Smallville - Black Kryptonite?!



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  • Smallville - Black Kryptonite?!

    They replayed the season 4 premiere tonight.

    Even though I'd seen this episode before, the whole deus ex machina of the "black kryptonite" still kinda bothers me.

    It doesn't exist.

    The writers made it up.

    I'm probably the only geek out there bothered by that.

    Okay, rant over....for now.

    Carry on.

  • #2
    You may be shocked to learn that green kryptonite doesn't exist, either.


    • #3

      I meant in the world of Superman mythos, not the "real world," silly!


      • #4
        I know, I know.

        Seriously, though, there used to be all different colors of kryptonite. There was never a black?


        • #5

          Green, Red, Blue (for Bizarro), Yellow (was actually fake), White (only killed plants), and even "jeweled."

          Never black.



          • #6
            Well, now there's black!

            Seriously, I don't watch Smallville regularly, but isn't it already different from the comics in a lot of major ways?


            • #7
              Seriously, I don't watch Smallville regularly, but isn't it already different from the comics in a lot of major ways?
              Yeah, both Lana and Lois are really hot.


              • #8
                Well, there you go.


                • #9
                  out geekin' y'all

                  Green Kryptonite: weakens and eventually kills super-powered Kryptonians. Usually harmless to other races, but one story in Brave and the Bold had a device used which resulted in Terrans being affected similar to Kryptonians.

                  Anti-Kryptonite: similar to Green K, but affects non-super-powered Kryptonians. This was a retcon used to explain why the non-powered Argo City residents could be killed by what seemed to be Green K.

                  X-Kryptonite: Only one chunk, it was created by Supergirl trying to find a cure for Green K. It gives Terrans, or at least Terran cats, Kryptonian style powers for a limited time.

                  Red Kryptonite: Causes a specific, odd, effect. Often involved physical transformations or mental changes. Each chunk had a different effect, and could only affect a given Kryptonian once. Effects usually wore off in 24-48 hours. Created when Green K passed through a space cloud.

                  Gold Kryptonite: Removes a Kryptonian's super-powers permanently. Created when Green K passed through a different space cloud.

                  White Kryptonite: Kills any plant life from any world. Yep, another space cloud.

                  Blue Kryptonite: Has the same effect on Bizarro Kryptonians as Green K does on real Kryptonians. Created by the same imperfect duplicator ray that created the Bizarros.

                  Jewel Kryptonite: Remnents of Krypton's Jewel Mountains, it allows Phantom Zone residents to focus their mental energy and cause explosions in the outside world.

                  Two notable fake varieties are Silver and Yellow K. Silver was used to keep Superman from closely investigating what turned out to be a 25th (silver) anniversary gift for him from his friends, and Yellow was used by Luthor to fake out what he thought was Superman. It turned out it was a Superman robot ordered to react to Kryptonite like the real thing. When Luthor found this out, he returned all the gold from Fort Knox which he'd stolen.


                  • #10
                    Back when I read Action comics, it was just green. How many
                    times has Superman died now?

                    Stopped reading a long time ago. - Charli


                    • #11
                      That's a whole lotta space clouds.


                      • #12
                        Whistle, I'm about to out-geek your out-geek.

                        You TOTALLY copied and pasted that from the FAQ section of!

                        It's word for word.

                        Only a fellow geek would know that.


                        • #13
                          the superman rafaq to be exact. I knew most of'em off the top of my head, but I couldn't remember if it was gold or yellow that was the robot fake one and what was up with the silver one.

                          A Slam Poet I saw performed this live awhile back;
                          THE GEEK WANTS OUT !!!
                           At first glance
                          I probably appear to be a somewhat ordinary,
                          somewhat average looking fellow.
                          Calm, harmless, at ease.
                          But this is by design.
                          You see, it is through decades of research and rigorous training that I have crafted this façade of normalcy.
                          And now, through intense concentration,
                          I am able to function in a social setting.
                          I can speak at length with educated people about
                          pertinent matters of public importance,
                          such as literature, 
                          or the current political climate in Europe.
                          I am capable of conversing with you 
                          without ever revealing that just underneath the surface 
                          of this manufactured veneer 
                          there hides an altogether different person.
                          A monster, some might say.
                          My alter-ego.
                          He is the opposite of the image I project.
                          He is the antithesis of Cool.
                          He is the LAST person you want to get trapped in a conversation with.
                          He is The Geek.
                          The obsessive science fiction movie watching, 
                          comic book collecting, 
                          Monty Python dialogue memorizing, 
                          Dungeons and Dragons playing GEEK
                          that I struggle daily to keep hidden from the world.
                          But The Geek Wants Out.
                          He want to talk to you.
                          He wants to give you his doctoral dissertation on why 
                          The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension 
                          is the greatest @#%$ film of all time!
                          He wants to bitch slap you because 
                          youâ€TMve never seen Big Trouble in Little China. 
                          What? Have you been living in a @#%$ cave?!
                          He wants to kick your ass in Star Wars Trivial Pursuit. 
                          And he will.
                          Because heâ€TMs a @#%$ Geek.
                          And he wants his toys.
                          He wants the complete set 
                          in mint condition, 
                          still in the box.
                          He wants every item on the planet that is even remotely related to Ultraman. 
                          Because Ultraman is Airwolf!
                          He could give a squirt of piss 
                          about sports or politics or rhetoric.
                          Such things are of no consequence to him.
                          What matters is the release date of the next Star Wars movie!
                          You see, The Geek canâ€TMt wait.
                          The Geek has no patience.
                          He wants what he wants when he wants it.
                          And all he wants is stupid @#%$!
                          He wants his own Tardis.
                          He wants his own light saber.
                          He wants to buy a DeLorean and he wants to drive it 88 miles per hour.
                          He wants movies.
                          He wants to see the Directorâ€TMs Cut. 
                          He wants the impossible to find Japanese bootleg with 
                          6 minutes of never-before-seen footage.
                          He wants to watch Blade Runner. Again.
                          He wants to watch Brazil. Again.
                          He wants to watch A Clockwork Orange. 
                          Again and Again!
                          But I deprive him of these things, as best I can, 
                          until I can no longer ignore his voice 
                          screaming in my head.
                          I am Jekyl. He is Hyde.
                          I am Bruce Banner. He is the Hulk.
                          Especially the Hulk from issues #272 to #378.
                          But no longer! 
                          I am putting a stop to all this nerdy @#%$ right now!
                          Iâ€TMm an adult, for Christâ€TMs sake!
                          And this body isnâ€TMt big enough for the both of us.
                          One of us has to go, and itâ€TMs gonna be him.
                          I banishing the Geek forever to the Phantom Zone,
                          just like in Superman II !
                          Because, in the end â€" 
                          there can be only one.
                          I swear I immediatly thought of Dclary. That doesn't apply to me, since I don't think Buckaroo is the best movie ever. It's not.


                          • #14

                            I don't know what's more funny, that poem or the fact that I just stood in front of my computer and performed it.


                            • #15
                              I will now no longer feel guilty watching "Smallville," now knowing that I don't even approach the far end of the geek spectrum. 0]

                              When I first heard the idea, I was completely unenthusiastic. Fortunately, a friend taped episodes and kept mentioning it until I watched them. I don't know how the writers could develop an entire series without making up new things. I think Chloe was one of their best inventions.