Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #16
    Re: Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

    Originally posted by Jon Jay View Post

    Cinderella: Stepmotherf**ker - A young assassin tracks down evil stepmothers and sticks a glass slipper up their a**. Catchphrase: 'It fits!'

    Okay, Pal. Put the slipper down and back slowly away from the Cinderella-is-thief/assassin revisionist actioner. Otherwise you and me are gonna have words!

    Originally posted by karsten View Post
    I remember reading the script for this and finding it extremely off-putting. I've read a few other "revamped" fairy-tale scripts, and each seems to be worse than the next. And I'm pretty much the ideal target market for this: a lover of period-action films with a special penchant for European folklore and history and literature. But I am continually disappointed with the product.
    Clearly you never read Shotgun Cinderella.... or, oh god maybe you did. Now I'm gonna be paranoid for the rest of the morning.

    Comment


    • #17
      Re: Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

      Originally posted by Harbinger View Post
      Clearly you never read Shotgun Cinderella.... or, oh god maybe you did. Now I'm gonna be paranoid for the rest of the morning.
      I don't know what that is.

      Originally posted by Jon Jay View Post
      I had high hopes for Gilliam's Brothers Grimm
      I actually walked out of that movie. Walked right out.

      Comment


      • #18
        Witch Hunters

        Originally posted by karsten View Post
        The pity of it is that these scripts/films could be great. The basic idea is brilliant: taking European folk tales, fables, myths and legends, and giving them an exciting, cinematic treatment, whether in an eerie horror vein, an action premise, or ideally, a combination of both.

        But instead of exploring the treasure-trove of European folklore and adding the kind of period detail that would give these films richness (few of us ever lose our innate fascinating with knights and armor and fantasy -- witness LOTR), these scripts create characters with absurdly anachronistic values and attitudes and saddle them with ridiculous steampunk technology.
        I'd be more inclined to provide some Canadian content to such tales. There is a rich trove of French Canadian folklore that hasn't been dealt with in the cinema, along with native superstitions. For examples, the cannibal spirits of the Wendigo and the Loup-garou werewolves. One of the most neglected, (yet observed a few times by European explorers), was the "shaking tent" ceremony. A shaman would be tied up, (like Houdini), and put into a tent, alone. Soon, the tent would be shaking violently with strange noises emanating from within, (like an old spiritualist's cabinet), whilst the shaman communicated with the spirits.

        According to Melbourne Christopher, one of the oldest and most performed Native American mysteries was a ritual know as the shaking tent. It was an important and often performed shamanistic ritual amongst the North American Cree Culture. It played an important role in the yearly cycle of harvest and other ritual activities of the Innu people of Quebec and Labrador.

        “It was not only an important method of direct communication with the caribou and other animal masters, as well as with Mishtapeu and cannibal spirits, it was also a source of amusement. The shaman used the tent to look into the hidden world of animal spirits, and to make contact with Innu in distant groups.

        “Sheshatshiu Innu who have seen the shaking tent say that it was a small, conically-shaped tent, with caribou hide covering and four, six, or eight poles depending on the spiritual power (manitushiun) of the shaman (the shaman is called the Kakushapatak, officient, in the context of the ritual). It would be set up inside another tent on a floor of freshly picked fir boughs. Younger men would act as assistants (apprentices?) to the Kakushapatak in setting up the tent.

        “As soon as the Kakushapatak stuck his head in the tent, it would start to shake violently, indicating that the officient had been joined by a spirit, usually Mishtapeu who helped him communicate with the other spirits."

        ~ http://theilluminatedshowman.blogspo...deception.html
        Instead of medieval "steampunk", I'd prefer to deal with the late 19th and early 20th centuries, (when Houdini was going after fraudulent spiritualists), but one of his colleagues might encounter something more frightening that has loosed the bonds of an elderly Indian shaman.
        JEKYLL & CANADA (free .mp4 download @ Vimeo.com)

        Comment


        • #19
          Re: Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

          Originally posted by wcmartell View Post
          The CGI stuff just looks bad - but I don't think it is any worse than others films. Maybe I'm just over CGI and want to see more practical FX work for a while.
          I'm kinda the same way. CGI is great for certain things, but still pretty bad at portraying larger animals. Every time I see it, it rips me right out of the movie.

          I loved the first half of I Am Legend, but once the creatures showed up. Dear God. Never mind the second half sucking on its own. Other movies right off hand that put me off was the giant humanoid alien in Prometheus (couldn't just use an actor there?). Also those terrible CGI dogs at the end of Hunger Games. I started cracking up in the theater. That's not what you want during the peak orgasm of your movie.

          Comment


          • #20
            Re: Witch Hunters

            Originally posted by Fortean View Post
            One of the most neglected, (yet observed a few times by European explorers), was the "shaking tent" ceremony. A shaman would be tied up, (like Houdini), and put into a tent, alone. Soon, the tent would be shaking violently with strange noises emanating from within, (like an old spiritualist's cabinet), whilst the shaman communicated with the spirits.
            Man, people are so easily duped.

            Comment


            • #21
              Re: Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

              I don't think the trailer works at all. With a 60 million budget, I could easily see this bombing.

              Interestingly, I generally love Gemma Arterton, and she should be a good match with this kind of film. But in the trailer her delivery is really off, all the way. Renner is better. At least Gemma looks great, as always.

              But it's nice to see the Norwegian director-writer of the low-budget Nazi-zombie film Dead Snow getting a big Hollywood gig like this. It's a career trajectory most of us can ever only dream about, so good for him. He also wrote this film.

              I do suspect the film will be better than the trailer. It's just a badly structured, badly edited piece of an advertisement.

              Comment


              • #22
                Re: Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

                Originally posted by karsten View Post
                I don't know what that is.
                Good. That means you couldn't have disliked it. I hear it's a great script though. And the writer's pretty well endowed.... that's what I heard anyway.

                As to Hansel and Gretel? Meh, I sort of don't mind it. Yes, it's a bit silly, but aspects of the trailer make me think they sort of know it is.

                I have no problem with a movie that knows what it is. The ridiculous one-liners. The crazy gadgets and weaponry (which look insanely cool by the way. What's that circular crossbow like mechanism halfway through the trailer?). The costumes. Stylized action. All looks like fun to me. That said, I won't be queuing for it.

                The movies that irk me are the ones that think they're cleverer than they are. The poorly executed twist movie. The plothole ridden time travelerers.

                Some fairytale revisionist nonsense about Witchhunters? Bit of fun. Then it'll buried to be forgotten with all the other fluff fantasy films.

                Comment


                • #23
                  Re: Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

                  Originally posted by Harbinger View Post
                  Good. That means you couldn't have disliked it. I hear it's a great script though.
                  Looked it up. No access to the script, but it has a great logline.

                  The writer deserves every success.

                  Comment


                  • #24
                    Re: Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

                    Originally posted by tuukka View Post
                    I do suspect the film will be better than the trailer.
                    It's not. Just about eighty minutes longer. Not counting credits.

                    ETA: I mean, it's not worse than the trailer. But it's still pretty much just empty calories.
                    Last edited by Signal30; 01-28-2013, 03:29 PM.
                    "Forget it, Jake. It's Hollywood."

                    My YouTube channel.

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Re: Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters

                      This looks like the same movie I've seen or wisely avoided going back to like Van Helsing.

                      It's like the lame fantasy-action version of the Tom Clancy plot generator. Same visuals, same scenes, same fights, same BS just a different year. God Hollywood can be garbage.

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X