Rod Hilton's Abridged Scripts

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  • Rod Hilton's Abridged Scripts

    Craig Mazin just posted a link to this site. It's like You Tube, in a world without warez Avids and illiterate 12 yr olds.

    Funny as hell. Sure I'm the last person to hear about it, it's only been going for nine years.

    Suddenly the car chase ends abruptly. DANIEL gets TORTURED, then NOT TORTURED.

    EVA GREEN
    I love you inexplicably. We don't actually need to have any chemistry to get away with this big character change, right?

    DANIEL CRAIG
    Let's make up for the lack of chemistry by tacking on 30 minutes of trite, mushy garbage.

    Their relationship ends VERY BADLY.

    DANIEL CRAIG
    Ha! This justifies my reprehensible womanizing later in the series!

    JUDI DENCH
    Now we just need to justify an invisible car driving through an ice castle.

    END
    RADHA MITCHELL
    Hmm. I just discovered something interesting. Every 22 years, there is complete darkness, which is exactly what all these alien things need in order to eat all of us.

    RANDOM FACELESS CHARACTER
    How did these creatures survive for 22 years if they need to feed on humans to live? What do they eat while underground and in caves and all that ****?

    He is killed.
    We are introduced to a handful of OTHER CHARACTERS, including a kickboxer who will NOT actually fight any snakes, making him lame and worthless.

    Suddenly, there are a bunch of SNAKES. ON A PLANE! Everyone who has not had a line in the movie is KILLED

    ...Everyone grabs onto something and SAMUEL shoots the window. Suddenly, HUNDREDS OF SNAKES and apparently ONE CARTOON HORSE are sucked out of the plane.
    Check out the Miami Vice script. It was the best movie of 2006, but still.
    The Complete IfilmPro DEVELOPMENT FORUM (PDF)
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