Good Notes Cheap

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  • tony6pack
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    Let me just start by saying Bart didn't ask me to post in this thread.

    It's been a bit quiet in this thread lately. Some of these comments are from years back. So I thought I would share my experience with anyone looking for feedback but hasn't used Bart's services before.

    By looking over this thread, Bart gets a lot of praise. But what did I get with Bart?

    Well, I sent my script to Bart on a Friday. He advised beforehand he was just finishing up some work but he would read my script on the weekend. I had the coverage back in my inbox on Sunday so his turnaround was 2 days. This guy is fast. He tells me the two days is him reading then sleeping on what I've sent him.

    I also asked Bart to be real. No blowing smoke. Don't bs or sugar coat anything. Tell it like it is.

    So, I received 2 sections of notes. Page by page notes which gives Bart's immediate reactions to scenes and events, pacing and writing style as he reads your script.

    Then at the end there's more overall notes based on knowing the entire story and he gives you suggestions how to better reach your desired outcome.

    That's his wording and it's accurate. I received 2 pages back of professional notes. They were very good and well worth the $135.

    Now, here's where it gets interesting.

    If there were 2 CAMPS; I LIKE THIS SCRIPT, or I DON'T LIKE THIS SCRIPT. Bart was in the I DON'T LIKE camp. But he left it open for discussion. A back and forth which invited any questions. He thought it would be good for me.

    I wrote up my list of questions and sent them to Bart. I gave him my reactions to what he said and suggested potential fixes.

    I didn't understand at that point that my band-aid fixes weren't fixing the real issues. There's core elements broken in my story. What I was trying to do wasn't feasible. I didn't understand that yet.

    Bart never told me I couldn't do anything... But within 1 email, he responded back with some VERY important information about what I was proposing to do. I read what he said over and over again for 2.5 hours. He was right. The light came on.

    He taught me a lot about character.. stuff I had no idea about. And told me about 3 films I could go and rent which taught me a lot as well... stuff I wasn't doing and didn't understand. But Bart thought I could learn from these films. He told me what to look out for. I've watched 1 of the films so far. If only I had this knowledge earlier.

    I'm so thankful he gave me these suggestions. These lessons and info Bart gave me will most definitely help my rewrites and my future spec scripts.

    I told him where I wanted my story to go. He told me what he thought and gave a few great suggestions. And gave me more information to think about. From what he was telling me, I started to get more what I needed to do to start writing at a higher level.

    He also taught me about the 1st 10 pages.

    He also suggested a few other things to help me.

    I do believe, if I can study and understand everything.... and *implement* what I've learned from Bart/ the films, I'll be a better writer.

    Anyway, hope this helps. I think someone else said this, but I'm glad I have someone like Bart in my corner. The best $135 I ever spent.

    I'm out.

    tony6pack

    PS - thanks again.

    Leave a comment:


  • ExtHollywoodDay
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    (responded to particulars of request via email)

    But since it's come up... I read every genre, and I like a good screenplay in any genre.

    "Have you ever covered an [insert genre]" is the number one question I get, so maybe I should address this generally.

    If there's ever determined to be a genre of script I haven't read, I'll be very pleasantly surprised. Drama, Comedy, Romcom, Historic, Action, Thriller, Mystery, Sci-Fi, Horror, Slasher, Procedurals, Sitcoms, comic books, book adaptations, sequels, remakes. it's all been on my desk as a film company reader and in my current service. Of course hybrid combinations of the above and subgenres exist.

    The closest thing to a 'new genre' that I've run across, in books anyway, is this thing they're calling Bizarro Fiction. Exemplified by the book ShatnerQuake in which all the characters William Shatner has played gang up to try to kill him. Maybe you could argue that's close to the Charlie Kaufman brand of odd comedies.

    Anyway, the answer to "Have you ever covered an [insert genre]" is yes.

    Leave a comment:


  • tony6pack
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    Hey Bart!

    How's it going down there in Hollywood?

    You still doing coverage?

    If so, I'd like to use your service. But my script won't be ready until probably next year.

    Do you like horror screenplays?

    Could you email me a sample coverage for a horror screenplay you've done? If so, I'll pm you my email address.

    What will your coverage cost me?

    Thanks!

    Leave a comment:


  • ExtHollywoodDay
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    Always a mensch, Pardack.

    Gracias.

    Leave a comment:


  • Pardack
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    Originally posted by spacefarer View Post
    I used Bart's service a couple of times in the recent past.

    He was very helpful and his comments were right on the spot.

    Putting it all together, it resulted in my script being considered for representation with an offer on the table.

    I would definitely recommend, Bart.

    Ditto. Of course I've been recommending Bart's service for a long time, up to and including my getting signed.

    Ironically, this made him a victim of his own success- as I didn't have occasion to get a script read aside from my manager for a while.

    Lo and behold I resolved this year to dust off a passion project of yore and see how far I might be able to take it. Just got notes. Bart hasn't missed a beat (or raised the price.) Easily my favorite resource for notes on a screenplay at any stage of development.

    P
    A
    R
    D
    A
    C
    K

    Leave a comment:


  • spacefarer
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    I used Bart's service a couple of times in the recent past.

    He was very helpful and his comments were right on the spot.

    Putting it all together, it resulted in my script being considered for representation with an offer on the table.

    I would definitely recommend, Bart.
    Last edited by spacefarer; 11-18-2009, 04:56 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • QueenOfCups
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    De Nada.

    Leave a comment:


  • ExtHollywoodDay
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    Originally posted by QueenOfCups View Post
    I just completed a set of notes and follow up emails with Bart, and I am happy to cast my vote in the 'well worth the price of admission' camp.

    He asked me tough questions that cut to the core of the script- tough but smart. I clearly have to do some work on the script, but I'm more convinced than ever that I have the heart of a good story sussed out now.

    I also got great style pointers along the way. I will definitely continue to use his service for future projects.


    Thanks, D.J., always nice to hear when positive momentum is created for a client.

    Leave a comment:


  • QueenOfCups
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    I just completed a set of notes and follow up emails with Bart, and I am happy to cast my vote in the 'well worth the price of admission' camp.

    He asked me tough questions that cut to the core of the script- tough but smart. I clearly have to do some work on the script, but I'm more convinced than ever that I have the heart of a good story sussed out now.

    I also got great style pointers along the way. I will definitely continue to use his service for future projects.

    Leave a comment:


  • ComicBent
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    I have opened a "stub" thread here for further discussion of Steve's script, once I finish reading it and putting some notes together.

    I will post some of my thoughts there, once I finish reading the script and put some notes together. I believe Steve has agreed to have Bart provide his notes also. Then there was a second professional review, too.

    In the meantime, if you have anything to say on this subject, please post it in the new thread instead of here in Bart's thread.

    Leave a comment:


  • beejay
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    Bart, thanks for the info.

    edited: emailing you this question.

    Leave a comment:


  • ExtHollywoodDay
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    Originally posted by stephenleehess View Post
    Dear Comic,

    It would be my pleasure to send you my script and I'd be happy for Bart to post his notes.

    Thanks guys,

    Steve
    Let's make it even more interesting... when Comic's ready, post this other dude's 'Consider.' Let's move this to a new Smackdown thread.

    Leave a comment:


  • ExtHollywoodDay
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    "Credit is in short supply, blame is plentiful"

    - written on the bathroom wall at Sony.


    I've also done a bunch of rewrite jobs but who knows how they'll turn out if they get produced. Selling a script is tough, Beejay, but getting the script you sold made, as opposed to a distant cousin version, is even tougher. Regrettably, the way WGA credits work, it can be in a rewriter's financial interest to change stuff even if it doesn't really need to be changed.

    Two examples are Curious George and the Flintstones... dozens of writers had the assignment one after another over a decade each, and every one tried to change it enough to get credit.

    Leave a comment:


  • beejay
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    gotcha, assuming you mean the Band Camp that turned into American Pie Band Camp. If they destroyed his original script, then this would make sense that he wouldn't mention it by name.

    all good, was just curious about that, thanks Pardack.

    Leave a comment:


  • Pardack
    replied
    Re: Good Notes Cheap

    Originally posted by beejay View Post
    Bart, you glossed right over my question.

    I know you have bigger fish to fry, but I am curious. This would be something that would separate you from the average guy doing notes. An actual sale.
    That separation is part of his whole pitch, Beejay. He has sold and is WGA.

    I read his Band Camp spec a few years back out of curiosity. I personally think Universal ruined his draft by the time they produced it.

    Leave a comment:

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