Official Script REVIEW Thread

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  • Re: Official Script REVIEW Thread

    Originally posted by Nigel_T View Post
    The Low Dweller

    I dunno, maybe I just don't get it. And I don't mean "The Low Dweller" in particular. Maybe I just don't understand what makes a screenplay work. Whatever the deal, here's another highly touted script that left me bewildered . . .

    Pros: I guess the characters and atmosphere are well done. There are some great patches of dialogue. There's definitely a strong sense of place throughout the script. And no glaring technical flubs; I never lost track of a character or had confusion about the passage of time, stuff like that.

    Cons: I didn't really click with any of the characters. Maybe one or two minor characters had a little zing, but the main guy and his plight? . . . meh. The overall plot was cool, but my attention wandered. There's a not-very-original love triangle. And the climax seems to go for an unapologetically brutal finish - because that's how life is - but as noir climaxes go, it's predictable.

    But here's my biggest gripe: I couldn't get around the over-heated and awkward voice. I finally started hearing it as coming from someone who can turn a phrase (or was told so by his high school English teacher), but who never bothered to read good writers (that is, not just screenwriters) and doesn't realize he's sounding silly, much of the time.

    So maybe I sound like a whiney crank who's just bitter that someone else got a big break. I guess that's true. But to my original point - that I don't get what makes a screenplay work - I kept thinking, "how did this undisciplined voice, which is so unabashedly in love with itself, get such a huge sale?" I have that question a lot lately.
    I've struggled with it for the same reasons. I tried about 15 times to read this screenplay because I have really wanted to get through it and see if I could figure out what the big deal was but couldn't ever get more than halfway through. I'm not bothered that this screenwriter made such a huge sale on this (good for him) I would just like to know why. I have a degree in lit so I can handle some pretty dense writing styles but when I was reading this I keep thinking, "lay off the flowery and get to the damn story!"

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    • Re: Official Script REVIEW Thread

      I just read the first draft of Death Note. I realize this was written back in 2009 but... WOW quite possibly some of the worst writing I've ever read. I don't think they even read the source material. I had to stop reading several times to wrap my head around how these guys landed the job.

      I hope to god they were pressured by the higher ups to write so poorly.

      Is there any hope for Manga/Anime adaptations in NA? It's hard enough in Asia.
      Thank you for reading my opinion.

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      • Re: Official Script REVIEW Thread

        Originally posted by huge_tree View Post
        I just read the first draft of Death Note. I realize this was written back in 2009 but... WOW quite possibly some of the worst writing I've ever read. I don't think they even read the source material. I had to stop reading several times to wrap my head around how these guys landed the job.

        I hope to god they were pressured by the higher ups to write so poorly.

        Is there any hope for Manga/Anime adaptations in NA? It's hard enough in Asia.
        Damn. I heard Shane Black was gonna adapt it. Hmm, looked it up again:
        Black will oversee a script that's being written by Anthony Bagarozzi and Charles Mondry, his accomplices on Doc Savage, a
        "It's my favorite manga, I was just struck by its unique and brilliant sensibility,- Black said. "What we want to do is take it back to that manga, and make it closer to what is so complex and truthful about the spirituality of the story, versus taking the concept and trying to copy it as an American thriller. Jeff Robinov and Greg Silverman liked that.- Black's repped by WME and GreenLit Creative.
        Hopefully Black will toss out the script then and write a new one or something.

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        • Re: Official Script REVIEW Thread

          Originally posted by Archduke View Post
          Damn. I heard Shane Black was gonna adapt it. Hmm, looked it up again:




          Hopefully Black will toss out the script then and write a new one or something.
          Thank god (no pun intended). Vlas and Charles Parlapanides were terrible.
          Thank you for reading my opinion.

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