act. muckraker - 5 points

    16. HENCH! (feature). Following the sudden demise of their supervillain bosses, a band of veteran henchmen must figure out how to pull heists the old-fashioned way... unwittingly incurring the wrath of a shadowy crime lord. Mitchel McLean - 6 points

    Comment


    • #3
      For the nerds among us...
      Logline Number 1st tally 2nd tally 3rd tally 1st votes 2nd votes 3rd votes Aggregate 1st Aggregate 2nd Aggregate 3rd Total Aggregate Score
      1 0 0 0 0
      2 x x x x 1 1 2 3 2 2 7
      3 x x x 1 2 3 4 0 7
      4 x 1 0 2 0 2
      5 x x x x x x x 1 2 4 3 4 4 11
      6 x x x 1 2 0 2 2 4
      7 x x 1 1 3 2 0 5
      8 x x x x x x x x 2 6 0 4 6 10
      9 x x x x x 3 2 9 4 0 13
      10 x x 2 6 0 0 6
      11 x 1 3 0 0 3
      12 x x x 2 1 6 2 0 8
      13 0 0 0 0
      14 x x x x x x 3 3 9 6 0 15
      15 x x 1 1 3 2 0 5
      16 x x x x 1 3 3 0 3 6

      Comment


      • #4
        I love you, Mark! Congrats.

        I liked all 4 of those even if they didn't get my final vote... I did vote for Alien Hottie and Auto Pilot.

        Comment


        • #5
          I'd like to thank the Academy...and Bono.

          Comment


          • #6
            Jeff's idea is very funny -- but I took time to think all of these ideas through and I said to myself -- if this isn't animated I don't see how you find a 4 year old lead for the movie. 14 sure. You can get an 18 year old to play younger. But who is the 4 year old that is leading the movie? I guess maybe the logline is hinting that her parents are the leads of the movie, but it's not clear to me...

            I was thinking like a rep and casting and asking questions in my head.

            Comment


            • #7
              I find it very interesting that Joe's idea finished 4th in points, but he got 8 votes -- the most out of anyone.

              Comment


              • #8
                Well done, Mark!

                I had Joe's as my #2 - ET with a romantic twist is a great idea.

                i went Sneaking Suspicions in first place (felt like a fresh take on a romantic comedy), Joe's, and Hench third. Henchmen getting their moment was funny - I saw the cast of Henchmen from Dr. Horrible having to step up.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by JeffLowell View Post

                  I had Joe's as my #2 - ET with a romantic twist is a great idea.
                  I'd 100% start writing that idea Joe...

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by DaltWisney View Post
                    I'd like to thank the Academy...and Bono.
                    Start writing that idea too! Auto-Pilot is a great title.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Bono View Post
                      But who is the 4 year old that is leading the movie?
                      It's funny - I pitched it to someone today, and I pitched it as a 10 year old. 4 does seem too young. I screwed myself out of a victory!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by JeffLowell View Post

                        It's funny - I pitched it to someone today, and I pitched it as a 10 year old. 4 does seem too young. I screwed myself out of a victory!
                        I think you're going to be okay. Ha. But seriously was the child the lead or more a prop in the movie? And the parents are the leads? Or you didn't think it through yet.

                        Great title. I thought it was someone else's idea btw.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          In my BACK TO SCHOOL rip off, I did the math wrong as the idea was the lead is 45 -- and Freshman 15 weight gain -- so I got Freshman 45 which I thought was a fun title.

                          But age 45 minus 20 years means he was 25 when he applied to college when he should be 17 or 18.

                          So my logline should be 28 years after applying not 20.

                          I know no one cares. But I do!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Mark -- you won -- so you can tell me to eat dog poop -- but who is the person we are cheering for in your logline? If you write this, I think you should make arms dealer some type of innocent person so we at home want them and their sister/mom to win. The reason I didn't vote for that idea is because of that reason. I didn't see who the hero was.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              dpat -- what the hell does "goodbye banana girl" mean? I read it 10 times and I still don't know if it's some expression I should know... but i think you had 2 ideas in one and if you just had one sentence with Vicky the tiny bounty hunter, you would have done much better in this contest... also I like to think me and mark inspired the heart surgery plot device... also new title and I think you can have a fun movie...

                              TINY HUNTER -- While her bail bondsman dad is in hospital getting heart surgery, no one is out there catching the bail jumpers, so party clown Vicky straps on body armor, loads her Smith & Wesson Airweight and goes a-hunting, never mind that she's only 4'10 and weighs 85 pounds.


                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X